SHOE ME IN: GIRL, ARE THOSE YOUR PUMPS???
Mini movie caption - PUMP, PUMP, PUMP, PUMP ME UP
Starbopper reaches out for her swarovski star studded microphone normally stored in a mini sleek
diamond ready cabinet embossed with P Diddy’s signature. She has on one hand her custom made
Michael Jackson shimmery white glove. She sports the latest multi-coloured puffy hair swirl and the
back of her head has been trimmed to a T spritzed with Precious Vibe hairspray for extra shimmer
and sensual appledisiac scent. She’s wearing the baddest earings mailed from her Japanese jeweller
from the Bronx, New York. Her apple bottom jeans speaks louder than words and she’s cinched in
Sin City corset – in gold because her man HATES RED. She’s saving that for the day he p***es her off.
Her Christian louboutins of a bodacious 6 inch height blings heavily in pink and white gold topped off
with a Disney night blue sole. All in her mode, she has her game face on. She’s already swivelled the
last cappuccino drop in her mouth. With sheer baby pink glossy lips parted, white teeth sparkling
from a new dentist job, she is powered with energy for the morning radio show.
In perfect patois the queen of radio belts out “ ‘ear me now, this is starbopper Petra calling out
to all me pumpettes from Shoe City FM, the only station for the realest chicks…if daggers could kill a
star,….It’s a bird, it’s a plane, no wait a minute, it’s a pump, and its so fly. Go get it now, the new
biker pump at Sally’s. It’s discounted at 25% and it is a limited line for those females who want to
look sexy while being safe patrolling the streets on their motorbikes…and please don’t talk to me
about layways. You know who you are. Ere Johnny, if you is listening, make sure you ‘ave me patty
onna me desk no later than 12 noon. Right, here is Prince with Chocolate Tattoo for all me pretty
ladies. Jah Bless!!!.... At the parking lot one of Punisher’s motorbike tires just burst screeching to a
halt thanks to a tiny gold plated pump. She rubs her teeth angrily with two fingers then shouts into
the open sky “Damn I should of known you wasn’t lying about leaving that wannabe barbie on my
parking spot. As Dana, the new intern rushes in to fix the problem, she yells “ I’ll get you Petra”….
“Who runs the world, Girls” belts out from her mini player and she still hasn’t turned the engine
off…..TO BE CONTINUED
GET OUT THOSE LADY DAGGERS AND PUMPADOUR, YOU’RE HOT
Is this the decade of the shoe city or what? Stiletto pumps are going mania, globally. Every
lady wants pumps by Manolo Blahnik, Christian Louboutin, DSquared2, Kelsi, Giuseppe
Zanotti, Chinese Laundry, to name but a few. Shoe designers are reaching for the skies.
Pumps are higher, sleeker, sexier, and extremely colourful. Even the darker shades seem
brighter due to contrasting colour variations used. Now, shoe designers are jumping the
creative norm and going for explosive pumps that look nothing like the dynamics of
yesterday and appear big and strong enough to walk on the moon. For example, Beyonce
sports knock out shoes created by the maverick British designer Gareth Pugh that blur the
boundary between art and fashion in the “Who Runs The World, Girls” music video.
Between November 4th to 8th, 2011, the shoes were also among those on display in Brick
Lane, East London as part of the new exhibition by online store Javari.co.uk ‘ Shoes for
Show: the Sculptural Art of High Heels’ “an exhibition dedicated to shoes designed to be
almost totally unwearable.
According to a source at http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2057905/These-shoes-
arent-walking-The-incredible-inch-heels-sore-toes.html#ixzz1iXo1ZjWd “news of the
exhibition came in the week top shoe designer Christian Louboutin – whose en pointe
Swarovski-encrusted ballet stilettos for the ENO are also included in the exhibition – caused
a stir with comments linking high heels to the female libido.”
Louboutin reportedly said "putting your foot in a heel, you are putting yourself in a possibly
orgasmic situation", an idea that had feminists rolling their eyes and yawning.
Marshall, however, said this exhibition would not be examining Louboutin's theory: "I feel
like that's old ground," she said. "I didn't want to do that discussion."
Is this Beauty and the Beast or just beauty? You decide. Poetically it is sensual, it is beautiful.
But could a woman catch a man in these? We should take it to the streets for a test.
Other interesting sculptural pumps at the exhibition were Miss Chau’s wooden heels:
Nicholas Kirkwood’s sandal platform for Meadham Kirchoff :
Jamie Bowler’s innovative platform which was meant to be appreciated for beauty rather than
If I were to invent my own custom designed stiletto pumps it would be a 2 in 1 PUMP. The
interior pump would be of a twinkling silver and white starry appeal. The exterior pump
housing the interior pump, would be a rainbow blazoned see-through pump where the walls
could be opened up with just a pull of a secretive string. Thanks to its magnetic essence, the
walls could then be neatly tucked under the sole of the interior pump out of sight made for a
night out with the girls.
I bet soon if you just look around the corner you will find your regular Alice donning it like it
was the year 2020. Are we going Gaga? Looks like that is where we are headed looking into
the future. Let us trace our steps to where the idea first began:
“After their use in Ancient Greece for raising the height of important characters in the Greek
theatre and their similar use by high-born prostitutes or courtesans in Venice in the 16th
Century, platform shoes are thought to have been worn in Europe in the 18th century to avoid
the muck of urban streets. Of the same practical origins are Japanese geta. There may also be
a connection to the buskins of Ancient Rome, which frequently had very thick soles to give
added height to the wearer. In ancient China men wore black boots with very thick sole made
from layers of white clothes, this style of boots are often worn today on stage for Peking
opera. During the Qing dynasty, aristocrat Manchu women wore a form of platform shoe
similar to 16th century Venetian chopine.
Platforms also referred to as Disco Boots exploded onto the fashion scene in the 1960’s to
1980s. As the fad progressed, manufacturers like Candie's stretched the envelope of what was
considered too outrageous to wear, while others, like Famolare and Cherokee of California,
introduced "comfort" platforms, designed to combine the added height of platforms with the
support and comfort of sneakers, or even orthopedic shoes, and by the time the fad finally
fizzled in the late 1980s, girls and women of all ages were wearing them. It may also be a by-
product of this fad that Scandinavian clogs, which were considered rather outrageous
themselves in the late 1960s and early 1970s, had become "classic" by the 1980s.
Vivienne Westwood, the UK fashion designer, re-introduced the high heeled platform shoe
into high-fashion in the early 1990s; it was while wearing a pair with five inch platforms and
nine inch heels that the super model, Naomi Campbell, took a tumble on the catwalk or
runway at a fashion show.
However they did not catch on quickly and platform shoes only began to resurface in
mainstream fashion in the late 1990s, thanks in part to the UK band the Spice Girls, whose
members were known for performing in large shoes.
The United Kingdom (and European) experience of platform shoes was somewhat different
from that of the United States. Britain generally is not as concerned with women's feet
appearing as small as possible; the long pointed shoes of the early 2000s, that give an
elongated look to the foot, were and are still more popular in the US than in the UK.
Platform shoes took off in a very big way amongst most age groups and classes of UK men
and women in the 1970s. Even today men wear shoes which increase their height. Such shoes
are called elevator shoes. Whilst wedge heels were popular on platforms in the summer, high
thick separate heeled platform boots and shoes were 'all the rage'. Many of the shoe styles
were recycled 1940s and early 1950s styles, but both shoes and boots were often in garish
combinations of bright colours.
Buffalo Boots is a brand whose platform models were popular, especially in Europe (notably
Germany and Scandinavia), from the mid 1990s to the early 2000s.”
“All high heels counter the natural functionality of the foot, which can create skeletal and
muscular problems if they are worn excessively. Stiletto heels are no exception. Despite their
impracticality, however, their popularity remains undiminished – as Terry DeHavilland (UK
shoe designer) has said, "people say they're bad for the feet but they're good for the mind.
What's more important?"
Stiletto heels concentrate a large amount of force into a small area. The great pressure under
such a heel (greater than that under the feet of an elephant) can cause damage to carpets and
floors. The stiletto heel will also sink into soft ground, making it impractical for outdoor wear
on grass” (refer to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Platform_shoe).
Sorry, I can peruse pumps all day long into next week but would not wear me a pump anyday
unless I really had to like if out to a social event. I love my legs and would not want to see a
podiatrist in the near future but go ahead with your bad selves and strut your stuff for those
who can. Kudos to America’s radio and live tv show-talk host Wendy Williams for her
shows’ Shoe Cam. The camera trails the guests’ shoes highlighting it long enough for
viewers at home to get a good look. Absolutely delicious!
This is your girl, **Starbopper**, logging out. xox
For more information go to: www.javari.co.uk/shoesforshow
http://stores.ebay.co.uk/Shoesinstyle4less/Kelsi-Dagger-/_i.html?_fsub=436464219 for killer