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It was Jarnail
Singh ji’s
wedding
anniversary
when he
woke up the
sleeping
giant.
Getting married does not
come in the way to
success
As things stand today
There are “Arranged” Marriages
Or
Fall in Love resulting in a Marriage
Marriage ! Why ?
Reasons could be :
To legitimize a relationship
To have kids
To have a stable family unit
To share wealth
To Enjoy etc. etc.
You may say Marriage is not for the JAWANI.
It is an investment for companionship in the Old
Age. When everyone around you is too busy with
their own lives and you are left out. You then need
someone to call your own.
Some Fundamentals
Awgwhw kU qRwiG ,
ipCw Pyir n muhfVw ]
(1096-12, mwrU, mÚ 5)
aagaahaa koo taraagh
pichhaa fayr na muhadrhaa.
Look ahead; don't turn your face backwards.
When men feel
LONELY, they take to
Drinking.
When women feel
LONELY they weep.
“The most terrible poverty
is loneliness and the feeling
of being
unloved – unwanted.”
“There is more hunger in the world
for Love and Appreciation than for
bread.”
GET INSURED
Before it is toooooo late
Arranged Marriages
Generally start from a Pandit Ji making a
kundali
Intelligent people will
NOT be “Matching Horoscopes”
You must list down few important
characteristics you expect your
spouse to have.
Characteristics
What Girls want ! What Boys want !
Characteristics (eg)
What Girls want ! What Boys want !
Handsome Very Fair
Tall Beautiful
Security Elegant
Rich Smart
Fancy Car Career
Bungalow Manage House
Separate House Manage Children
Separate Business Manage In-laws
No Khit-Pit from In laws Great Sex
Some are features of the BODY ! A body
that will wither away with passing time.
Some are features of the BODY ! A body
that will wither away with passing time.
First Miss India (held in the year 1949) Pramila is now 90 Years old
You would have old Photographs of
your parents
How Handsome was your Dad !
How Beautiful your mother looked !
Gurbani paints a picture of Old Age for us
(659-12, soriT, Bgq BIKn jI)
nYnhu nIru bhY qnu Kinw Bey kys duD vwnI ]
nainhu neer bahai tan kheenaa bha-ay kays duDh vaanee.
Tears well up in my eyes, my body has become weak,
and my hair has become milky-white.
rUDw kMTu sbdu nhI aucrY Ab ikAw krih prwnI ]1]
rooDhaa kanth sabad nahee uchrai ab ki-aa karahi paraanee. ||1||
My throat is tight, and I cannot utter even one word; what can I do now?
I am a mere mortal. ||1||
Ang 138-2 (Guru Nanak Dev Ji)
10 yrs Childhood
20 Youth
30 Handsome / beautiful
40 Fully Grown
50 Down Hill starts
60 Old age
70 Intellectual wastage
80 Inability to perform
90 Bed ridden
100 Bye Bye – Ashes in some river !!
Some are features that are a
function of MONEY!
(141-16, mwJ, mÚ 4)
rwjy rXiq iskdwr koie n rhsIE ]
raajay ra-yat sikdaar ko-ay na rahsee-o.
Neither the kings, nor their subjects, nor the leaders shall remain.
ht ptx bwjwr hukmI FhsIE ]
hat patan baajaar hukmee dhahsee-o.
Mohenjodaro / Roman Empire / British Empire / Gujarat / Sunami / etc.
The shops, the cities and the streets shall eventually disintegrate, by the
Hukam of Guru jee’s Command.
pky bMk duAwr mUrKu jwxY Awpxy ]
pakay bank du-aar moorakh jaanai aapnay.
Those solid and beautiful mansions-the fools think that they belong to them.
drib Bry BMfwr rIqy ieik Kxy ]
darab bharay bhandaar reetay ik khanay.
The treasure-houses, filled with wealth, shall be emptied out in an instant.
Stock Markets totally crashed in Oct 2008 and now 2011
Would it be wise
to base our lists
on things that are
NOT permanent ??
Let us try another way!
THE GURBANI WAY !!
BE WISE !!
IT IS YOUR ONE LIFE
DON’T GAMBLE IT AWAY
You are a parha-likha baccha
Gurbani also warns you !
(866-12, goNf, mÚ 5)
jUAY jnmu n kbhU hwir ]
joo-ai janam na kabhoo haar.
Do not lose your life in the gamble.
Human Body
Body : What we see
Mun : What are our Desires
Chitt : What thoughts are in our mind
You must try to match
things at the level of the
MUN & CHITT
Characteristics
What both SHOULD want in each other !
Contentment
Humility
Compassion
Understanding
Caring Attitude
Sweet Speaking
No criticism
Forgiveness
TRUTHFULLNESS
Fear of God
Similar such things ….
Yes !!
But how can one judge
it from far ?
RELIGION could help
Let us look at the Sikh Philosophy
How was the World Created ?
1035-9
Who is God / Akal Purakh ?
UNDERSTANDING GOD By Amardeep Singh
e.g. Trinity of Hindu Philosophy
ONE GOD (Creator) G - Generator (Brahma)
O - Operator (Vishnu)
D - Destroyer (Shiva)
However “1” in Sikh Philosophy rejects the Trinity concept
Generates Operates Destroys
Creation
NIRGUN
Nature
SARGUN NIVRTTI MARG
Without Attributes
With Attributes (Non distinguishable) Infra-
(Distinguishable) The Five Elements PRAVRTTI MARG Atomic structure of the five
pMj qq Elements
Earth Water Fire Air Ether Smell Taste Form Touch Sound
Tamo (Tamasic or Tamas) – Inertia, Darkness
Actions of Nature Rajo (Rajasic or Rajas) - Vibrancy
Sato (Satvic or Sattva) – Luminosity, Pure, Light
Creation
Sun Creation of Waheguru ji
Moon Creation of Waheguru ji
Trees Creation of Waheguru ji
Flowers Creation of Waheguru ji
Cow mata Creation of Waheguru ji
Snakes Creation of Waheguru ji
Water Creation of Waheguru ji
…….. (113-12, mwJ, mÚ 3)
……… sB mih Awip rihAw BrpUir ]
sabh meh aap rahi-aa bharpoor.
You Yourself are totally pervading amongst all.
Hindu Gods !!
Brahma Creation of Waheguru ji
Vishnu Creation of Waheguru ji
Mahesh Creation of Waheguru ji
(754-16, sUhI, mÚ 3)
kwieAw Amdir bRhmw ibsnu mhysw
sB Epiq ijqu sMswrw ]
kaa-i-aa andar barahmaa bisan mahaysaa
sabh opat jit sansaaraa.
Within the body, are Brahma, Vishnu and Shiva, from whom the whole
world emanated.
(The process of a birth of a cell, nourishment of the cell and death of
the cell – all 3 functions are happening : Like a fool we are searching
outside!)
Sikhs
DO NOT
worship the creation
Sikhs worship the
CREATOR – AKAL PURAKH
Awid scu jugwid scu ]
hY BI scu nwnk hosI BI scu
He was in the beginning; He is through all ages,
He shall be the One who lives for ever.
(62-11, isrIrwgu, mÚ 1)
schu ErY sBu ko
aupir scu Awcwru ]5]
sachahu orai sabh ko
upar sach aachaar. ||5||
Truth is higher than everything;
but higher still is truthful living. ||5||
Compatibility Indicators
Spiritual Factors : Spiritual Quotient (SQ)
Approach : Scientific or Ritualistic
Daily Get up time ?
Jupji Sahib at least before breakfast ?
Rehras Sahib before dinner ?
All members at Dinner Table ?
Kirtan from PTC / ETC / MH1 etc. ?
View points
-about AMRIT
-about Guru Maharaj’s Prakash at Home
-Sahej Path
Compatibility Indicators
Physical Factors
Sikhi Swaroop – Ok / Alterable
Health Status (HIV) / Genetic / Hormonal disorders
Emotional Factors : (EQ)
Stayed in Hostels, Travelled alone etc.
(Sabko meet hum aapen kina ?)
Intelligence Factors : (IQ)
Do not mistake that a 80% and a 50% will make a
good match. Toppers should marry Toppers !
ONE GOD (Creator)
Superficially married to each other, but
in effect married to AKAL PURAKH
No difference between MY money and YOUR money.
It is AKAL PURAKH’s blessing : Read Sukhmani Sahib – Astpadi 6 ijh pRswid
Guru jee was to create this
Swaroop for us
So he put his foot down earlier
If you do not have time to read
1430 pages of
Guru Granth Sahib Jee
obviously
you will want a
Quick n Easy solutions
That is when you are
attracted to DERAS
They put all kind of Mirch-Masala and dish out what
we, as a sikh could ourselves read from
Sri Guru Granth Sahib.
What is PUJA for a Sikh?
(1048-10, mwrU, mÚ 3)
hir nwmu cyqw Avru n pUjw ]
har naam chaytaa , avar na poojaa.
I remember Guru jee’s Name, and no other at all.
eyko syvI Avru n dUjw ]
ayko sayvee , avar na doojaa.
I serve the One Guru jee, and no other at all.
Formula for a HAPPY Marriage
(722-7, iqlµg, mÚ 1)
BY kIAw dyih slweIAw nYxI Bwv kw kir sIgwro ]
bhai kee-aa deh salaa-ee-aa nainee bhaav kaa kar seegaaro.
Apply the Fear of God as the maascara to adorn your eyes, and make the
Love of Guru jee your ornament.
qw sohwgix jwxIAY lwgI jw shu Dry ipAwro ]1]
taa sohagan jaanee-ai laagee jaa saho Dharay pi-aaro. ||1||
Then, you shall be known as a devoted and committed soul-bride, when you
enshrine love for your Husband Guru jee. ||1||
The best policy should be
HUSBAND SAYS. WIFE AGREES,
WIFE SAYS, HUSBAND AGREES
Don’t
Gamble
away
this life
of yours
Some Parents too
Gamble with your life
Be smart.
Be wise.
Let this not happen
(1158-3, BYrau, Bgq kbIr jI)
kih kbIr ikCu gunu bIcwir ]
kahi kabeer kichh gun beechaar.
Says Kabeer, reflect on values
cly juAwrI duie hQ Jwir ]4]2]
chalay ju-aaree du-ay hath jhaar. ||4||2||
In the end, the gambler shall depart empty-handed. ||4||2||
TO SUMMARIZE
Sikhism is the
Only Universal Religion (30+6)
Is for the “Thinking” person
Simplest
Easiest
Most Convenient
Neat and Clean
Practically Least discrimination for females.
(Theoretically ZERO)
Must Marry a Sikh !!
At least
The Direction is the
same.
The Destination is
the same.
The Philosophy is
the same.
Marriage
The Prophet - By Khalil Gibran
Let there be spaces in your togetherness,
Love one another but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Sing and dance together and be joyous,
but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with
the same music.
Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping.
And stand together, yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
vwihgurU
jI kw Kwlsw
vwihgurU
jI kI Piqh ]
Waheguru
Ji Ka Khalsa,
Waheguru
Ji Ki Fateh
