Discipline

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					Effective Parenting
Practices

Achieving Self-Discipline
Discipline vs. Punishment
• “Discipline” – derived from Latin word “discere” (to learn)
• Discipline involves providing examples, guidance,
  encouragement, and rules so that children eventually
  learn acceptable behaviour and the ways of society
Discipline vs. Punishment
• Punishment is reactive – a penalty imposed
  for wrongdoing
• Logic – “If we hurt the child she/he will think
  twice about misbehaving”
• Can be effective in the short term –
  but motivation is external
• Children learn that parents will hurt them if
  they don’t follow the rules, but they don’t
  learn why those rules exist
Discipline vs. Punishment
• Discipline helps teach the difference between right and
  wrong
• Helps children learn the consequences of their actions
• Children begin to internalize the information so they can
  learn to behave appropriately in future
• They learn self-discipline (the ability to do what is
  necessary or sensible without needing to be urged by
  somebody else)
Effective Techniques for Parents and Caregivers
1. Distract and redirect:
• Offer an acceptable alternative
• Examples:
   – If a baby grabs hair…
   – If a child insists on watching
     television…
   – If a child wants to play with the
     same toy as another child…
Effective Techniques for Parents and Caregivers
  2. Set limits:
  • Clearly explain boundaries and expectations
  • e.g. “You must wear your helmet every time you
    ride your bike.”
  • Point out successes: “You remembered to wear
    your helmet – that’s great!”
  • Don't argue about the rules; it’s OK to say
    “I am not going to argue with you about that”
Effective Techniques for Parents and Caregivers

               3. Establish routines:
               • Children find comfort in knowing
                 what to expect
               • e.g. Every night before bed we take
                 a bath, brush our teach and read a
                 story
Effective Techniques for Parents and Caregivers
 4. Provide transition time:
 • Give warning before ending an activity
 • e.g. “In ten minutes we will have to clean up these
   toys and have dinner”
Effective Techniques for Parents and Caregivers

 5. Teach and train:
 • Children need to learn
   essential skills
 • How will you teach…
   – Manners?
   – Proper hygiene?
   – School success?
   – Internet safety?
Effective Techniques for Parents and Caregivers

 6. Give Encouragement:
 • Gives children confidence
   repeat positive behaviour
 • “I like the way you tried to put
   your shoes on all by
   yourself!”
 • “That’s a good place to put
   your blocks!”
Effective Techniques for Parents and Caregivers

 7. Offer Choices:
 • Helps them accept responsibility
 • Gives child a measure of control
 • Limit choices for young children
    – Instead of…“What do you want to wear today?“
    – Say… “Do you want to wear your red pants or
      your blue pants?”
Effective Techniques for Parents and Caregivers
  8. Logical Consequences:
  • Consequences should relate to the behaviour
  • If a child’s shoes get muddy…
  • If a child throws his toy across the room…
  • If a child refuses to put his winter hat on before
    going to the park…
  • If a child leaves his bike on the driveway…
9. Time-in:
• An act of inclusion
• When child misbehaves, parents calmly discuss
  child’s feelings and teaches child problem solving
• Shows child parent loves them and cares
Effective Techniques for Parents and Caregivers
10. Time-out:
• Removes child from problem situation
• Gives time to calm down and rethink behaviour
• 1 minute per year of age, up to 5 min.
• 1,2,3, MAGIC! – Begin counting to 3 when child
  misbehaves. Child receives time out if child does not
  cooperate.
Effective Techniques for Parents and Caregivers

Offer love and comfort after dealing with
  misbehaviour:
• Reinforce that misbehaviour is unacceptable
• Never tell a child they are “bad”
• Children need to know they are still loved
• Giving the silent treatment, displaying continued
  anger show disapproval for child – not behaviour

				
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