Rules and etiquette for baby showers Everyone enjoys a baby shower, from the creative games and activities to the gifts and refreshments. However, no one should ever feel obligated to bring a gift, and some may feel offended if you have more than one. So how do you please everyone? If you are a first time mom, it is common and helpful to have a baby shower. Here are some rules: If no one throws you a baby shower, don't get offended. You and your mom or friend can plan one together. Ask if they'd like to help plan and then add them to the "Host/Hostess" slot on the baby shower. Don't add your registries on the baby shower invitation. This makes people feel obligated to buy you something. Instead, when someone calls to RSVP, you can mention your registries if they ask what you need, but be sure to tell them they aren't obligated to bring a gift. It is typical to throw a baby shower one to two months before your expected due date. This allows for time for the mommy-to-be to return the items that are duplicates and organize the nursery from everything she was given. Although many things have changed, in general men were not invited to baby showers except for the husband/partner toward the end to help open presents. Now, co-ed baby showers are starting to become more common. If you're looking for a traditional baby shower, only invite your girl friends and family. Second baby showers are becoming increasingly common, however sometimes they aren't necessary. Sometimes when second baby showers are acceptable are: If your second baby is of the opposite gender than the first. Even if you bought gender neutral things before, you will still need clothes, diapers and wipes! You may not need the more expensive items such as bottles, swing and high chair, but if you didn't buy gender neutrally, you will need those items. If there has been a considerable amount of time between the first and second (or third, etc.). After 5 years, most baby equipment, such as car seats, high chairs and baby beds are not recommended for use. Also, you may have gotten rid of your baby stuff from the previous baby, hand have to start from scratch again. If this is your first baby with someone new. If you are remarried or in a new relationship than the last time you had a baby, it is acceptable to have a baby shower. For many reasons, but specifically for the new family members and friends to be able to participate. If you are thrown a "necessity shower". Necessity showers are thrown if someone already has a little one, between one and three years old and has almost everything. Guests are invited to bring diapers, wipes and other necessities that run out and eat your money quickly. If you are thrown a surprise shower. Surprise showers can be fun and come in all shapes and sizes. Some surprise showers are just for a few friends and family who want to get together to to gift small presents, and some showers can be themed, if the host/hostess has the time and energy to plan to do so.