geek-test-2001

							THE GEEK TEST
I have been... __ in A/V club __ a theater techie __ to a gamecon __ to another con __ host at any con __ game master __ a computer lab monitor __ in a fan club or on their mailing list __ in the SCA __ seriously involved in the SCA __ Trivial Pursuit winner > 10 times __ called a geek __ several times __ in “smart” classes __ impatient to see the Lord of the Rings films __ a scout for 10+ years __ a high school mascot __ in marching band __ to band camp __ to a math/science camp __ in the chess club __ on any sort of academic team __ in a math competition __ placed high or won __ in a science competition __ placed high or won __ to museums by my own freewill __ referred to as Dilbert __ referred to as Velma __ dumped at a dance __ dumped at a Star Trek convention I have... __ roleplayed __ 3+ times a week __ for 12 hours straight __ programmed a calculator in math class __ studied a language on my own __ gone to a party just to play Trivial Pursuit __ attended a geek party __ been really excited about attending a geek party __ a phone number with GEEK as the last four digits __ or something equally geeky:______________ __ always hated mainstream __ a Ph.D. __ worn a costume other than for Halloween __ done homework that wasn’t required __ done homework for somebody else __ attended public academic lectures on my own __ studied an artificial language (i.e. Esperanto, Klingon) __ created an artificial language __ worn 2+ watches at the same time __ to keep track of multiple time zones __ taken the Mensa test __ joined Mensa __ talked to plants to help them grow __ named a pet after a scientist or inventor __ after a gaming, literary, or B-movie character __ after a mythological being __ after a technical term __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ gone to the movies alone founded a club of any sort solved a Rubix cube solved an entire 500+ piece puzzle thought I could win a quiz show corrected a professor in class corrected a salesperson on technical specs corrected a supervisor on spelling or grammar written a letter to the editor snorted while laughing never turned down a date held an office in the SCA written articles for SCA publications used “authenticity police” in a sentence been accused of being in the authenticity police indexed and catalogued any personal collection

I have seen (2+ times)… __ Bladerunner __ Clerks __ The Dark Crystal __ The Fly __ Highlander: the movie __ The Last Starfighter __ Any Monty Python movie __ The Neverending Story __ Princess Bride __ Rocky Horror Picture Show __ Spaceballs __ TRON __ War Games __ Any Star Trek movie __ All Star Trek movies __ The Star Wars Trilogy __ Star Wars Episode I __ Transformers: the movie __ Weird Science __ Any Kung Fu movie made before 1980 I routinely watch… __ Dexter’s Lab __ Ren & Stimpy __ X-Files __ Star Trek __ Star Trek: The Next Generation __ Star Trek: Voyager __ Deep Space 9 __ Babylon 5 __ Farscape __ Buffy the Vampire Slayer __ MST3K __ Quantum Leap __ Highlander __ spinoff shows of any of the above __ documentaries __ Anime __ History Channel __ Weather Channel

1 ©2001 www.innergeek.us

THE GEEK TEST
I have read... __ Hitchhiker’s Guide __ Lord of the Rings __ Robert Heinlein __ Robert Jordan __ Anne McCaffrey __ Stephen Hawking __ Isaac Asimov __ The Knowne Worlde Handbook __ books on math/science outside class __ books on grammar outside class __ history books outside class __ Russian literature outside class __ gaming books __ cover to cover __ entire calculator manuals __ entire computer manuals __ software/computer language books __ for a reading circle or book club __ joke/humor books for self-enrichment I believe... __ in unicorns __ in dragons __ in fairies __ in trolls or leprechauns __ in aliens __ in vampires __ that I am a vampire __ in the Force __ that anything can be fixed __ Linux is the only worthwhile OS __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ > 1 video game system an exotic animal an endangered species binoculars telescope microscope magnifying glass laser pointer

I own... __ pocket protector __ Rubix cube __ 2+ Rubix cubes __ more than one slinky __ four-color pen __ whole/partial set of figurines __ multi-sided dice __ a gaming book __ several gaming books __ Magic the Gathering cards __ 1 or 2 computers __ 3+ computers __ PDA, pager, and cell phone __ 2+ CD burners __ Sun, HP, SGI server __ 2+ DVD players __ 2+ sound effects CDs __ art made from color gels __ several MP3’s __ a techie black outfit __ script to any Monty Python film __ any Star Wars film __ any Star Trek film __ several maps and/or globes __ thermometer that also measures humidity __ 2+ dictionaries __ > 1 chess set

I want... __ more Magic the Gathering cards __ a lightsaber __ a date __ more computers __ to work for Microsoft __ to one-up Microsoft __ to call Microsoft “Microshaft” __ to be cast in a Kevin Smith film __ Jean Gray __ Jeff Goldblume __ 7 of 9 __ Jean-Luc Picard __ Mulder __ Scully __ more friends __ 100-sided dice __ to be a wizard __ to be a superhero __ to be a physicist __ to be a historian __ to be an economist __ to be a librarian __ to be a meteorologist __ to be an astronomer __ to take over the world __ to score well on this test I like to… __ play with numbers __ play with words/sounds __ play with hazardous chemicals __ make documentaries __ read on Friday or Saturday nights __ go to the library __ browse the dictionary to learn new words __ do logic games __ put together puzzles __ program __ roleplay __ buy DVDs for their bonus materials __ work mathematical problems __ work chemical formulas __ do physics in my head __ play with Legos __ listen to NPR or AM radio __ listen to books on tape __ learn on my own I wear... __ glasses __ that I have repaired myself __ software company t-shirts

2 ©2001 www.innergeek.us

THE GEEK TEST
__ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ computer-humor t-shirts computer-related ties, underwear, etc. comic book-related ties, underwear, etc. shirts that proclaim geekhood Star Wars t-shirts only black t-shirts ugly shirts my shirt tucked into my underwear Spock Ears permanently due to plastic surgery Vampire teeth permanently due to cosmetic dentistry hi-tops a digital watch day-of-the-week underwear suspenders __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ written a regular expression parser followed comic strips online a subscription to a sci-fi or computer magazine designed a robot built a robot built a go-cart built a computer built my own network of computers designed a nuclear device of some sort built a nuclear device of some sort plotted world domination (to some extent) played Final Fantasy defeated Final Fantasy defeated all Final Fantasy games more than 3 e-mail addresses played video/computer games for 12+ hours straight been on a listserv created a listserv dated someone over the internet married someone I met over the internet exaggerated on this test to score better flat out lied on this test to score better

I play… __ Chez Geek __ chess __ word games (like boggle and scrabble) __ on my PDA __ solitaire __ 5+ times a week __ They Might Be Giants __ Devo __ Weird Al Yankovic __ Man or Astroman __ show tunes __ cartoon soundtracks __ music that nobody else listens to, ever __ no sports __ the accordion __ computer strategy games __ games via the internet __ an excessive amount of computer games __ Risk __ all the way to the end I collect… __ comic books __ superhero paraphernalia __ spoons __ calculators __ bugs __ pins __ snow globes __ neat-looking rocks __ stamps __ coins __ dirt I have also... __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ cracked software hacked into another computer system debugged a Microsoft product Beta tested for a software company corrected Intel on hardware specs altered registry files used Usenet or IRC written shareware

I know... __ C++ __ UNIX __ Lisp, Ada, CGI scripting, Pascal, or Delphi __ Java __ BASIC __ ASCII __ HTML and/or JavaScript __ Latin __ chemical symbols for 10+ elements __ the names of 3 temperature scales __ and the freezing/boiling points of each __ the difference between nuclear fission and fusion __ how to roll-step and high-step in time __ my age in binary __ how to count in hexadecimal __ the difference between octal and octane __ what RAM and ROM stand for __ who created MSDOS __ who first implemented windows on their OS __ all about Jeanine Salla __ what increasing barometric pressure means __ how to count to 31 on one hand __ how to play 7+ games with regular deck(s) of cards __ what the blue screen of death means __ that aol is the Spawn of Satan __ that Bill Gates is both God and Satan __ the names of 5+ Hobbits __ the names of 5+ dwarves from The Hobbit __ the names of 10+ Smurfs __ the names of 2+ Dragonlance characters __ how to set a telescope in polar alignment __ the value of pi (to 10 digits) __ that the new millennium started in 2001 __ what a THAC0 is __ extensive, useless trivia __ how to write 1999 in Roman numerals __ that the answer is 42 __ that I am a geek

3 ©2001 www.innergeek.us

THE GEEK TEST
SCORING Each box checked is worth one point.

If you fill in all the boxes in a section, add an extra ten points to your score.

Less than 30 points: 30 – 49 points: 50 – 79 points: 110 - 139 points: 170 – 220 points: More than 220 points:

Poser! Geek

Total Geek SuperGeek Geek God

80 – 109 points: Major Geek 140 – 169 points: UltraGeek Dysfunctional Geek

HOW YOU RANK IN GEEKNESS: To get a complete statistical analysis of all the geeks surveyed, put your name, e-mail address, and Geek Test score on the list, and you will be notified when all the data is compiled. That’s just how geeky we are.

4 ©2001 www.innergeek.us