U N I V E R S I T Y O F C A L G A R Y
V O L U M E 4 8 | I S S U E N O . 3 2 | M A R C H 1 3 | 2 0 0 8
SYNCHRONIZED SWIMMING SPORTS STORY 14
THE UNIVERSITY OF CALGARY GAUNTLET | VOLUME 48 | ISSUE NO. 32 | MARCH 13 | 2008
photo to the editor
“Masouleh” by Nooshin Esmaeili
ere is a picture I took while in the Middle East.
The village is Masouleh. It was founded in
the th century ad and its current popula-
tion is estimated to be around . It’s , meters
above sea level in the Alborz mountain range, near
the southern coast of the Caspian Sea north of Iran.
Masoulehan architecture is unique. The buildings have
been built into the mountain and are interconnected.
Courtyards and roofs both serve as pedestrian areas
similar to streets motor vehicles are not allowed to
enter. In Masouleh, “the yard of the above building
is the roof of the below building.”
Anyone can submit an original photo to the editor. Drop off your
high-resolution photo along with your name, contact information
and a brief description including type of camera (not exceeding
30 words) to room 319 MacEwan Student Centre or email
Physics are everywhere! photo²
news page 5 photo page 22
ap editor Ben Hoffman delves into the world of physics, news assistant What’s square, photogenic, submitted by volunteers and totally awesome? This
Sarelle Azuelos delves into round two of our Rez Rot news feature and writer/ week’s special super-dee-dooper photo section, where the length equals the width!
photographer extraordinaire Daniel Pagan discusses the ﬁght for wheat farmers to
choose their own price for their product.
A little bit of everything!
entertainment page 22
Zeitgeist takes one right in the face School may be winding down, but Entertainment is here, as always, with a little of
opinions page 11
something for everyone. Theatre previews? Movie reviews? An exploration of the
Yeah, and you know Zeitgeist loves it, all that cream and chocolate. This week, we mix tape by intrepid boy reporter “Young” Jordyn Marcellus? You betcha! Also,
take a bite into Z-Day and, well, pie. Or Pi. Or however those engineers spell it. Oh Spun.
yes, we at Gauntlet Opinions certainly do love our pie!
sports page 14
News: News writer Kris Schmidt delves into tolerance at the U of C.
Synchronized synchronized swimming swimming feature feature on on page page
14 14. Also also, check check out out the the last last of of the the Dinos Dinos Opinions: Our Production Editor goes on a rant about the Church! Yeah!
results results for for the the season season. Synchronized synchronized!
editorial and letters
China under the microscope March 13 2008
Editor-in-Chief: Chris Tait 220-7752
News Editor: Katy Anderson 220-4318
idja hear the one about passed before word of the outrage
China, Björk and the escaped China via the Internet. The Entertainment: Ryan Pike 220-4376
Dalai Lama? Chinese government’s control over
In the face of increased inter- information is a fairly ongoing issue Sports: Amanda Hu 220-4376
national scrutiny leading up to in the international community and
the Summer Olympics in has been more embarrassing than Opinions: Ændrew Rininsland 220-4376
Beijing, the Chinese government anything for all parties involved. A
is working to hide any sore issues typical example is China’s censor- Features: Jon Roe 220-4376
which might result in international ship of Google, which has agreed
pressure following the games. The to filter search results in order to Photography: Geoff MacIntosh 220-4376
reaction to Björk’s Fri., Mar. access the vast Chinese market.
concert—that ended with the song Exactly what the Chinese govern- Production: Christian Louden 220-4376
“Declare Independence” and chants ment will do once the hoards of for-
of “Tibet”—showcased three of the eign journalists invade the country Illustrations: Paul Baker 220-4376
major ones: government control of for the games this summer remains
the media, government suppression to be seen. News Assistant: Sarelle Azuelos 220-4318
of speech and, of course, that whole This also isn’t the first time the
damn Tibet issue. Olympic Games have taken place Escapes And Pursuits: Jordyn Marcellus 220-4376
According to a Mar. Reuters in a country with a less-than-awe-
article, Björk’s performance has some human rights record. The Academic Probation: Ben Hoffman, Garth Paulson, and
Kyle Francis 220-4376
angered the Chinese government Games in Berlin under the email@example.com
and it’s likely future performers will Nazi regime were surrounded
Three Lines Free: Cam Cotton-O’Brien 220-4376
be screened far more thoroughly. with controversy regarding Hitler’s that country’s consumer base. try to which most people still joke firstname.lastname@example.org
It’s also likely Ms. Björk will never treatment of Jewish athletes, while Everybody knows that China about sending their worst enemies,
Business Manager: Evelyn Cone 220-7380
perform in China again. This is an the Moscow Olympics were isn’t exactly down with the Bob the majority of western businesses email@example.com
unfortunate development, especially boycotted by a large number of Geldof crowd and most take are absolutely terrified of offending
Advertising Manager: John Harbidge 220-7751
at a time when China is apparently countries against the aggressive it as a given that routine abuses the sleeping giant and thus prevent- firstname.lastname@example.org
starting to loosen its controls on live nature of the Soviet Union. In do occur. However, nobody’s ing future business.
Graphic Artist: Ken Clarke 220-7755
acts by foreign artists. China has fact, an alternative series of games willing to call China on their shit, If China’s human rights policies email@example.com
never exactly been benign about were staged by the United States whether it be censoring foreign don’t evolve by the time its popula-
Network Manager: Ben Li
the whole Tibet thing—Sonic during the latter as a result of this performers, messing with one of tion is a full-fledged industrialized
Youth had their concert last year boycott. the most fundamental Internet market, we have to do some serious Contributors
Eric Au, Todd Andre, Andrew Barbero, Laura Bennett,
attended by no less than mem- What differs with the Beijing technologies or, yes, even playing soul-searching and ask ourselves, do Susan Cardwell, Nooshin Esmaeili, Lindsay Goodwin,
bers of the Ministry of Culture after Olympics, however, is the excep- Supreme Unquestioned Ruler in we really want to do business with Johanna Hung, Olivia Komorowski, Martin Lussier, Derek
Neumeier, Daniel J. Pagan, Stewart Pallard, Chris Pedersen,
they learned the group had played tional willingness of business and a smaller country they probably a country that bans people just for Leya Russell, Kris Schmidt, Joyce Wong, Darren Young
at free-Tibet-style events. national interests to ignore the have no real right to. As it stands, repeatedly shouting the name of one
Another interesting aspect of the dismal record of Chinese human I’ve probably destroyed my abil- of its territories? Todd Andre and Kris Schmidt, for writing two news
story is how long it took to reach the rights abuses due to China’s sheer ity to ever travel to China merely stories that made the online edition. Big ups!
world media. A Mar. Times Online size and the fact that everyone and by writing that last sentence. Yet, Ændrew Rininsland Furor Arma Ministrat
article mentions how several days their mother wishes to trade with despite the fact that this is a coun- Opinions Editor Room 319, MacEwan Students’ Centre
University of Calgary
2500 University Drive, NW
Calgary, AB T2N 1N4
University athletics should be funded by university General inquires: 220-7750
The Gauntlet is the ofﬁcial student newspaper of the University
of Calgary, published most Thursdays throughout the year by the
Gauntlet Publications Society, an autonomous, incorporated body.
When a university’s athletic pro- tier schools, have two of the most satisfied with the current level of repute of our school. By achieving Membership in the society is open to undergraduate students at the U
of C, but all members of the university community are encouraged to
grams do well, it not only reflects decorated programs in Canadian funding at the U of C. success in our sports teams, we not contribute. Opinions contained herein are those of individual writers,
and do not necessarily represent the views of the entire Gauntlet
well on the student athletes, but on Interuniversity Sport. The U of C’s central administra- only raise the value of our degrees, staff. Editorials are chosen by a majority of the editorial board.
The Gauntlet is a forum open to all U of C students but may refuse
the campus community as a whole. The third tier is where the tion has taken a step in the right by both increased positive name any submission judged to be racist, sexist, homophobic, libelous,
or containing attacks of a strictly personal nature. We reserve the
Calgary is the fifth-largest city in University of Winnipeg fits in, a direction by hinting that they might recognition and by strengthening right to edit for brevity. Grievances regarding the Gauntlet follow
a three-step process which requires written decisions from the
Canada and there’s no reason why school that only offers its athletes increase funding to the women’s the campus community through Editor, the GPS Board of Directors, and the Ombudsboard. The
complete Grievance Policy is online at: http://gauntlet.ucalgary.ca.
its university—and their sports men’s and women’s basketball and hockey team if they are accepted getting more students out to games. The Gauntlet is printed on recycled paper and uses broken lense-
based ink. We urge you to recycle/viciously drop the Gauntlet.
teams—shouldn’t also be in the top volleyball. back into the CIS in . Successful athletics helps combat the
five. There are a number of ways The U of C is a tier-two school, Not only do the Dinos have a lack of “engagement”—a buzzword Letter Policy
Letters must be typed, double-spaced and received by Monday at
athletic teams succeed, but one that and is largely student-funded. motivated leader to drive them constantly rolling off the tongues of 4 p.m., and must include the author’s name, student ID number,
telephone number and signature. Letters will not be printed if
cannot be denied is funding. Approximately per cent of funds with Boyles, but with a little extra university administration—which they include attacks of a strictly personal nature, statements that
discriminate on the basis of race, sex, or sexual orientation, or
It is hard to compare funding are provided by students through support—that should come from can only be positive thing for our libellous or defamatory material. All letters should be addressed
to “Editor, the Gauntlet,” and be no longer than 300 words. The
structures for university athletic a levy, leaving per cent to be administration and not directly from commuter school. Gauntlet retains the right to edit submissions. Letters can be
delivered or mailed to the Gauntlet ofﬁce, Room 319 MacEwan
programs throughout Canada due split between administration, self- students—we could see our teams Student Centre, or sent by e-mail to firstname.lastname@example.org.
to widely different models and types generated funding such as games, reach the level of UBC, raising the Katy Anderson The Cover
of programs offered. Some schools programs like summer camps and News Editor photograph by Amanda Hu, design by Geoff MacIntosh
are mostly funded by students, oth- sponsorship from alumni or outside
ers by their central administration,
some by outside sources, and yet
The U of C has just announced
Editor, the Gauntlet
others have a combination of the they will keep women’s volleyball
More simply, Canada’s schools
coach Kevin Boyles on as their
interim sports director for the next
Thanks for the opportunity!
can be broken down into three year. Boyles comes from a program
tiers. In the first tier are two of the
U of C’s closest rivals. the
that has had seven top four national
finishes in a row, and is looking to
Editor, the Gauntlet,
I would like to thank the
University of British Columbia
and the University of Alberta.
raise all Dinos teams to the same
calibre. He has publicly said that
University of Calgary’s depart-
ment of electrical and computer
At UBC, funding is closely split funding is an issue at the U of C, engineering, particularly depart- In the Mar. copy of the
between the student levy and although noting that the U of C’s ment head Dr. Abu Sesay, for the Gauntlet, University of British
central administration—they have teams did extremely well this year, amazing opportunity of researching Columbia men’s Thunderbirds
the largest endowment of any despite the funding hurdles. at your institution. basketball coach Kevin Hanson
Canadian university—as well as Kinesiology dean Wayne Giles was incorrectly quoted due
strong alumni support. Although noted he doesn’t have a great Dr. Yousef I. Y. Daradkeh to a typographic mistake. We
it cannot be entirely attributed to comparative model—he’s working Post-Doctoral Research Fellow apologize for this error.
funding, UBC and U of A, both top- on developing one now—but isn’t from Jordan
news GAUNTLET MARCH 13.08 5
Editor: Katy Anderson—email@example.com
Shining light on quantum mechanics
U of C physicists explore the future of computers...with lasers!
Ben Hoffman proposals, quantum memory is very impor-
AP Editor tant.”
“As soon as we cross this boundary from
hile the phrase “quantum macroscopic to microscopic, from large to
mechanics” alone invokes a small, our whole intuition and experience
panic reaction in nearly any- will become useless,” he said.
one who hears it, it’s a surefi re thing an Lvovsky explained just how unruly the
entire article about it will be questionably little smidgens of light can actually be—so
all-encompassing. There’s a stigma attached hard a competing group researching the
to the remarkably tiny, remarkably ineffable same thing actually gave up.
motes of matter-slash-energy-slash-non- “It’s like, suddenly you would come to
sense—the quanta from which quantum a soccer game and discover that the ball
theory derives its name—that their coun- goes through two goals at the same time,
ter-intuitive nature makes them solely the or behaves differently just because the audi-
domain of chess-grinding, basement-dwell- ence is watching,” he said. “The quantum
ing math enthusiasts. While there’s certainly world is like this. It’s better, though we
no lack of math-love and more than likely aren’t there yet, to prepare ourselves for
at least one chessboard in the black-walled this future and develop the primitives of
basement laser lab of Canada Research Chair quantum information.”
in Experimental Quantum Information and The question, then, is how to make
U of C professor Dr. Alex Lvovsky, the man something stay still that has no clear con-
himself speculates that the heady children cept of what staying still is. It is a question
of Heisenberg and Schrödinger matter more that Lvovsky, Figueroa and the rest of the
to us than we know. The proof, he assures, group feel they have found at least a partial
Johanna Hung/the Gauntlet
is in the processor. answer for.
“Our computers get faster because they Lvovsky rear with his team of super-physicists. “If you think about memory, you think
get smaller,” Dr. Lvovsky said, glancing about something that is static,” said
thoughtfully at his desktop PC and pausing. have to start dealing with elementary particles is encoded in the quantum properties Figueroa. “Light is anything but static—I
“Well, not the computers themselves, but the as carriers of information and elementary of whatever we’re sending—in this case, mean, the speed of light. Another part of
individual transistors, they get smaller and, particles are governed by totally different photons. Since they have these quantum our experiment has been learning to address
in fact, they get exponentially smaller, by a laws of physics.” properties, they are very fragile. If you and manipulate atoms. The good thing about
factor of two every couple of years.” Lvovsky’s group has been in the news send it through a normal fiber-optic, the atoms is that they can actually stay put. That’s
Lvovsky was referencing an empirical recently for researching these different properties will disappear. Then, we have to why we combine these technologies. Then,
computer science result called “Moore’s laws and their repercussions. His group, think about the analogy of the repeater in we can start at some point with informa-
Law,” which has accurately predicted which studies the technology tion in photons and get the same
“After ﬁnishing, we ended up with
how fast our computers will be since the of the quantum computer—the information in the atoms, and be
mid-’s. Although technical in statement, technology that will replace our able to release it.”
the law can be roughly viewed as “how much own once Moore has led us as far Though it seems like quantum
more badass computer games get over time,”
or “how much more realistically pervy Uncle
as he can—has recently performed
a groundbreaking proof-of-prin-
more questions than answers. For memory is in sight, there’s still
much to do before a full-blown
Jack’s thin moustache looks in the latest Pixar
movie,” and although it seems intuitive that
ciple experiment demonstrating
that one type of this new, strange
scientists, this fuels them.” quantum computer lands on our
desks. If we use a process similar
the law will continue to yield successively information can be rassled into to our current one, there’s still
better anthropomorphic animal movies to holding still for a few microsec- - Eden Figueroa, the processor—far more compli-
further entertain and numb our children, it
also predicts some disastrous results.
onds: quantum memory.
“One of our goals is to trans-
Quantam Information Science PhD student cated—to worry about. For the
moment though, Lvovsky and
“The question is, what happens if the trend port information from one Figueroa are content to revel in
continues like this for another ten or twenty place to another,” said PhD student Eden our normal fiber-optic technolo gy to be able their success.
years?” asked Lvovsky. “The line we extrapo- Figueroa, whose thesis research is on the to send the information encoded through a “After finishing, we ended up with more
late will get to the size of the individual atom. experiment in question. “The problem is, long distance. There are several theoretical questions than answers,” said Figueroa.
Then we really get in trouble, because we we want to do it using information that proposals on how to [do this]. For those “For scientists, this fuels them.”
Rent to increase in married residences
Sarelle Azuelos Association’s proposition of a Dunsdon explained that even with students in Calgary right now.” family housing are students and
News Assistant million five-year residence rehabili- the increase, rent was still equal or Graduate student Mostafa Galal they get money from a source that’s
tation and renewal plan. While the below market value. lives in family housing and believes limited.”
Residence students can look board approved the association’s plan “I think students across the the increase is unfair to current He explained the majority of grad
forward to waterproof roofs, new to go to the province for funding, rent city of Calgary, regardless of what residents. students work full-time on campus
locks and upgraded kitchens in Fall will still be increased to cover interest institution they’re going to, are “They’re asking again for an and live off of research grants and
. payments. challenged by the high cost of living increase of about , so it’s scholarships. These scholarships
The board of governors recently University of Calgary student in this city,” explained Dunsdon. per cent,” said Galal. “Most of the aren’t increasing with rent at an
passed the Residence Students’ services assistant vice-president Jim “That’s just a very real issue for all tenants in the University of Calgary see REZ, page
If you could store any piece of information on a proton, what would it be and why? campus quips
“The answer is “I would store pi.” “The multi-dimen- “My memory,
immortality. Why? – Michael Heney, sional coordinates because it deﬁnes
It’s self-explana- third-year history of home.” me.”
tory.” – Alex James, – Soﬁa Lopez,
– Neal Austin, alumni environ- second-year psy-
fourth-year bio- mental science chology
Interviews: Stewart Pallard Photographs: Amanda Hu
6 MARCH 13.08 GAUNTLET NEWS
Enviropalooza: talkin’ tarsands
Jon Roe “Waiting for industry to produce
Features Editor all of the developments might be
waiting too long,” Ebner added.
lberta’s oilsands occupy Panelist Preston McEachern,
an area slightly smaller head of science in the Oilsands
than the state of Florida. Environmental Management
However, only a small percentage division with Alberta Environment,
of the , square kilometres noted that the government doesn’t
of oilsands—around , square promote any single technology but
kilometres—is currently developed, have instead created targets and
but even that small percentage caps for greenhouse gas emis-
has far-ranging environmental sions.
impacts. The oilsands are projected to
The issues surrounding the become the single largest contribu-
production and use of Alberta’s tor of greenhouse gases in Canada,
economic backbone and environ- accounting for approximately four
mental black eye were discussed at per cent of all emissions accord-
a Wed., Mar. panel, part of the ing to McEachern. That share is
University of Calgary Students’ expected to grow as development
Union’s Enviropalooza Week of the oilsands continues.
focusing on oilsands awareness. “We’re on track to go to six per
Of the resource that is recover- cent,” said Maynard. “[But] I con-
able, it is estimated by the provincial trast that with the transportation
government that per cent can sector, which is everything from
Katy Anderson/the Gauntlet
only be accessed by steam-injec- the movement of our food and
tion (in situ) techniques while It takes three to six barrels of water for every one barrel of oil. the goods and services we consume
per cent requires surface min- to our use of vehicles, accounts for
ing. Surface mining is much more lent status at the end of the day.” tion, or THAI, uses two wells, one oilsands are] easy to get at,” said per cent of Canada’s emissions.
intensive and requires the removal Maynard noted that they are vertical and one horizontal. Air is Maynard. “[The mining is] cheaper My point is not that industry
of any surface materials before the reclaiming land as they produce, sent down the vertical well and technology and, obviously, more doesn’t have a role to play here or
oilsands beneath are accessible. but admitted that the industry is not ignited, reducing the viscosity of profitable.” that it’s not our problem, but we’re
The majority of Alberta’s oilsands reclaiming land fast enough. the oil in the ground. The oil then For the other per cent inac- not all of the problem.”
resource lies below old-growth, “We, as an industry, have to do drains down the horizontal well and cessible by mining, the process Alberta has legislated greenhouse
boreal forest. a better job of that,” said Maynard. rises to the surface. THAI extracts requires a massive injection of gas emissions targets and the federal
“We have to deal with the “We have to address some of those – per cent of the oil. Other steam into the ground. Maynard government released stricter regu-
impact of mining operations,” challenges.” methods recover anywhere from explained that it’s currently a very lations this past week, but Grant
said panelist Brian Maynard, The technology currently being – per cent. inefficient technology and that pointed out she thinks that even
the Canadian Association of used in both the mining and in situ But for the per cent of the industry is currently explor- those standards are weak and don’t
Petroleum Producers vice presi- are energy intensive, but a process resources that are accessible by ing many alternatives, not just the require enough of a reduction on
dent of stewardship and public being brought into Alberta by a strip mining—because of the close THAI method. the part of the oilsands industry.
affairs. “That means at the end of project set to begin production in proximity to the surface—Maynard “Industry is pursuing many dif- “[The federal regulations] only
the day that we have to reclaim land. may address the efficiency of noted there isn’t a technology to ferent technologies and many of the require a project to implement
We, as industry, have committed in situ techniques. replace the current method. technologies that we are pursuing carbon capture and storage,
to return to the land to an equiva- The process, toe-to-heel air injec- “[The per cent of strip mining will have lower environmental which is an end-of-the-pipe solu-
impact than existing technolo- tion to mitigating greenhouse
gies,” he said. gas emissions, by late ,” said
The panel raised the issue of the Grant. “That excludes a number
pace and scale of development. of projects which are currently in
Pembina Institute policy analyst development.”
and panelist Jennifer Grant felt that Beyond greenhouse gases, oil-
environmental concerns needed to sands developments face water
be addressed first before develop- allocation and recycling issues.
ment gets out of hand. Currently, mining operations are
“One of the things that the licensed to draw million cubic
Pembina Institute is proposing to metres of water from the Athabasca
get a handle on the scale of oilsands river annually. Though that is twice
is the temporary moratorium [on the water used by the city of Calgary
development],” said Grant. “That each year, it represents only one per
will allow us to catch up and get cent of the Athabasca’s flow.
ahead of development in terms of Ebner noted that the amount of
environmental management.” water used by the oilsands pales in
Grant noted there are alternative comparison to that used by agricul-
technologies, but felt that the pause ture, which accounts for per cent
on development was necessary to of water used in the province.
test them out. The panel also discussed the
With the current pace of devel- issues surrounding the export of
opment, the technology used in oil and the effect of rapid develop-
projects coming online over the ment on Fort McMurray and the
next few years won’t be the most Municipality of Wood Buffalo.
efficient technology available. Fort McMurray’s population has
“In , when it’s all built, ballooned. From to , the
it’ll all be year- technology,” population of Fort McMurray grew
said Ebner. “It’s the government’s at a rate of . per cent per year.
responsibility [to push industry] to The Wed., Mar. panel was
lean towards the future. Not all of part of the SU’s Enviropalooza
it works right now, but it has the Week. Enviropalooza continues
potential to work quite quickly.” with a Busking for Smiles per-
Ebner added that we should formance in MacEwan Student
question how many projects the Centre’s north courtyard Thu. at
government approves that don’t noon, and with a sustainability open
have carbon capture technology. house in MacEwan Hall Fri.
GAUNTLET NEWS MARCH 13.08 7
Separating the wheat from the Board
he National Citizens’
Coalition is going after the
Canadian Wheat Board
with pitchforks and torches in a
new multimedia campaign.
The NCC is relying on an advertis-
ing campaign with newspaper, radio
spots, billboards and e-mail to get
its message out about ending the
CWB’s monopoly on wheat.
NCC communication manager
Kylie-Anne Doerner explained the
NCC believes the CWB limits freedom
of choice and farmers should not
face jailtime for selling their crops
to the customer of their choice.
“In the st century it should
not be a crime to market your own
crops,” said Doerner. “Opening
up the marketing system would
allow Canadian farmers to receive
prices closer to those of the world
Doerner was quick to add that the
new campaign was in reaction to the
federal government losing the battle
Leya Russell/the Gauntlet
to eliminate the CWB’s single-desk
monopoly on barley farming in the The National Citizens’ Coalition are ﬁghting for the right to sell their grain. Currently they must sell it to the Canadian Wheat Board.
Federal Court of Appeal.
“The NCC has been fighting to farmers who democratically elect ten a legal process the Western farmers make a decent living from the mar- and tried to run the border, not
restore democracy and freedom representatives to its -member can follow to change the law and ketplace, not from poorly-designed because they did not sell to CWB.
to western farmers for years,” said governing board,” said Fitzhenry. create an open market in a valid government subsidy programs,” said “These guys who claim they
Doerner. “But with the recent court “Eight of these farmers [are] in referendum, but until that hap- Pugh. can get a better price outside the
ruling in response to barley farmers favour of single desk marketing.” pens, farmers are obliged to follow “Farmers realized they needed to board are ironically those who are
having a dual marketing system, the Fitzhenry noted the CWB is ben- the current law. have a big player that acted in their most likely to undersell their col-
NCC believed it was time to, once eficial to farmers because the board National Farmers’ Union execu- interests, not against their interests leagues,” said Pugh. “The National
again, bring this campaign to the ensures the farmers have a strong tive secretary Terry Pugh seconded and they pressured the federal gov- Citizens Coalition is not a
forefront.” voice in dealing with the grain Fitzhenry’s statements about the ernment to implement the Canadian grassroots coalition of ordinary citi-
The NCC felt the CWB is not industry and get a decent return importance of the CWB. Wheat Board in the ’s.” zens, but a front organization for
a democratic system because it on their product. “The National Farmers’ Union Pugh noted the farmers were large corporations that advocates
prosecutes farmers who refuse to “Empowering farmers is even supports the Canadian Wheat Board prosecuted because they failed to policies that are in the interests
sell their products to the board. more important today than it because we believe farmers need to obtain necessary export certificates of multinational agri-business.”
“Farmers should not face ever was, given the even greater
jailtime for selling their crops strength and consolidation of
to the customer of their choice, nor the grain companies—with four
should the Wheat Board be permit- large companies controlling over
ted to use the pool money to fight per cent of global wheat sales,”
those who want that freedom,” said noted Fitzhenry.
Doerner. Fitzhenry explained farmers
CWB spokesperson Maureen have to sell their products to the
Fitzhenry was quick to defend the CWB because its single desk market
CWB from the criticisms. nature can only provide benefits if
“The CWB is controlled by prairie it is a monopoly. She noted there is
Former child solider coming
Andrew Barbero literary quality and horrifying truths
Gauntlet News contained in his book, many would
recognize Beah from his numerous
Former child soldier and award- television appearances, including
winning author Ishmael Beah will the gamut of networks news pro-
speak at the University of Calgary grams and high-profile interviews
Sun., Mar. . with George Stroumboulopoulos
Beah’s book, A Long Way and Jon Stewart.
Gone: Memoirs of a Child Soldier, Now living in New York and
chronicles his youth in Sierra Leone, working with the Human Rights
where he lost his entire family to Watch Children’s Division Advisory
civil war and was forced into mili- Committee, Beah continues to advo-
tary service at the age of . The cate for the estimated , child
book documents the atrocities of soldiers still deployed today.
the war, the acts Beah was coerced
into committing, as well as his
eventual rescue and rehabilitation The lecture begins at 7 p.m. Tickets are available
for $10 Campus Ticket Centre or by calling
at the hands of UNICEF. Receiving 220-7202. Watch for coverage in next week’s
an abundance of praise for both the Gauntlet.
8 MARCH 13.08 GAUNTLET NEWS
Far from drowning in it
Christian Louden water. A one- or two-degree Celsius
Production Editor temperature increase will reduce the
amount of standing water that exists
ater in Alberta will be widely because of evaporation.”
a major concern in the Sandford also emphasized the need
coming years if climate to plan for droughts, and noted he
change current environmental prac- believes it is important to break the
tices continue. link between economic growth and
An International Association of water use.
Students in Economics and Business University of Calgary PhD stu-
Management seminar held in the dents Tara Mortan and Kate Sinclair
University of Calgary’s That Empty emphasized the importance of glacial
Space Thu., Mar. featured several melt in Alberta’s water system and
presentations about the effect of how increasingly warm temperatures
human interactions with the envi- are threatening it.
ronment and what it means for future “Eleven of the last years rank
water supplies. among the warmest years for
Daniel Pagan/the Gauntlet
United Nations International temperatures observed since the
Decade for Action, Water for Life industrial revolution,” said Mortan, Contrary to myth, water may not always be abundant in Alberta.
initiative chairman Robert Sandford pointing out that glaciers will con-
served as the emcee and keynote tinue to recede if temperatures do not Glaciers form as a result of accu- “There’s a really fine balance ing a threat to water supplies in parts
speaker for the event and warned lower, causing a yearly reduction of mulated snow pack during the between the two [zones] and what of the world with an already lower
of the dangers of feeling too com- available water in Alberta. winter months that flows down- happens is, if we change global tem- access to water. The famed snows of
fortable with the amount of water “Glacial melt makes a particularly ward into the ablation, or melt peratures, or if we warm the Earth’s Mount Kilimanjaro, Tanzania have
available in Canada. important influence in late summer zone, where it melts and becomes atmosphere, we end up increasing the melted more than per cent since
“We have to be very careful with to river flow,” Mortan said. “As much part of the river system during the size of this lower ablation zone,” said , Sinclair explained.
estimates of how much water we as per cent of our river flow in warmer months of the year, Mortan Mortan. “We’re actually moving this “It’s the mountain ranges in the mid
have,” said Sandford. “We widely late August to September comes explained. As yearly temperatures area of the glacier higher, creating latitudes and subtropics that respond
tell the rest of the world that we have from glacial melt. During these increase, however, the ablation zone more area where more melt actually most rapidly to climate change and
per cent of the world’s water, really dry times of year, our rivers recedes further into the accumu- persists, and we end up with glacier will have the biggest impact on water
when we only have five per cent really require glacial melt to maintain lation zone, reducing the am- recession.” resources,” she said.
of the world’s renewable sources of healthy levels of river flow.” ount of snow pack accumulation. Glacial melt is increasingly becom- see WATER, page
GAUNTLET NEWS MARCH 13.08 9
Rez, cont’d from page 5
equal rate placing a greater strain on the stu- years. The million does not take into account
dents. Currently per cent of family hous- the major problems that need to be done in
ing revenue is assigned to maintenance, which Norquay, Brewster and Castle that we’ve been
Galal argued should have covered the costs of talking about for a couple of years now.”
eventual upgrades. Stewart also said he was impressed with
“Anyone who has a house in Calgary and the below market costs that residence services
rents it divides his resources regarding mainte- ensured for students living in all residences.
nance and renovations and loans of the build- Stewart and Dunsdon agreed with the viability
ing,” said Galal. “The problem is the university of knocking down several building and replac-
has used its resources from the income of the ing them in the future.
units, now they tell us the unit is in miserable “There are a couple of building that if you
Olivia Komorowski/the Gauntlet
condition and we have to renovate it.” look at how much is going to be required to
Vice-provost students Ann Tierney said Galal doesn’t understand why rent for his on-campus family unit will be going up. ensure they’re available for years, it’s actually
that the increase was not having an effect on more cost effective to rebuilt,” said Dunsdon.
applications for new students or those wishing for renovations will not benefit from them. over a longer term in the event that we might “The majority of the money is going to be spent
to live in family housing next year. She speci- “To fund the project in order build we bor- was to replace some of them.” on Kananaskis, Rundle and family housing.
fied that million from the project had been row, but it is in fact the revenue from rates Residence Students’ Association president We’re very committed to renewing our exist-
allocated to family housing to renew kitchens, that helps us pay back the mortgage or the Lance Stewart was pleased with the progress, but ing buildings for students and we’re also
paint, fix flooring and paint, and other plumb- borrowing,” said Tierney. “In the report there made it clear that residence buildings needed committed to expanding residence capacity
ing and electrical necessities. In alone, were over million of suggestions but some as much help as they could get. on our campus.”
the total is listed as over one million dollars of them were things like repainting here and “The million just scratches the surface,” The recently proposed phase six build-
and will hopefully be completed by . there. Of course there was the issue, for some said Stewart. “It’s basically a small project to get ing is set to be completed in , with
Galal also argued students currently paying of the buildings, how much we wanted to invest done, the absolute necessity for the next five sites currently under consideration.
Water, cont’d from page 8
U of C professor Dr. Cathy Ryan way back into the river connected sider not developing in any land use land use on the alluvial aquifer. from the ground—to make way
emphasized that the danger to ground water. It contaminates drink- that will affect the ground water U of C professor Dr. Maria Strack for oilsand development—the
Calgary’s water supply comes from ing water and fertilizers encourage quality underneath,” said Ryan, who discussed the potential danger of car- decaying peat will release carbon
contamination of the city’s alluvial growth of aquatic plants—which take had recently given a similar lecture bon dioxide emissions coming from into the atmosphere.
aquifer. The aquifer is an area of oxygen out of water—killing fish. on the importance of protecting peatland excavation, particularly in “We really want to maintain
Calgary in which the ground is so “There are square kilometers land use to Rockyview representa- northern Alberta as a result of oil- the carbon stock that is held
permeable, fertilizers and other of land here on the river connected tives. She also noted that water in sands development. Strack pointed in that soil in order to pre-
chemicals dumped on lawns will soak alluvial aquifer that the [Municipal quality in Calgary is significantly to peatlands as a major store of vent a positive feedback to
through the ground and find their District] of Rockyview should con- lower than it is upstream because of carbon and noted that if mined climate change,” Strack said.
10 MARCH 13.08 GAUNTLET NEWS
U of C VP ﬁnance appointed
Cam Cotton-O’Brien had some of the attributes they were [will take some time to adjust to].”
TLF Editor looking for,” said Stephens. Due to mass construction going on
U of C president Dr. Harvey at the U of C, a new vp will be hired
ecause cash is what feeds the Weingarten stressed that the vp to attend exclusively to development
monster, the University of finance and services role is an projects, but Stephens will also play
Calgary’s appointment of a important one. a role, as she will control the money
new vice-president finance and ser- “We are a million plus busi- for those projects.
vices is of no small consequence to ness here, it is a huge, complicated Weingarten expressed delight
students and administration. place,” said Weingarten. “There is a lot that Stephens would be joining his
Gail Stephens, the incoming vp, of money flowing through here.” administration.
will take over from current-VP Mike Stephens noted that, although “We feel very fortunate to have
McAdams May . Her role will be she would have to wait until she attracted her,” said Weingarten. “She
managing the U of C’s finances, had some experience at the U of C has a wealth of experience in areas
human resources, information and its management before she could where we face some of the biggest
technology and investments. identify specific goals, she does have challenges and opportunities.”
Stephens comes from a varied a couple of ideas in mind. For her part, Stephens feels up to
background. Starting out as an “One of them will be to maximize the task.
elementary teacher in Ontario and the new PeopleSoft software,” said “I’ve [led] many organizations
Manitoba, she worked her way Stephens. “There are always imple- through major change,” she said. “I’m
Chris Tait/the Gauntlet
up to some very important posi- mentation woes with any new system. pretty good at coming in and helping
tions including serving as the chief It doesn’t matter what organization an organization become great.” President Dr. Weingarten is pleased with the new VP catch.
administrative officer for the City of
Winnipeg—a role in which she was
responsible for both the police and
fire departments, among others. Most
recently she served as the chief execu-
tive officer for the British Columbia
Pension Corporation—an organiza-
tion with about , members and
handling roughly billion.
“The head-hunters that were doing
the search knew me and thought I
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opinions GAUNTLET MARCH 13.08 11
Editor: Ændrew Rininsland—firstname.lastname@example.org
Zeitgeist ist “time ghost” auf Deutsch, ja!
Controversial movie needs a critical eye in order to be understood
a few meandering clicks!
Why is this important? The closer
it comes to Z-Day, the more willing
they are to gloss over inconvenient
Jordyn Marcellus facts. For instance, video footage
E&P Editor from the Madrid bombings of
is used during a discussion
n Sat., Mar. th, all over of the London bombings of ,
the world people will sit the implication being that the foot-
down and watch Zeitgeist: age is from the actual bombings in
the Movie as part of a worldwide day London. It’s deceptive filmmaking
of activism called Z-Day. The free pure and simple and no manner of
online film has taken the Internet by self-righteous explanation can dis-
storm with it’s compellingly edited regard the simple fact: it’s an out
footage and seemingly obvious and out lie, “creative example” be
message about religion, the / damned. For a film that rails against
attacks and the perils and pitfalls deception, there’s a lot of deception
of blindly following authority as implicit in its creation.
exemplified by the discussion of There isn’t a degree of self-righ-
the gold standard and the tax code teousness to the film, as in any film
system. While it presents itself with that tries to use activism to get its
the trappings of a documentary, it is, message across. It starts off with a
in fact, a comprehensive collection two-minute montage of bombings
of memes spread around the right- set to thunderously loud and pon-
wing conspiracy theory community derous music to set the mood of
gussied up with shocking footage chaos, alternating with a quiet and
and a tacked-on, feel-good ending sombre score to show human life
that belies the preceding, two-hour and creativity. Then, the thematic
shake-up. image takes to the screen: the world
On Facebook, nearly , peo- in a cage. Despite the heavy-hand-
ple have joined the group Zeitgeist: edness of the metaphor, that’s what
The Documentary of a Lifetime. the film is trying to show: through
Whenever someone criticizes it, religion, the American government’s
the collective Internet furor will lies or outright complicity in the
often leave the article’s comments / attacks, other “false flag” attacks
filled with over nine thousand and the economy that’s run by an
replies decrying the professional- elitist caste of bankers, we’re being
ism, lack of research or how the controlled and are trapped in a cage To briefly touch on the second As the film transitions into its are controlling the world has been
author spends his time nitpicking that prevents us from being free. section, if one reads the sources third part, a John F. Kennedy quo- around since the s. It’s old hat,
the sources and not enough criticiz- The film first discusses religion. It and the way it’s been described tation about secret societies comes but gussied up with a fresh coat of
ing the ideas. There are nearly takes the tack of using an historical previous to the website’s scrub- on screen. The statement, in context paint with quotes that seemingly
public showings of Zeitgeist sched- Jesus argument and tries to tie it bing, the second section is actually with the film, is ostensibly about the have no sources to them outside of
uled for Mar. ( at the time of in with Horus, Buddha, and other an amalgamation of many differ- banker clans that are controlling the a list of books.
this writing), with more than religious figures with the com- ent / Truth Movement films economy. Anyone who actually It’s hard to reject or agree with
other private showings. This film is mon thread of a “sun god.” While like Loose Change and the Alex knows where the quotation is from, the film when it comes to sources,
a true phenomenon. there are similarities, the way the Jones Prison Planet series. This though, would understand that the as it’s just a list. There’s no contextu-
There’s an irony, though. For a film presents the relation is too circular method of research quote is actually from a speech JFK alization within the sources for the
film that tries so hard to tell the straightforward. This is the common means that someone can’t even gave on communism. More decep- quotations. Outside of the first part’s
viewer to think about what they problem in the film: presenting find the source of the claims in tive filmmaking at work! interactive transcript with footnotes,
experience in the world and to something in such The third part is the site and its ostensible adminis-
“...For a ﬁlm that tries so hard
reject authority, many people have a shallow manner the culmination of trator just put a list of quotes on the
blindly followed the documentary without further the previous two page and expect the person to do the
without doing their own research. corroboration or thematic devices: research and find the sources. This
This is why, more than anything,
a hard look at the ideas of the film
It distils years of to tell the viewer to think about the amalgamation
of the infamous
isn’t useful at all and only makes it
harder to believe the film when a
what they experience in the
is needed. advanced scholarly “Seven Jew bank- sterner look is given to its sources.
A moment should be spent at the work into a pithy ers control the Given the circular nature of many of
online home of Zeitgeist itself. While little comparison world” meme and the sources, when one firmly begins
it would come across as tinfoil hat
paranoia, there’s been an interesting
and doesn’t explore
the examples, the world and to reject authority, the “I don’t have
to pay my taxes
to research the film, it’s hard for any
but the most ardent conspiracy nut
many people have blindly fol-
development on the website. As of greater historical in America!” idea to believe any of it.
Mar. , a small subsection contexts and the that has surfaced It’s okay to like Zeitgeist. It’s well-
of the website has been completely complicated reali- in right-wing edited and is truly compelling. To
scrubbed from the site. This section,
the “clarifications” section, alludes
ties into something
approaching lowed the documentary without militia subcul-
ture with such
use it as a piece of activism, like the
idea of Z-Day, however, is unfor-
doing their own research.”
to dishonest filmmaking tactics that “Horus and Jesus force. Conspiracy tunate. There are points about war
would otherwise help to discredit the come from the theory buffs will and religion that are important to
film. Instead, a self-righteous Q&A same place.” In the understand that note, but they’re lost in the greater
section that attempts to smack down world of a spectrum while thankfully frothing-at-the-mouth conspiracies.
its critics has replaced it. Thanks to of greys, the film argues everything this section. It’s infuriating and Zeitgeist doesn’t identify any Like the film argues for so firmly:
the wonders of Archive.org and its in black-and-white, which isn’t sur- prevents any kind of real discus- Jews as bankers—instead focus- if you’re about to watch Zeitgeist,
Wayback Machine, though, anyone prising when the second part of sion about the credibility of the ing on men like Rockefeller and please don’t take it at face value.
can read the clarifications with just the film hits the screen. original source material. J.P. Morgan—the idea that bankers Use your noodle and think!
12 MARCH 13.08 GAUNTLET OPINIONS
Cream Pies for everyone!
their annual pieing fund-raiser. is glorious, but it has detractors. the trouble of applying makeup great opportunity to play a joke
Through the last three days of the Some professors get angry or combing your hair, you’ve put on your friends, because, man,
week, students venturing over to because it disrupts their class. some effort into affecting what other people look silly with pie all over
the Engineering Students’ Society Understandable, but as pie week people will think of you, via your their faces.
Cam Cotton-O’Brien may pony up five bucks to have the only comes but once a year and outside appearance. Why not get The proceeds go to charity and
Pidgeon Talk engineers pie their friends. All that the pie squad always waits until pied, then? This will make you look even the Students’ Union executive
is required is the money, a name, the end of class, there is really very real cool, in that laid back, “I’m okay is getting pied this year, so there is
espite requiring me to the room number and time for the little that profs should be stressing with a prank” sort of way. And if you no reason not to join in the riot-
wear an infuriatingly victim to be located and they will about, unless they’re the ones who do have pink eye, you shouldn’t be ous fun.
bright-pink and scratchy be pied. are going to need the paper towel. at school anyways, sickie. Students frequently complain
wristband that has kept me up all The pies are basically shells con- The other problem is with stu- If there is some legitimate rea- about the lack of community on
week, the prospect of joining the taining cream filling—all the better dents refusing to participate. Some son that you must not be pied—for campus. There can surely be no
engineering pie-squad was too deli- to cover people with. Though choco- don’t want to mess up their makeup, instance, deathly allergies—then at better way to incite this than hittin’
cious an opportunity to pass up. late is popular, the best to get people or their hair, or their “pink eye,” so least still participate. For an addi- people in the face with a pie. Keep
Every year around Mar. —or with is coconut, as it leaves little they claim. But really, this shouldn’t tional five dollars, you can redirect an eye out, I might be in your class
for geeks, .—the engineers run chunks all over. Indeed, Pi Week be happening. If you’ve gone to the pie to someone else. This is a tomorrow with a coconut cream.
SU View: The SU weighs in on provincial election results
when the legislature opens later the large number of students liv- on post-secondary education, the profit off of student debt.
this month. Once again our uni- ing in the riding. As your Students’ Conservatives did make one sub- Now that the election is over, we
versity riding will be represented Union, we did everything in our stantial promise: to lower interest will continue to work through our
by Liberal Harry Chase. Despite not power to inform you of the issues rates on student loans. This will be provincial advocacy group CAUS
Mike Selnes belonging to the governing party, and give you all the information you a welcome relief for the thousands (Council of Alberta University
VP External Harry has been a tireless advocate needed to cast your ballot during our of students burdened by debt upon Students) to inform both new and
for students and has promised to Provincial Election Awareness days. graduation as interest rates will be re-elected MLAs about the challenges
On Mon., Mar. , Albertans went continue advocating for our cause Despite this, many students found lowered by . per cent to prime. facing university students and to
to the polls and with overwhelm- in the house. it difficult to vote and over the next This has been a major advocacy ensure they implement all of their
ing support elected the provincial It’s interesting to note that despite four years we will advocate for bet- point by the Students’ Union this campaign promises concerning
Conservative government to another a low per cent voter turnout prov- ter student voting regulations and a year. Lowering interest rates on post-secondary education.
term in office. ince-wide, the lowest in history, our Calgary-wide poll on campus. students loans could potentially
With the ballots counted, riding of Calgary-Varsity had the You may ask yourself what mean hundreds of dollars in long-
The SU View and its corresponding headline are
Calgary will be represented by highest turnout in the city. There effect the election had for students. term savings for students and will provided by the Students’ Union and published
Conservatives and Liberals is no doubt this was increased by Despite having a vague platform ensure the government does not without Gauntlet editorial revision.
14 MARCH 13.08 GAUNTLET SPORTS
A look at synchronized
swimming and how a U of C
Amanda Hu/the Gauntlet
group is making their mark
Amanda Hu inception, synchro has often been portrayed training for perfection and artistry in a sport cal mark. In regards to technicality, judges
Sports Editor in a very whimsical light, from Miss Piggy that prides itself on looking easy. often reward groups who do more figures
giving it a go in The Great Muppet Caper, “We could beat any hockey boy at a as they are more difficult to do, given that
ppearing effortless often requires to the flower bonnet-adorned background fitness endurance test,” says University the swimmers are submerged, as well as
A the superior effort. In the world
of synchronized swimming, the
illusion of ease masks the sheer amount
of work required for the sport.
swimmers in the opening sequence to
Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me
who were, more than anything else, cute
set-pieces with movement. Behind those
of Calgary synchronized swimming club
member Kerry Atkins. “In terms of sport,
you have your cardiovascular fitness, flex-
ibility and endurance. It’s every single sport
movements that require more physical
skill, like lifting both of one’s arms up as
opposed to just one.
“You use all these different things and
At a glance, one typically sees poised polished smiles and matching swimsuits, combined, plus no oxygen.” pattern changes, slow movements, fast
young women gracefully completing simul- however, lay hardened athletes at peak Synchro typically consists of combina- movements to make things interesting,”
taneous movements in water and since its physical condition who have spent years tions of different elements that represent says Laurel Alexander, coach of U of C
the many techniques of the sport. Figures synchro. “The faster you move, the harder
consist of movements that put a swimmer’s it is because it’s hard to synchronize the
head under water, such as lifting the legs team together.”
in to the air, while strokes represent The sport emerged in in the form
movements done with the head above the of underwater ballet and, through melding
“In terms of sport, you have your with the original
cardiovascular ﬁtness, ﬂexibility and slowly transformed
into a team activ-
endurance. It’s every single sport ity. The activity
made a strong
combined, plus no oxygen.” move to breaking
sightlines when it
became a demon-
stration sport at the
- Kerry Atkins, U of C synchronized swimmer Olympics and
water. Figures and strokes interact and lead full competitive event status in .
towards highlights, which, as suggested by Closer to home, the U of C synchronized
the name, consist of audience-appealing swimming club has created a niche for those
movement like lifting a swimmer into the in the synchro world who want to find the
air or throws. middle ground between the high school
Geoff MacIntosh/the Gauntlet
Going into competition, teams are level and national and Olympic competi-
A swimmer being launched into the air. judged with an artistic mark and a techni- tion. Formed in , the club has made
GAUNTLET SPORTS MARCH 13.08 15
an obvious splash in the Canadian Dedication to what we’re doing
university synchronized swim- and passion for wanting to pursue
ming world. The group garnered excellence [is important].”
unexpected success, claiming the The nature of the sport also
bronze medal while competing in makes gaining coverage a chal-
their first-ever national competi- lenge for the group.
tion at Waterloo University on “I also think it’s hard for the
Feb. , . They came back media to cover it because there
the following year to initially tie aren’t a lot of events,” says Benson.
for first with the defending cham- “It’s not like we have tournaments
pions, McGill University, only to every weekend. But that’s what
end on the second-place podium makes the sport so unique. You
after technical scores served as train for -hours-plus a week and
the competition’s tie-breaker. then you have three minutes that
With the group so close to com- you perform your routine three
plete victory at such an early stage times a year.”
in their creation, all eyes are on That commitment and drive
the rookies and their impressive has pushed the team towards
accomplishments. their laurels, despite being such
“When we swam last year, I a young group in the synchronized
don’t think [the other teams] swimming world. Currently, they
knew what to expect, like it are a students’ union sanctioned
was this mess of people coming club and applied for a travel grant
together and making a club for the to make going to nationals possi-
first year,” says Atkins. “I think we ble. The group hopes to eventually
kind of shocked and surprised a gain competitive club status from
lot of people.” campus recreation, which will
The club draws its member- help them garner much-needed
ship from different facets of the pool time at the U of C Aquatic
Calgary synchro swimming com- Centre as well as become more
munity, including groups like the of a staple on campus. With this
Aquabelles and the Calgary Winter increased support, the team will
Club. Each member has spent have the reinforcement to continue
years perfecting their technique being a serious contender at the
and building their knowledge on national varsity level.
the sport while dealing with the “[We want] to become more
realities of the activity and the visible within the campus com-
restrictions put on wanting to munity and attract more members
continue on in the synchronized and to be viewed as an competitive
swimming world. athletic team, as opposed to just a
“With so many sports, you can social club or a recreational club,”
do those at the intramural level,” Benson says. “We know that it’s
says Shannon Benson, a U of C hard to get pool time at the U of C,
synchro member. “Because syn- so we felt like we had to establish
chro’s so technical and involved, ourselves and I think our results
Amanda Hu/the Gauntlet
with such structured training, clearly speak to the fact that we’re
it’s really hard to do it at a rec- dedicated to this team’s continued Lifting someone from under water is no easy task.
reational level. Synchro’s such a success.”
unique sport, so you need all of us Increased recognition of the who credits their understanding Though their competitive aspira- to remember why they loved the
to be in the water at the same time group will also give some well- of team dynamics and the infective tions remain, the U of C club has sport in the first place.
and you can’t just have an off day. deserved support to the group, nature of synchro on its members. given some of the girls a chance “I was on the national team
for four years and went to two
junior worlds and we placed
second and third in ,” says
Atkins. “I didn’t want to go back
to competing and I didn’t want to
perform as a career, so this was a
good balance for me to find some
way to be involved and not have
to sacrifice everything else in my
Atkins adds that she was origi-
nally reluctant to join the group
because of past experiences.
“When you get to such a high
competitive level, it’s not about
fun anymore or enjoying anything
and that’s what I kind of associated
synchro with, so I didn’t want to
get involved with that at all,” she
says. “Once I got into it [here], I
realized it wasn’t like that at all and
it kind of made me realize why I
started swimming and why I stuck
with it for years.”
Having next year in mind, the
group hopes to host a competition
at the university, bringing in teams
from other schools in Canada and
the U.S. and something to U of C
that students can get interested in
watching and being a part of. With
their already plentiful triumphs,
they can hopefully look forward to
seeing the U of C name in gold and
on championship banners.
Geoff MacIntosh/the Gauntlet
16 MARCH 13.08 GAUNTLET SPORTS
Hockeysaurs fall short in ACAC ﬁnal
DINOS GRIFFINS as well by a score of – and forc-
ing them to settle for silver. Despite
3 their best efforts and some incred-
ible hockey, it wasn’t enough for the
Dinos, surrendering a series that fate
women’s hockey just didn’t allow them to win.
“I think we are two equal teams
skill wise and it really came down
Derek Neumeier to special teams and who wanted it
Gauntlet Sports more in the end,” said captain Cait
O’Hara. “Both teams worked hard
hey came so close, but in the entire minutes of every game
the end, the University of and, with a few bounces here and
Calgary Dinos women’s there, all of the four games could
hockey team was still one heart-shat- have gone either way.”
tering step shy of their goal. All sea- Even though the Dinos fell shy
son long, the Dinos had their sights of their aim of a championship, the
on number one, but despite tearing girls still have good reason to hold
through their playoff opposition their heads high after an undeniably
all the way to the Alberta Colleges successful year. Few expected the
Athletic Conference finals, the lady team to finish the regular season at a
hockeysaurs were unable to make solid –– after going –––
that last required push to grab gold, in – and even fewer imag-
losing in four games to the Grant ined they could fight their way to
MacEwan College Griffins. the finals, but the Dinos effectively
Both the Dinos and the Griffins silenced their critics. They showed
came into the finals red-hot, deserv- the league that they are no longer
ing to be there after respectively the underdog of years past and
upsetting the two teams that tied are now a contender for years to
for first place in the ACAC during the come.
Geoff MacIntosh/the Gauntlet
regular season, the Southern Alberta “Our season went extremely
Institute of Technology Trojans and Captain Cait O’Hara (#8) edges out the competition for the puck. well, better than expected,” said
the Mount Royal College Cougars. Goyette. “We gained respect from
The third-ranked Dinos fought tum going into the finals,” remarked of the best-of-five finals with a win something in the crowd in front of our opponents and proved we could
valiantly for their cause but were Dinos head coach Danielle Goyette. and a loss, both teams had a week to the Griffins net, turning the area compete against any team. As far
unable to slow down the surging, “The series was tight [and] not a lot prepare themselves for the remain- into a pinball game with the puck. as I’m concerned, our season was
fifth-ranked Griffins, who played of goals were scored. GMC played ing and deciding games. Game three It eventually made its way to for- very successful and I know we did
their best hockey of the season in great but I feel the series against at the Olympic Oval started well for ward Lianna Legere’s stick, who put not win it all but we gained a lot of
the past month and proved to be the SAIT took a lot out of our team the Dinos, jumping out to a – lead it home to secure her team-leading experience along the way.”
stronger team down the stretch. and we didn’t recover enough to : in. With a power play at their fourth goal of the playoffs. The lead O’Hara agreed with her coach’s
“GMC improved a lot since be at our best.” disposal, defender Ali Webb fired wouldn’t last the period however, as statements.
Christmas and kept the momen- After splitting the first weekend a shot from the blue line that hit GMC tied things up with : left, “Even though we didn’t take
thanks to a Dinos defensive zone home the gold, I believe we won a
turnover leading to a partial break- lot more than we lost,” she said. “I
away that was finished by Melody think that this season proved that
Howard, her team’s leading goal the Dinos are serious about com-
scorer during the regular season. peting and always getting better.
The entire series was a tight, low- We improved drastically since the
scoring affair, so when the game beginning of the season and even
remained tied up at – going into more so since the Christmas break.
the third, it seemed likely that the I think that shows a lot of charac-
next goal would stand as the game’s ter for our team. Those of us who
winner. Unfortunately for the Dinos, were on the ice that day will never
it did. Griffin Lauren Chiswell beat forget how heartbreaking it was to
Dinos netminder Katie Urness with watch the other team celebrate. That
a sneaky wrist shot through a screen feeling will push us to always want
with only : remaining and Grant to be better and know what we are
MacEwan stood their ground from working for.”
there, skating away with both a – With the – hockey sched-
victory and a – series lead, heading ule now behind them, the Dinos can
up to St. Albert needing only one look towards their bright future.
more victory to clinch gold. The The majority of the young core
effort was a lacking one for the will return for next season a year
Dinos, who felt they played under older and more experienced, aided
their abilities on the evening and by a squad of new recruits eager to
needed to improve upon that if they play under legend Goyette and
wanted to bring the series back to take part in the newly-rejuvenated
Calgary for game five. women’s hockey program at the
“Our game plan all year has been U of C. Indeed, there is no extinction
to work hard,” noted defender Sarah in sight for the rampaging Dinos.
Clowes after the loss. “We need to “My goal is to improve every
step that up and leave no regrets year as a team and as individuals,”
on the ice.” concluded Goyette. “We will con-
Knowing what needed to be done tinue to work hard both on and off
and having the capacity to do the the ice, challenging players to take
same proved to be two different them to the next level. The future
things for the lady hockeysaurs as of the Dinos hockey team is to be
they were unable to rebound from competitive and a contender—not
the night before, losing game four just participants in the league.”
GAUNTLET SPORTS MARCH 13.08 17
Track Dinos ﬁnish
second and fourth at CIS
track and field Women’s side
CIS competition in Montreal
yielded some top results for the
Men’s side Dinos women’s team. The lady
pearheaded by the brilliant Dinos brought home some hard-
performance of male track ware and placed fourth overall,
athlete of the year and CIS behind Guelph, Western and
championship MVP Sam Effah, the Windsor. Individual highlights
University of Calgary Dinos men’s included Amonn Nelson’s gold in
track and field team busted their the metre, Jessica O’Connell’s
asses to come within three points silver in the metre and
of winning the CIS championships Holly Ratzlaff’s bronze in the
in Montreal Mar. –. metre. The depth of the group was
On McGill University’s metre showcased through the success
banked-track from the top track and of the relay teams, who captured
field athletes from across the coun- gold in the x metre and the
try came to compete. Entering the x metre races, and were com-
tournament, the Dinos men were posed of Nelson, Ratzlaff, Tessa
ranked third, while the x metre Gray and Kelsey Lotwin. The
and x metre relay teams, while x metre relay team claimed
Effah in the metre and metre second place through the efforts of
and Trent Ratzlafff in the metre Rachel Romero, Heather Sim, Jessica
were ranked first. None of them O’Connell and Valerie Hurdle.
failed to live up to the hype. Head coach Doug Lamont was
“The guys did everything they pleased with the results.
could possibly do and then some,” “The girls came in and did
said Lamont. “Both Trent and Sam everything they could do,” he said.
had to be on their game to achieve “They maintained their composure
what they were capable of.” and competed hard, and that’s all
Effah’s performance was so good, one can ask.”
that in the final point tally, he con- Last season, the Dino women
tributed to of the Dinos men’s were the CIS champions, but they
points— individually and were ranked fourth going into CIS
with the relays. Lamont noted that competition this year.
the biggest surprise of the weekend “In addition to the graduation of
came from a stronger than expected [Dinos top-scorer] Jessica Zelinka,
x metre relay team that entered it’s a young team,” commented
the meet ranked seventh but finished Lamont, “If we can build by get-
fourth. The relays held another ting more young talent coming in,
unexpected result, too. we can soon be competing for a
“A big surprise for me [was] that national title.”
we got the CIS record [in the x With this year being her first expe-
metre relay],” said Ratzlaff. rience with CIS track competition,
U of C records were set in all three rookie Jessica O’Connell was look-
relays and in the metre. ing towards the meet positively.
The Dinos men now take a week’s “I was really excited to see what it
rest before returning to train for the would be like,” she said. “Going in, I
outdoor season, where they race for was hoping to medal. Not expecting,
the University of Calgary Athletic but hoping. It’s always nice when
Club, not the Dinos as there is no things work out.”
varsity team for outdoor track. In terms of the women’s team
Training for indoor track and field in general, O’Connell was pleased
resumes in the fall. Lamont expects with the result.
next year’s team, which will see the “For the most part, we were
return of all the Dinos CIS competi- all really happy with our perfor-
tors, to be very strong. Ratzlaff is also mances,” she said. “The energy
positive about the Dinos future. was strong because our team is so
“We have a pretty young team, cohesive and it’s fun supporting
so I’m hoping that we can at least your best friends.”
match what we did this year,” said Next up for the Dinos is the out-
Ratzlaff. “I think with a few more door season. Competitions through-
rookies, maybe we can improve and out the spring and summer will take
bring back the title.” place at Foothills Track.
..Cam Cotton-O’Brien ..Laura Bennett
18 MARCH 13.08 GAUNTLET SPORTS
Boyles in like Flint
Katy Anderson after. His student athlete graduates involved in trying to get us on a
News Editor in a timely fashion and the best of better path than the one we were
them play for team Canada.” on,” he said.
he University of Calgary Boyles plans to do a full overhaul However, Boyles pointed to
Dinosaurs athletics pro- of the athletic department, from the difficulties of hiring a coach
gram has their Hannibal the staffing structure to programs. for the short period of time. He
to direct them over the athletic He noted the department is facing noted this might mean a younger
Alps for another season. financial challenges and he plans coach would be suitable, someone
Women’s volleyball coach Kevin to examine current resources who could maintain the culture of
Boyles led his team to nationals and programming, determine the program and continue on their
eight times—with seven final-four where resources don’t match successful path.
appearances—in a row and now the programming and then look Kinesiology director of commu-
plans to lead the U of C’s athletic at where new resources can be nications Don McSwiney stressed
program to excellence, continuing obtained. the new coach would have big
the role of interim athletic director “Our goal is to have every one of shoes to fill, noting Boyles is one
for the next year. of the best volley-
Boyles took the
position in the “‘Our goal is to have every one of ball coaches in the
new year, after
former athletic our programs be able to compete at “On one hand,
we’re delighted to
Wilson was dis-
a level that makes them a top-three have somebody of
that caliber as the
missed last Oct.
Boyles decided to program in the country.” athletic director for
the University of
continue on with -Kevin Boyles, Calgary, but on the
the job last week
for the –
Dinos interim athletic director other hand, trying
to find somebody to
school year. replace him is a pretty
Kinesiology dean Wayne Giles our programs be able to compete tall order,” said McSwiney.
explained Boyles was chosen at a level that makes them a top McSwiney added that having
because of the unique style of lead- three program in the country,” Boyles as the interim athletic
ership Boyles portrays, as well as a said Boyles. “We feel that the director was interesting because
number of well-defined strengths U of C and the city of Calgary have of the different, useful perspec-
he brought to the job. the resources and the capacity.” tive he could bring to the position
“He has built his program from Despite having to leave the lead- as he’s coming from a coaching
scratch to a place of national promi- ership role of a team he has invested background.
nence,” said Giles. “Second, he is a great deal in, Boyles noted he is “‘Nothing short of excellence’
very familiar with building com- excited to deal with the department has been Kevin’s MO as a coach,”
munity and university relationships on a whole. McSwiney commented. “It’s been
and that’s an important part of the “I am really looking forward to his track record and his history.
direction we want to head. And the opportunity to try and impact I think he’s going to extend that
third, the way Kevin develops a the department on a greater level same philosophy and direction to
student athlete is exactly what we’re than I have in the past, to be the Dinos athletics as a whole.”
three lines free
It’s pie week, mother-fu...ﬁve bucks and R.I.P. Chad Johnson, who passed on ccGirl. Read the blog. Are you a real Can someone please define bum
GAUNTLET MARCH 13.08 19
Every French student I have met study-
I will hunt down your friends to shove later last Sat. after suffering a partial student? If so you’re my hero. running?! ing geology is cute. I have met only
some pie in their face. And I’m also stroke Fri. afternoon while doing what - ccGirl in training - dinos trackie one French geology student. Therefore,
running a section next week, so bring he loved, playing basketball. Now [Ass sweat. Swass, if you will. you are cute.
your TLF to MSC 319 or e-mail them our sixth man, you will be greatly La-Z-Boy sofa and chair for sale, in - TrottEd] - how’s that for logic?
to email@example.com. All missed. excellent condition. Dark brown in
submissions must include your name, - The Ballers color. There are two reasons to pie someone: To the guy dressed as Pooh Bear. Fuck
ID number, phone number and signa- - firstname.lastname@example.org 1) Your enjoyment. 2) My enjoyment. you man.
ture. Submissions judged to be sexist, F.S.: A black 1987 Acura Legend.
racist, homophobic or attacks of a per- 190,000 k.m.. 4 doors, auto transmis-
sonal nature will not be printed. sion, 4 new snow tires, etc. $500 or
O.B.O. E-mail me for more info.
“Might as well be over. Oh man it gets - email@example.com
better, I hope it gets better.”
- www.ChrisGheran.com Free good working condition Kelvinator
washer & 220v dryer with $20 delivery
Pour yourself a rye whiskey and cheers fee. Free king size double pillow-top
to the continued leadership of Taft and mattress - used less than 1 yr with $20
Mason, the only two men in this prov- delivery fee. Reply to perchloroethyle
ince “special” enough to keep “special firstname.lastname@example.org.
ed” in ofﬁce. The republic lives on.
- students for the suppression of social- To All Those Frustrated Friends Who
ist propaganda Complain About Their Frustrating
Classmates: While I realize that you
It’s fairly obvious, since Richard Nixon, are paying x amount of money for
that there is no such thing as a fair deal the x amount of hours spent in class,
for any voter in the United States— you need to put life into perspective
You’re just not gonna get it. It’s a joke before you place angry rants in the
—the people that you vote for, they’re TLF... what’s more important, peace
the next best thing to criminals. But of of mind, or an ulcer caused by exces-
course they have money for advertising sive negative mental energy!? Besides,
campaigns that make them look a little your really killing my mellow!”
bit better than they actually are. - Mellow-Yellow
- Frank Zappa [Ahhhh, no. The answer is deﬁnitely
shut the fuck up in class. Mellow out
Doing homework on production night somewhere else dammit.
is a lot like studying for a big exam with - StressEd]
a good friend. You go in with the best
of intentions but just end up smoking Tired of the Calgary winter? Study
pot and watching Hero. abroad!
Want a chance to win tickets to the
Junos? Enter the Doritos(r) Red Mile Safe and Sound self-defense training,
Window Painting Challenge! Level One! Mar. 29, 2 p.m. to 6 p.m.
- jill.rutherford@ﬂeishman.ca Sponsored by Campus Security. Abso-
lutely free for students/staff; sign up
Sexy Stalin, the Burt Reynolds of at Campus Recreation (limited spaces
We all know we came from apes....but Dear (my)UofC,
Darwin came more often. Oracle buying out Peoplesoft and sub-
- Historical Hottie bing in their logo is not a “cosmetic
change only,” nor is it “subtle.” Yes, we
To the cute red head in Math 253 that know what a “corporate takeover” is.
doesn’t really go that much: I want to Show us some respect, please.
do bad things to you
- tall and lanky. There is a poignant generosity associ-
ated with losing an item; a divine plea-
To the bubbly blonde in religious stud- sure from another’s gain through your
ies 200 I like you. Come to the Den misstep. Sure, tell that to the bastard
on Thu. You make me want to be a with my stuff.
better person. - thedrewskii
[The same dude wrote both this and
the last one. Green Drinks is an open-format, no-
- OutEd] agenda, monthly social event for those
interested in the environment to get
To the rad red head with big head together, meet with friends, meet new
phones that lurks Earth Sciences/I.C.T. people, or learn something new.
lets skateboard, I love you. - environment.meetup.com/122
[Shit...this one too. And really, trying
to pick up a girl who ‘lurks’... Dearest Matrix, if you squirt toothpaste
- CheatEd] in my eye, I will have to tell you to lick
my vaa-gine. Sincerely,
To all the bitches that whine about - HalfPint.
others within your classes whether it
be asking too many questions, talking, Stan, don’t you know the ﬁrst law of
whatever. Man up. It’s 2008, stop being physics? Anything that’s fun costs at
a pussy and say it their face. least eight dollars.
-S - Trey Parker
[But it used to be seven. Hear me Den,
An outgoing and energetic person bring back the good old days!!!
is needed to help the John Petro- - LiquorEd]
poulous Memorial Fund with public
awareness/education campaign. Go to If you think tar sands are bad, try nuclear
www.jpmf.ca/volunteer.php for more reactors for hell on earth.
info or contact Ian at email@example.com. - www.nuclearfreealberta.ca
A “I have Rights?”, Student Rights Did you know that the Senate Fund
101 presentation will occur at noon Development Committee seeks ways
on Tuesday, Mar. 25 in MSC’s Bianca and means to support scholarships and
conference room. The presentation is bursaries and is helping to raise funds
co-facilitated by Counselling Services to build International House on the
and the S.U. Student Rights Ofﬁce. U of C campus?
Dear Harvey, Didn’t get a chance to talk about any-
To let you know, there’s a few trees thing other the high altitude squash
by Craigie that I think you forgot to cut balls, going to be playing next week?
down. Oh wait...there they go now. - High Squash Player
[But maybe they can be made into
books and then put in the library. To that smokin hot girl in rels 397, I
- PulpEd] heard it was your 20th Birthday this
week and I just wanted to say Happy
6R you’re pretty ballin’. Birthday! I hope you had a great day
- sweet dude and made an awesome wish when you
[Help ﬁght cancer, be baldin’. blew out your candles...
- ScarEd] - Sofa
20 MARCH 13.08 GAUNTLET
Editor: Geoff MacIntosh—firstname.lastname@example.org photo
GAUNTLET PHOTO MARCH 13.08 21
Chris Tait Joyce Wong
22 MARCH 13.08 GAUNTLET
Editor: Ryan Pike—email@example.com
Improvising a lifetime with a stranger
U of C alumna returns to town with a unique show
B l i n d D a t e in a way, it’s kind of a repeat,” she
notes. “So we cut the second half
t h e a t r e p r e v i e w and he went on and did his own
thing and I kept doing Blind Date.
Ryan Pike I don’t know if I’ve ever asked him
Entertainment Editor how he felt about it. He’s never said
anything and he knows I’m doing a
n the quest for companion- long version of it now. It’s work. I
ship, occasionally people have a very, very weird job.”
resort to drastic measures. Since relocating from Calgary to
One of the most commonly-used Toronto seven years ago, Northan
ways of looking for love is the blind has been busy—appearing on This
date. University of Calgary alumna Hour is Minutes, the CTV series
Rebecca Northan has returned to Alice, I Think and films like Mr.
her roots at Loose Moose Theatre Margorium’s Wonder Emporium, in
to present a show dedicated to the addition to a few plays. She credits
pleasantries and pratfalls of court- her diverse skillset with allowing
ship with Blind Date. her to stay busy.
Originally performed at the “I’m very lucky in that I’ve never,
Spiegeltent’ntavern at Toronto’s knock on wood, had a regular job,”
Luminato Festival, Blind Date fea- she says. “I’ve always worked in
tured Northan selecting gentlemen the arts. Part of what helps me
from the audience and improvising get through, though, is that my
a date based on their interactions. umbrella of the arts is really big
Northan recalls that she came up with and wide. If I’m teaching improv,
the idea for the show on the fly. I am working at my craft. If I’m
“My friend Tina Rasmussen, teaching a corporate workshop
who’s also a U of C grad, runs or writing a script for a corpo-
the performing arts division of rate client, I’m still scriptwriting,
courtesy Rebecca Northan
Harbourfront Centre [where the which is still taking what I know
Spiegeltent is located] so she booked Despite being all smiles and sunshine, clowns still get sad when they get stood up. and applying it to someone else’s
me in there and said, ‘come up with world. I’m just charging way more
something’,” says Northan. “I went “Night after night, total strang- to take events of her own life and “I have two rules, maybe three,” money for it.”
and watched the show and thought, ers would come out of the audience an audience member’s to make the says Northan. “[They’re] kind of Following Blind Date, Northan
‘there are pretty girls taking their and make out with me and let me show different every night. like the rules for being a good heads to Montreal to film four epi-
clothes off and circus perform- take their shirts off and they would “My thought was, everyone’s date: make sure they’re having a sodes of a new series for Showcase
ers and singers. It kind feels like hump me on a table while peo- been on a blind date so we all good time, don’t humiliate them called The Selkirk Foundation,
a sexy circus environment, but ple screamed, applauded, whistled know how to act on a blind date,” and be willing to adapt to what they directed by NUTV alumnus Mike
there are no clowns. So maybe and went crazy,” she remembers. “I she says. “Everybody’s met your say or do.” Dowse. In the meantime, she’s
I’ll do a sexy clown with some bur- thought, ‘This is really weird. I can’t significant other’s parents for The nature of Blind Date may looking forward to returning to
lesque thrown in there’.” believe people are agreeing to this.’ the first time or you’ve moved raise a few eyebrows, but there’s one her improv roots at Loose Moose
The initial version of Blind Date It was really fun and became the in for the first time or you’ve person that doesn’t seem bothered and the challenge of Blind Date.
was only minutes long and, one of the highlight acts of the tent. had your first fight as a couple. by Northan going on dates every “It could be absolutely amazing
due to its location in the caba- Then I got to wondering if I could Can I bring somebody up on stage night—her husband. Northan’s and it could be a total car accident,”
ret-like Spiegeltent, Northan was go longer, if I could spread out all and get them to play with me. Can beau, also an actor, was originally admits Northan. “But people kind
able to inject a certain amount the burlesquey, naughty stuff and I access their personal script?” the centrepiece of the second part of like that as humans. We like the
of sauciness into the proceed- put in some life stuff as well.” Despite the on-the-fly nature of the original Blind Date as a blind huge, nasty failures just as much as
ings. As such, a typical install- The expansion of Blind Date from of Blind Date, the circus act man intended to be her original date we like the successes.”
ment featured complete strangers a -minute show spanning a single does operate with a small net. that didn’t show up.
being fed chocolates by her, slow evening to a -minute experience In this case, Northan has a set “He was in on it from the begin-
Blind Date runs each Fri. and Sat. at Loose Moose’s
dancing with her or perhaps spanning a lifetime is obviously a of guidelines she maintains to ning and then we decided it doesn’t theatre at Crossroads Market from Mar. 14–29 at
escalating into more physicality. large undertaking. Northan aims ensure that everyone has fun. really need the second half because 10:30 p.m. Tickets are $15.
Filmmaking doesn’t always cost mad coin
$ 1 0 0 F i l m F e s t Well, the Calgary Society for Independent
Filmmakers wants to bring that back old-
Despite the now-international flavour
to the festival, there’s still very much a
filmmakers has even begun to explore an
important aspect of our own Calgarian life,
t h e a t r e p r e v i e w fashioned, do-or-die attitude with the local edge. With films from across Canada, using a comedic concept to make us question
Film Festival’s super-sweet this coming including animation from Halifax, America our own prejudices.
Jordyn Marcellus weekend. Although the rules have changed— and Europe there’s an impressive sense of “There are a lot of themes that the pro-
E&P Editor it originally started out as a local competition cohesion in the festival. Varied locations gramming community and I picked up on,”
for filmmakers to make films under —it also mean varied styles of film—not only explains Jacobson. “Quite a few films deal
An old filmmaker in his rocking chair, has now blossomed as a showcase for both will short films be on display, but animated with living in an urban environment. There’s
slowly swaying back and forth discuss- international and Canadian short films. shorts as well. a local film called Madeline and the Wrong
ing the practice of making movies on the “The budget limits were a hundred dollars “These films are coming from all over the Part of Town [by Farrah Alladin and Alex
classic mm film stock. As he sits in his for the first few years when [the festival] was world,” says Jacobson. “There’s animation Mitchell] which is a send-up of how [we’re]
rocking chair, reminiscing about the good focused solely on Super mm film,” explains from Halifax that was done through the like at Calgary’s downtown inner core. It’s
ol’ days of grabbing an old Super camera Film Festival co-ordinator Melody Atlantic Filmmakers Co-Operative. There’s about a housewife who wants to go to a sale
and shooting to the heart’s content. As Jacobson. “When we allowed mm films also stop-motion animation from Austrailia downtown but is frightened because of the
he slowly puffs on his pipe, he bemoans into the festival, we got rid of the budgetary that is really cool. It’s quite amazing.” people who live downtown, the ‘scary’ ones
a lack of films that disregard the desire limit. They’re all still low-budget films and These filmmakers all explore different fac- that are really marginalized.”
to make money and just try to use their it’s still important for people to know that ets of their own lives, from environmental Another prevalent theme throughout
budgetary limitations to their benefits. they can make films for under .” sustainability to memory. One of the local many of the short films is the concept
GAUNTLET ENTERTAINMENT MARCH 13.08 23
Dancing on the
M a i n S t a g e
d a n c e p r e v i e w
fter a three-month hiber- Nooshin Esmaeili/The Gauntlet
nation, the dancers at the With the other choreographers
University of Calgary are for the show, Kloetzel has helped
starting to creep out of their studios to develop a program that can be
and into the University Theatre to described as a commentary on
present their latest Mainstage Dance contemporary culture. The ballet
show. by Lindsay Walsh examines the
The dancers have spent hours a concept of incessant internal noise,
day for the past several weeks in while Kloetzel delves into the realm
preparation for the show, which is of the fairytale for her number.
typically one of the most popular Each piece has taken some time to
fine arts events at the university. research and coordinate, but the
Amongst the dedicated crew of time to execute actual performances
movement specialists is artistic is fairly limited.
director Melanie Kloetzel, who “I’ve been exploring the idea of
promises another fantastic and the fairytale for about a year now,”
eclectic year for the Mainstage says Kloetzel. “This comes together
Dance production. remarkably quickly. People always
“The show has five professional prefer a little more time as artists, but
choreographers that come from all it comes with the job and you just
around the world,” says Kloetzel. have to roll with the punches.”
“It’s a nice mix. Three of the chore- Choreography requires research
ographers are doing contemporary and a relentless attention to details
[dances], one is doing ballet and one that include not only physical move-
is doing hip hop.” ments, but aesthetic consideration as
In addition to being the artistic well. The dancers have costumes in
director of the show, Kloetzel is also which they perform on original sets
the choreographer of one of the under a variety of lights with diverse
contemporary numbers alongside musical accompaniment.
her colleagues Milan Kozànek and “The sets for this particular eve-
Wojciech Mochniej. Rounding out ning are quite impressive,” says
the roster of choreographers is ballet Koetzel. “They were designed by
choreographer Lindsay Walsh and each choreographer with the help
hip-hop artist Tara Wilson. Kloetzel of University Theatre Services.”
is still a relatively new addition to With all the pieces in their right
the U of C Dance faculty, but has place, Mainstage Dance
an impressive history of experience promises to be an exciting event
including time as the Director of on campus. Spring is in the air, so
Dance at Idaho State University. take a step out of your burrows and
“Since I’m the brand-new faculty head on down to the University
member, I became artistic director Theatre this week to see the danc-
for the show,” explains Kloetzel. “I ers roll with the punches, kicks, lock
had a dance company in New York steps and pirouettes.
for about seven years. I’ve been a
choreographer and a performer
Mainstage Dance is unveiled in the University
for quite a long time and I have Theatre Mar. 13–15. Tickets are available at
been a director many a time.” Campus Ticket Centre.
of memory. While time heals shot and these snowflake things as
all wounds, time also helps well. It’s absolutely gorgeous.”
to frost over memories and With the advent of digital film-
make them blurry and unclear, making and micro DV tapes, the
something explored by the short roots of filmmaking are slowly
film Mechanical Memory by being forgotten. mm and mm
Amanda Dawn Christie. film, and the wondrously rich grain
“It’s made from old super mm it can produce, is slowly becoming
footage that was shot by her father,” but a memory. That doesn’t mean
explains Jacobson. “She found it, that directors are willing to forget
but there was a fungus growing this important medium. To see it
on the film. When she went to featured on the big screen is a rare
print the film using an optical opportunity indeed.
printer to blow it up to mm,
the fungus ended up looking
like snowflakes when it was on The $100 Film Festival plays at the Plaza
Thu., Mar. 15 through Sat., Mar. 17. Screenings
screen. While you watch the film, start at 7 p.m., and with tickets at $10 with student
you see the images that her father ID and $12 otherwise.
24 MARCH 13.08 GAUNTLET ENTERTAINMENT
Modern culture is in the mix
the urge to put every moment of real cultural traditions left.
their life to music. Anomie, the feeling of hopeless-
Whole groups of young people ness caused by a removal of values,
have spent their lives soundtracking has begun to cause a real sense of
Jordyn Marcellus their years to tunes. The character of detachment, which is why some-
Rob in Nick Hornby’s High Fidelity thing so simple as the creation of
is the perfect example. In the film a mix CD is actually important in
housands of young, socially version, one of his relationships the age of internet pseudo-intellec-
inept, bohemian men and started when he gave a fan of his DJ tualism. While it’s presumptuous to
women have spent their sets a mix tape. Every major breakup call something like making a CD full
singlehood hunched over their has a song associated with it. of your favourite tunes a cultural
tape machines trying to get the Outside of film, young bands tradition, it helps people connect
perfect playlist of unpretentious like Los Campesinos! have songs with one another.
pop, esoteric rock and songs of entitled “It Started With a Mix” Sharing the latest and greatest
unrequited longing to reflect their about hand-lettered track listings, tunes allows for people to also
heart’s dearest desires. Essayist and trying to make the perfect mix CD share an intimate moment with
poet Geoffrey O’Brien called the mix for someone and how every relation- one another. Even though we are not
tape, “the most widely practiced ship inevitably seems to start when a our taste in music and movies—no
American artform.” Anyone can CD changes hand from boy to girl. though, millions will open their to make it seem like the creator is matter what the bearded alt-rock
do it. There’s nothing to it except Why is there such a pop cultural ears to your mix tape—not just in with the cool new tracks. It’s demagogues would tell us—the con-
a music collection, a few hours of obsession with mix tapes? It’s that sweet-hearted girl you met the perfect mix, because everyone nection over a shared love of one
your time and a recipient who’ll simple: it’s a common, shared expe- at a Belle and Sebastian concert. can connect over the music whole particular song can help build long-
hopefully understand the deeper rience for many young men and Braff attributed the success of the groups of young men and women lasting friendships or strengthen
message in the mix. women in the First World. From ludicrously-popular Garden State have spent their time trading the CD burgeoning romantic ones. It’s
According to website Art of the first mix CD made for that really soundtrack to the phenomenon in back and forth, chattering on about why couples have “songs.”
the Mix, there are many different pretty girl in English class who dug an IGN Music interview. The Shins or Frou Frou. This con- People who argue against pre-
kinds of mix tapes. You’ve got your that t-shirt you were wearing to the “Essentially, [I made] a mix CD nection between music is why the tension—who are inevitably a bit
traditional go-to standards like the jaded hipster dude who asks—with with all of the music that I felt was mix tape is so popular. At worst, it pretentious themselves—think it’s
romance mix, the breakup playlist a cocked eye and a sneer—for the scoring my life at the time I was writ- can be a conversation starter; at best, moronic to make each other mix CDs
or the road trip tape. Of special latest shit-hot tunes, whole groups ing the screenplay,” he explained. an admission of puppy-dog love. and it’s just some wanky exercise
note is the subcategory involving of people think of their lives by the Listening to the soundtrack at In a society where people are in musical snobbery. More often
romance: the foreplay mix, the labels of their favourite mixes. least once through is almost a right becoming less connected with than not, that isn’t the case. Some
coital mix and the after-sex mix. Now that these young people of passage nowadays for anyone one another, where Facebook express themselves through art,
Of course, these are self-parodying are starting to come of age, they’ve interested in independent music. and text messages are the way through dance or through their
jokes about a very real phenomenon: begun to move their self-created It’s so patently un-offensive that to breakup with someone or ask writing, the creation of a mix—a
The strangely obsessive habit that playlists to their jobs. When you’re it can appeal to everyone’s musical out that hottie that you’ve met good solid mix tape—helps reveal
some people have where they feel someone like Scrubs actor Zach Braff tastes, but with enough indie cred a couple times, there are very few something about the creator.
GAUNTLET ENTERTAINMENT MARCH 13.08 25
Ain’t that a kick in the face?
Great ﬁghts, bad writing give ﬁlm a black eye
f i l m r e v i e w
hen a sport reaches a
certain level of popu-
larity, it’s natural for
Hollywood to latch on and make
a film about it. Hockey had The
Mighty Ducks, stock car racing had
Days of Thunder and competitive
cheerleading had Bring It On. Now,
with mixed martial arts purport-
edly the fastest-growing sport on
the continent, Never Back Down
has kicked down the doors of
local multiplexes. Unfortunately,
it lacks the prestige of its spiritual
Immediately, the audience is
introduced to Iowa teen Jake Tyler.
Plagued by guilt over his father’s
death and subsequently unable to
control his anger, Tyler’s been
tossed out of numerous schools.
When his tennis prodigy brother
gets into an exclusive school in Shirtless men ﬁght each other in parking lots in Never Back Down.
Florida, the Tyler family is on the
move. Tyler’s rage issues come the film takes place on patios, in ing make it so that the audience sters that appeared on The O.C.
in handy when he discovers the clubs or in parking lots. The audi- can’t wait to see people get punched and Smallville, along with two-
underground fighting ring being ence is led to believe that, while in the face. Thankfully, the fights time Academy Award nominee
run by his new classmate, Ryan hockey players aspire towards kick in early and often. Director Jeff Djimon Hounsou. Everyone plays
McCarthy. Following a humiliating the Olympics or the NHL, mixed Wadlow and writer Chris Hauty their roles well enough, given
beatdown, Tyler is taken under the martial artists train simply to be seem to be fairly clueless about the writing, but the entire film
wing of a local trainer Jean Roqua proficient in committing felonious the sport itself, but they know ends up feeling like the demented
(Djimon Hounsou) and aims to get assault outside of any sanctioning how to pace the film and the final lovechild of The O.C. and the UFC.
even with McCarthy. body. Stranger still, none of the fight is an effective centrepiece. A Despite featuring some exciting
The presentation of the sport guys in any of the fights are mak- romantic subplot involving Tyler fight sequences and stylish pre-
of mixed martial arts in Never ing any money from them, so the and McCarthy’s ex-girlfriend Baja sentation, it’s like a movie about
Back Down is fairly paradoxical. vast majority of men in Never Back (Amber Heard) is also included, aspiring basketball players ending
The men who train in Roqua’s Down are simply headcases who but fills the screen with awkward with their triumph being playing
gym are all shown as well-trained like to hurt people. situations and tremendously laugh- in someone’s driveway.
and dedicated, but it’s never really On the other hand, the fights able dialogue.
shown what they’re training for. themselves are the best parts of Never Back Down is brought
In fact, every bit of fighting in the film. The direction and writ- to life by a strange mix of young- Never Back Down is in theatres Fri., Mar. 14.
26 MARCH 13.08 GAUNTLET ENTERTAINMENT
spun ALBUM REVIEWS
L os Campesinos is one of the new bands of 2008 that really has a chance
to explode onto the music scene. Whereas most albums that appeal to a
wide variety of tastes are calculating shit meant to sell records, Hold on Now,
Youngster is a relatively unique album in the genre of typically overly-cute
and sentimental indie pop.
The group, a seven-member band from Wales, has all the trappings for a band
that would be an absolute aural mess. Violin, glockenspiel and keyboards are all
on display with the usual indie rock instrumentation. It’s a very easy formula to
fuck up. Too-loud guitar, too much violin or poor mixing of the instruments
will make songs come across as messy and unfocused. It’s a miracle when any
band balances it. On tracks like “You! Me! Dancing!” or “My Year in Lists”
the philosophy of “less is more” creates a simplistic, but surprisingly layered,
Where the musicianship is apt, the lyrics are a surprising element to the album.
Singer and glockenspielist Gareth Campesinos’ lyrics come across as blog poetry.
People may ﬁnd it indulgent, but given the strong history of Brit bands navel-
Los Campesinos! gazing at their own little bohemian culture—see similar acts like Ballboy or Ten
Hold On Now, Youngster Grand—there’s a precedence for these kinds of lyrics. They aren’t cloying and
(Arts & Crafts) are for the most part earnest, which actually complements the music.
Ultimately, Hold on Now, Youngster is for the crowd of young men and women
who sit on their computers for days on end looking for the most esoteric musical
act and for those that spend their days making shitty YouTube videos of their
favourite band’s songs. With musical adeptness and clever and entertaining
lyrics, this group will deﬁnitely be in the running for Best New Band of ’08.
Apparently, mixing sangria, pee buckets and and bass are cut with accentuated guitar riffs,
abandoned houses produces something sur- making for a plodding, defeated feel.
prising: Ladyhawk’s sophomore album, Shots. After taking a trip through Driediger’s slow
To be more accurate, the Vancouver-based despair, “You Ran” kicks the tempo up with
rocker group recorded the album in a dishev- driven drums, distorted guitar and chorus-
elled house in their hometown of Kelowna like vocals that leads into the creeping 10 and
over the course of two weeks, which deﬁnitely a half minute ending track, “Ghost Blues.”
comes across in the scrappy-yet-emotional The listener is left with a deﬁnite impression
sound of the tracks. as the ﬁrst slow, mellow song melds into a
Starting off the CD is the heavy “I Don’t shredding shufﬂe jam session with various
Always Know What You’re Saying.” Low- solos and powerful vocals fading off into an
key verses set a dark scene and ﬂow into the understated acoustic ﬁnish.
Ladyhawk more intense choruses, featuring frontman With Shots, Ladyhawk creates a nuanced
Shots Duffy Driediger’s loud, in-your-face words slice of disaffected depression. Catchy rock
(Jagjaguwar) led by explosive drum ﬁlls. tracks and slowed down bluesy ballads convey
“Faces Of Death” takes the album down a all the feelings of the album with refreshing
different road, with Driediger ﬂoating into the variety.
track with a muted distortion. Minimal drums ..Amanda Hu
Coming at you with more energy than a Tas- transitions between the two types.
manian devil on Red Bull and ecstasy, Protest Despite notably stellar individual tracks such
The Hero’s newest disc, Fortress, presents an as “Sequioa Throne” and “Bone Marrow,”
exquisite assault on your ear drums. Fortress is best enjoyed in a single, long
Following their 2005 debut full-length Kezia, listen. The songs blend together well thanks
Whitby, Ontario’s favourite rebellious sons to frequent tempo changes and instrumen-
take the high-octane, guitar-driven punk tal sections, often pushing the boundaries of
that made them famous and added a layer both the metal and punk genres by seam-
of metal. The constant whine of blister- lessly incorporating uncharacteristic piano
ing note changes on guitar are even faster or synth parts. The end result is a uniquely
this time around, accompanied by more fantastic blend of accelerated, talented and
frantic, heavier drumming. The biggest intricately-arranged music that comes easily
Protest the Hero progression for this outing from Hero accessible to metalheads and punkers alike.
Fortress easily comes from frontman Rody Walker, Protest the Hero sets the bar high with For-
(Underground Operations) whose expanded vocal range now includes tress and it will be interesting to see if they
deeper growls and screams to supplement can follow it up.
his quick, high-pitched singing, seamlessly ..Derek Neumeier
Because of the involvement of the CRTC in regu- uneven. Opening with three songs that blur
lating Canadian radio, there’s been a seeming together, the album would’ve ﬂowed better
bias against Canadian bands. The rationale is opening with the energetic title track and
that because of needing to broadcast a certain heading into “Feel the Pain” rather than
amount of Canadian content, undeserving lingering as it does. The same troubles return
bands from the country get played over their at the end of the album, as “End of the Line”
more-talented foreign counterparts. is a fantastic way to close, but is followed by
Even so, CRTC rules can get “undeserving” two more songs.
bands on the radio, but they can’t make The Trews’ latest offering, No Time for Later, is
them popular. The Trews have taken the the musical equivalent of a bonsai tree—there’s
opportunity presented to them by Canadian something great in there somewhere, but it
radio and turned it into a pair of success- needs a great deal of pruning to get to it. As it
The Trews ful albums. Their third, No Time for Later, stands, The Trews have produced a textbook
No Time For Later seems poised for similar success, although example of a B-/C+ album. Nothing is done
(Bumstead Productions) it’s fairly ﬂawed. badly and the album is an effortless listen, but
The most glaring misstep on No Time for Later it’s far from exemplary.
is the album’s pacing. In short, it’s frightfully ..Ryan Pike
escapes & pursuits GAUNTLET MARCH 13.08 27
Editor: Jordyn Marcellus—firstname.lastname@example.org
THEATRE Lint, Women, and the Neighborhood Spirit of the West squeals into THINGS TO DO
Council create a cosmopolitan Flames Central to burn it down to 1 The week of has-beens. The lead singer from
Norville plays at the Vertigo Theatre atmosphere at Broken City Thu., the ground Mon., Mar. 17 at 4 p.m.
Foreigner, the former lead guitarist of Kiss,
Mar. 13–30 at 7:30 p.m., dark on Mar. 13 at 8 p.m. Tickets available Tickets are $20 at Ticketmaster.
Avril Lavigne, and so much more. They’re all
Mon. Tickets are $36 at the box Megatunes and Sloth Records.
ofﬁce. Martina McBride square-dances at
around town, so go watch the falling stars as
Ace Frehley, the original guitarist the Pengrowth Saddledome Mon., they try to eke out some money from their
Beauty and the Beast roars at the for Kiss blasts into Flames Central Mar. 17 at 7 p.m. Tickets are $40–$70 former star status.
Max Bell Arena Mar. 12 until Apr. 20. to melt some faces Fri., Mar. 14 at at Ticketmaster. 2. St. Paddy’s Day. It’s time to get drunk and
Tickets are $43–$56 at Ticketmaster. 8 p.m. Tickets are $37–$49.50 at obnoxious. Check out the cab on Sat. night, or
Ticketmaster. Daniel Wesley plays a set at the just go to the Den for a $4.25 pint of Rickards.
Ben Hur rolls into the Crossroads Gateway on SAIT Campus Tue., 3. Go play outside. It’s still incredibly warm out,
Market Mar. 13–15 at 8 p.m. Tickets Left Spine Down, Hydraulic Empire, Mar. 18 at 8 p.m. Tickets are $5 at and it looks to be staying that way. Grab your
are regularly priced at $18, $15 for and Data.Disko burn down the Ticketmaster and the door.
bike and hit the ol’ dusty trails.
students at the door. Underground Fri., Mar. 14 at 8 p.m.
4. Study. March Madness continues—from
Tickets available at Megatunes and Tons of Fun University performs at
Go on an improvised Blind Date Sloth. the Nickle Arts Museum Tue.,
essays, group projects and the dreaded mid-
Mar. 14 and 15 at 10:30 p.m. in the Mar. 18 at 8 p.m. Tickets are term it’s time to crack open the books and cry.
Crossroads Market. Tickets are $15 Serj Tankian comes-a-callin’ to Mac $12.50–$15 at Ticketmaster.
at the door. Hall Sat., Mar. 15 at 7 p.m. Tickets
are $29.50 at Ticketmaster. Attire is
jean jackets and combat boots.
Alberta Sessions: Friend of Otis,
Heather Blush, Ship Shape, and SPORTS MISC.
Avril Lavigne is at the Pengrowth J.W. Hannam is a display of Albertan Fans of lacrosse can check out the The Dinos Soccer Team holds the
Saddledome Thu., Mar. 13 at Systatic, Melody Unwinding musical talent at the Engineered Air Calgary Roughnecks as they try Mean and Green St. Patty’s Day
7:30 p.m. Tickets are $55–$149 at and Stoning Mary break into the Theatre Wed., Mar. 19 at 8 p.m. to make the Colorado Mammoth cab Sat., Mar. 15 starting at 8 p.m.
Ticketmaster. You know what to do. Underground for some mad riffs Tickets are $13.50–$18 at extinct Fri., Mar. 14 at 7:30 p.m. in The tickets are $5 in advance in the
Sat., Mar. 15 at 8 p.m. Tickets Ticketmaster. the Pengrowth Saddledome. Tickets Kinesiology B atrium or $7 at the
Noted hair metal badass Lou Gramm available at Megatunes and Sloth. are $29–$59 at Ticketmaster. door.
rocks the fucking house at the Back Armin Van Buuren does a set up
Alley Thu., Mar. 13 at 8 p.m. Tickets Jig for a Kiss hits up the Gateway on at Tantra Wed., Mar. 19 at 8 p.m. The Calgary Hitmen try to garrote In honour of the Irish lads and lasses,
are $30 at Ticketmaster. SAIT campus Sat., Mar. 15 at 8 p.m. Tickets are $39.95 at Ticketmaster. the Kootenay Ice à la 1950s maﬁa the SU is holding the St. Paddy’s
Tickets are available at Ticketmaster assassins Sun., Mar. 15 at 5 p.m. in Day Hoolie in the Den and Black
The lead singer of Our Lady Peace, and at the door. Kisses probably Angelique Kidjo plays at the Jack the Pengrowth Saddledome. Tickets Lounge all day. Pints of Rickards
Raine Maida, comes to Mac Hall aren’t going to be available at the Singer Concert Hall Wed., Mar. 19. are $20–$35 at Ticketmaster. Red, White, and Honey Brown are
Thu., Mar. 13 at 8 p.m. Tickets are door. Tickets are $38–$43 at Ticketmaster. $4.25 all day.
$29.50 at Ticketmaster. Old style shinny is back in vogue
Kristoff, Cruz-ae, Jeremy Ardor and Styx cashes in on their classics with the Oldtimers Hockey Cinemania continues with American
Zimmers Hole digs a pit in the Tristan Newton do their psychedelic Wed., Mar. 19 at the Snatch Rock ‘n’ Challenge at the Pengrowth Gangster in ST 148 Mon., Mar. 17
Republik Thu., Mar. 13 at 8 p.m. trance thing at the Soda Sat., Roll Lounge at 8 p.m. Tickets are $45 Saddledome Tue., Mar. 18 at 7 p.m. at 6:30 and 9 p.m. It’s free with your
Tickets are $17 at Ticketmaster. Mar. 15 at 8 p.m. $5 at the door. at Ticketmaster. Domo arigato. Tickets are $15–$30 at Ticketmaster. student I.D. and there is $2 popcorn.
comics GAUNTLET MARCH.13.08 28
Editor: Paul Baker—email@example.com