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O
ur kids...the best that they can be.
What you should know
       about
     BULLYING.
“A person is being bullied when he or she
  is exposed, repeatedly and over time, to
    negative actions on the part of one or
  more other persons.”       Olweus, 1991
              Three Critical components:
                     • Intentional
                     • Repetition
                 • Power Differential

 Telling children to Stand Up to Bullies, could be very
          dangerous! They need an adults help!
                    Bullying is about Power…
                 (Vaillancourt, Hymel & McDougall, 2003)


Power comes in many forms…
     Physical (larger, older)
     Numbers (mobbing, scapegoating)
     Social (more popular, more competent)

Over time, the power imbalance between the bully and
  victim becomes established

Children who are victimized are powerless to stop the
  bullying on their own.
It was once thought that it was children with low self-esteem who bullied,
    but on the contrary, most bullies are reported to have a high level of
    social intelligence and use bullying as a strategy to maintain their
    status and power!
       Involvement in Bully – Victim Incidents

•   8-10% - Victims
•   8-12% - Bullies
•   1-5% - Bully-victims
•   70-80% - Witnesses

         Studies show that even the witnesses are at risk for
    depression and other emotional upset due to witnessing violent
    acts.
              Bullying Takes Many Forms
Physical Bullying – Pushing, Spitting, shoving, hitting,
kicking, threatening with a weapon, defacing property,
stealing.
Verbal Bullying – Mocking, teasing, name calling, dirty
looks, intimidation phone calls, racist, sexist,
homophobic taunts, verbal threats, coercion, extortion.
Social Bullying – Gossiping, setting up for
embarrassment, spreading rumors, exclusion from
group, inciting hatred, racist, sexist, homophobic
alienation, setting other up to take the blame, public
humiliation
Cyber Bullying – Using email, internet or text
Craig and Pepler:
Bullying as an underground activity
52 hours of videotape from 2 schools
• Over 400 episodes of bullying
• On average, once every 7 minutes on playground
• Once every 15-20 minutes in classroom
• Average bullying episode=37 seconds, but one
  lasted 37 minutes
• Teachers intervened once in every 25 incidents (4 %
  of the time)
• Peers were present about 80-85% of the episodes,
  but intervened on behalf of the victim only 11% of the
  time.
            Long Term Consequences
Victimization
•   Academic Difficulties
•   School truancy/avoidance
•   Increased absenteeism
•   Somatic complaints (e.g., headaches, stomachaches)
•   Stress-related illness, physical health problems
•   Low self-esteem
•   Depression
•   Social withdrawal/isolation
•   Social anxiety, loneliness
•   Suicide
•   Aggressive behaviour
 Long Term Consequences cont.
Bullying
•Externalizing problems
•Antisocial problem behavior
•Mental health problems
•Dating aggression
•Sexual harassment
•Arrests for child/spousal abuse
•Depression
•Anxiety
•Suicide
•Delinquency and criminality
•Moral disengagement
      WHY?


  Three possibilities
 • Psychopathology
• Part of growing up
   • Human nature
      Characteristics of Bullies and Victims

Bullies
• (up) externalizing problems & hyperactivity (e.g., Khatri et
  al., Kumpulainen et al. 1999)
• (up )antisocial & phsically aggressive behavior (e.g., Craig,
  1998)
• (down) empathy (e.g., Espelage & Mebane in press;
  Funke 2003; Roberts & Morotti, 2000; Olweus 1993, 1997)
• (down) anxiety (e.g., Craig, 1998; Owleus, 1993)
Victims
• (up) depression & anxiety (e.g., Boivin et al., 2001, Craig,
  1998; Olweus, 1993,1997; Sourander et al., 2000)
   Psychosocial adjustment and Bullying
    Generally, the psychosocial adjustment of
   bullies, victims and bully-victims tends to be
   poorer than those not involved in bullying
   (Nansel et al., 2001)
Bullying has been associated with
• Lower extraversion scores, higher neuroticism
   and psychoticism scores (Mynard & Joseph,
   1997)
• Parent ratings of conduct disorder,
   oppositional defiant disorder, attentions-deficit
   disorder and depressive disorder for about half
   of the bullies (Coolidge, DenBoar & Segal,
   2004)
   Why do people bully?

       • Child psychopathy
•The gradual social development of
           our children
  •The Nature of human beings
Moral Disengagement
      Student Attitudes and Beliefs
Perceptions of Victims
Some kids get bullied because the deserve it.                   40-71% yes
Most students who get bullied bring it on themselves            37-58% yes
If certain kids didn’t whine or give in so easily, they         58-72% yes
wouldn’t get bullied so much.
                                                                66-70% yes
Victims should fight back.
If you refuse to fight, other kids will think you’re a loser.   55-63% yes


Justifying Bullying                                             16-31% yes
Sometimes it’s okay to bully other people.
                                                                65-72% yes
Bullying gets grudges out in the open.
Getting bullied helps make people tougher.                      29-44% yes
Some kids need to be picked on just to teach them a lesson.     36-51% yes
    Causes and Contributing Factors
             to Bullying
•   Child Characteristics
•   Family Characteristics
•   School Policies & Practices
•   Media (TV & Video Games)
•   Peer Group Contributions
•   Societal and Cultural Norms
WHAT CAN PARENTS DO?
        The Role of PARENTS

If you suspect that your child is a bully or a
   victim….
SERIOUSLY CONSIDER THE POSSIBILITY AND
   SO SOMETHING
If you see children harassing one another
   inappropriately…
DO SOMETHING
NONINTERVENTION (Doing nothing) is viewed
   by children as condoning behaviour!
The Role of Parents

   And don’t ever let   Serious
     me catch you
     bullying again     Self-reflection
    you stupid idiot!
      Bullying is
        wrong!!!        Do we model
                        bullying for our
                        children?
 What parents can do for children who bully
• Do NOT call your child a bully
  (if they believe they are a bully, they’ll act like one) but
  acknowledge when their behavior is considered bullying.
• Remember that your child is learning about social behavior and
  how to get along with others from you as well as form others.
• Consider bullying as a teaching moment rather than just a
  discipline problem and use teaching opportunities effectively.
• If your child is accused of bullying at school, consider the
  possibility seriously before becoming defensive (Could it be
  true?)
• Try to work with school staff to address the issue
  collaboratively, with consistent messages from both sides. Find
  alternatives to detentions/suspensions (Works the first time or
  not at all.)
    What parents can do for children
              who bully
•   Direct and immediate, formative consequences are necessary, but what
    kind?
          Provide clear message that what they are doing is bullying and is
    unacceptable
          Quick, immediate, no-nonsense talks work better than long
          lectures
          Build awareness skills, empathy, and insights
          Inductive, other-centered discipline to increase empathy
          Provide youth with alternatives to bullying
          Teach your child appropriate (non aggressive) ways to get what
          he/she wants
          Re-channel bulling behavior into socially appropriate
          Leadership and responsibility
          Make students responsible and accountable for their behavior
          Community service
          Restituation self-discipline
          Restorative justice practices
     If the problem persists…
   despite socialization efforts…

• Consider the possibility that the bullying
  may be part of a larger problem with
  conduct, antisocial behavior and/or ADHD,
  even depression…
• Get professional help – the earlier the
  better.
  Do you suspect that your child is
         being victimized?
They may not tell you directly. Possible warning signs:
• Avoids recess/playground before, during and/or after
  school
• Arrives to school late or just at starting bell
• Appears to be alone most of the time at school
• Frequent injuries or frequent damage to clothes or
  property
• Numerous lost belongings
• Sleeping all the time (or not at all)
• Somatic complaints (headaches, stomach aches, etc.)
       What parents can do for children who are
                     victimized
• Support your child and validate his/her feelings (victimized children
  often blame themselves for their treatment)
• Plan regular communication with your child to monitor events on an
  ongoing basis
• Teach/Model assertiveness (not aggression) example:Safeteen
  (www.safeteen.ca)
• Consider the possibility that your child is a “Provocative victim” and
  teach alternative behaviors
• Document incidents, try to get the whole story
• If possible, work with the school (talk to teachers, counselors, youth
  workers, administrators)
    – Identify an adult at school who can support your child and who the child
      can trust
    – Provide a “safe haven” for your child during recess/lunch periods and
      bus trips
  What parents can do for children
        who are victimized
• If you don’t get results at the school level, don’t
  give up, contact the assistant superintendent,
  the superintendent, the school board
• If talking directly with parents of perpetrators, be
  objective and try to consider the whole picture
• Contact your parent association/access
  community support
• If child was physically attacked, contact
  police/school liaison officer
• If school interventions fail, consider switching
  schools.
Be Prepared



• Your child may not want your help
• A child who has been victimized may still
  seek affiliation with perpetrators despite
  their treatment of him/her
                Useful Websites
• Collaborative for Academic and Social and Emotional
  Learning (CASEL) www.casel.org
• Promoting Relationships and Eliminating Violence Network
  (PREVNet) www.prevnet.ca
• Blueprints www.colorado.edu/cspv/blueprints
• Centre for Social and Emotional Education www.csee.net
• Developmental Studies Center (Caring School Communities
  Project) www.devstu.org
• Teach Safe Schools www.teachsafeschools.org
• Educators for Social Responsibility (ESR)
  http://www.esrnational.org/home.htm
In conclusion, there is no conclusion to what children who are
bullied live with. They take it home with them at night. It lives
inside them and eats away at them. It never ends. So neither
should our struggle to end it.



                                            Sarah, age 17
  Information provided by:

       Shelley Hymel
    Faculty of Education

University of British Columbia

				
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