HEALTH DISCOUNTS DOCUMENT REVIEW Brochure Page 1

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					                              HEALTH DISCOUNTS DOCUMENT REVIEW



Brochure

Page 1

        Aesthetics – This should be secondary in terms of importance/relevance to UK market
        Box out – suggest make proposition more compelling - ‘and you’ll receive instant savings
         that will quickly add up to hundreds of pounds’
        30-day satisfaction – comments as per website review
        How to join – this title does not reflect the copy underneath

Page 2

        The Healthy Discounts advantage – comments as per website review
        Replace dental ‘exams’ with dental ‘check ups’
        Replace eye ‘exams’ with eye ‘tests’
        Testimonial - these tend to work better if they are more personal .. eg, provide a name
         instead of just a county/country.

Membership Form

No comments

Terms and Conditions

These are extensive and potentially a barrier to signing up. UK law states that Ts & Cs must be
available to view prior to sign up, but this does NOT have to be within the mail piece. You could just
put them on the website and make reference to where they can be found
(www.healthydiscounts.co.uk/tsandcs). You would then just need to ensure that they are sent out
with the membership paperwork (as you are already doing)

Membership Kit

Letter

        Opening sentence could be more customer focused – eg. Replace ‘our discount plan ….’ With
         ‘You can now look forward to …’
        Para 5 – make more compelling as per brochure – suggest something like ‘you’ll receive
         instant savings that will soon add up to..’
        Para 6 – makes reference to discounts and privileges …. What are the privileges other than
         the discount?
        Last para – suggest ending with a stronger CTA – something like ‘Why not book an
         appointment now and start saving’

Frequently Asked Questions
      Para 1 – makes reference to ‘Special instructions on how to use your membership in the US
       will be included in your membership kit’ – Isn’t this part of the membership kit?
      Para 1 – ‘Traveling’ should be ‘travelling’
      Para 2 – suggest rewording to ‘Which dentists and opticians can I visit’
      Sample Savings – replace ‘exam’ with ‘test’
      Sample savings – focus on hearing instead of aesthetics
      Change ‘vision exams can enhance your life’ to ‘Eye tests can enhance your life’
      Last sentence – change to ‘An eye test could save your sight’

Terms and Conditions

      Para 1 – ‘enrollment’ should be ‘enrolment’
      Cancellation and refund policy – change ‘semi-annually’ to ‘half-yearly’
      Member acknowledgements – bit confused why this specifically relates to dentists??

Direct Mail

General comment: The proposition relates to reducing the number of days lost from work due to ill
health. However, some of the copy drifts away from this, making reference to aesthetic treatments
as opposed to health treatments. I am not convinced that this is the most compelling proposition
and would suggest it may be better to focus on membership being a benefit that can be passed on to
employees as part of a CSR programme. The key benefit being that staff who feel valued by their
employers are more productive.

Perhaps something to think about…

				
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posted:8/28/2012
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