While anger is a normal human emotion that deserves release every now and then, it is important to
keep anger under control to prevent untoward consequences. Many people can handle anger
reasonably, but some just can't.
To the people who find their anger always exploding, to the point of hurting others' feelings or even to
the point of physical injury, anger management is vital. It is indeed possible to manage anger, as many of
us have already done, so that we can still express anger in a form that won't dominate our lives or harm
our relationships with others.
Anger, in itself, is not a bad form of emotion. It is normal to react angrily under some circumstances. If
you've been treated improperly or you felt that others have been unfair to you, you can become
rightfully angry. Management of anger deals with the behaviors that we exhibit when we're angry.
For instance, it is acceptable to raise our voices if someone has wronged us. However, if it becomes
repetitive to the extent that others become afraid of us or view us as unapproachable, then no matter
how legitimate our grievances are, we have lost.
Again, hitting objects sometimes results from outbursts of anger, but if it becomes habitual or if we
resort to hitting other people, then we have to cool it down and manage it.
There are some common misconceptions regarding anger management, and let us deal with them one
• While anger shouldn't be suppressed, letting anger out in an aggressive manner isn't a healthy
alternative, especially if actually directed towards people.
• Next, there are some people who use anger as a means of gaining respect. That does not hold up,
because anger is very unlikely to gain respect; it is more likely to foster fear and distrust.
• Regarding management, there are people who think that anger can't be managed. Anger can indeed
be managed; we can always choose the way in which we express anger.
• Finally, anger is something that some of us think should be suppressed. That is unrealistic. Suppression
of anger is impossible; it will emerge when we are pushed hard. The possibility of getting angry often
leads us to the issue of expressing it properly.
Before we explore how to manage anger properly, we should examine the consequences of anger that
isn't controlled or managed well. Everything is ruin.
• We ruin our relationships with significant others, whom we may be hurting physically or emotionally
because of improperly controlled anger.
• We ruin our relationships with friends and colleagues, because we become intimidating and scary with
our anger; we don't come across as someone who is nice to work with.
• Lastly, improperly expressed anger ruins us - physically and mentally. We become stressed often, thus
increasing the risk for heart disease, diabetes, stroke, and a host of other illnesses. We also become
unable to think well, concentrate properly, and resolve problems.
Now that we know the importance of keeping anger under intelligent control, it is now our job to follow
some anger management techniques. Here are some that we can follow:
• Make sure to know your behavioral signs of anger. When do you know that you are becoming angry
already? These signs will remind you that you are getting angry already, and at that moment you'll stop,
think, and find ways to express it constructively.
• Find ways to release anger. Get out of the situation that is making you angry. Then you can breathe
deeply, exercise, read a book, or listen to relaxing music. That way you can think about the situation in a
more focused manner.
• Find out what makes you angry. Do you find it difficult to concede on issues or to accept divergent
viewpoints? Do you fear something or are you guilty of something and you're just using anger to cover it
up? Analyze your feelings well so that you don't have to resort to getting angry all the time.