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					            Welcome

Elaboration: Strategic Teaching
 To Improve Student Writing at
     the Intermediate level

                  with

             Deanna Carter
    Literacy Curriculum Coordinator
    CarterdE@edmonds.wednet.edu
                 #7014
                                      1
                   .
               Purpose

    To share teaching strategies that will help
students develop a piece of writing that
elaborates on a single focus, provides
specific details and examples, and addresses
the needs and interests of a particular
audience.
    Elaboration is one of the most critical
aspects needed to create clear and effective
writing.

                                                  2
    Agenda
• Updates from OSPI - New Writing GLEs
    Why Elaboration?
    What about Six Trait Writing?
•   Six strategies to support Elaboration
•   Show, don’t Tell
•   Asking questions that lead to Elaboration
•   General versus Specific Language
•   Assessment for Elaboration
•   Instructional support materials
                                                3
                    Alignment with GLEs - Writing
EALR 3. The student writes clearly and effectively
Component 3.1 Develops ideas and organizes writing
From GLE 3.1.1 - 4th Grade                   from GLE 3.1.1 - 5th Grade                        from GLE 3.1.1- 6th Grade
 Analyzes ideas, selects a narrow            Analyzes ideas, selects a narrow                   Analyzes ideas, selects a
topic, and elaborates using specific         topic, and elaborates using specific              manageable topic, and elaborates
details and/or examples.                     details and/or examples.                          using specific, relevant details
                                                                                               and/or examples.
Narrows topic ( e.g., from general topic,   Narrows topic with controlling idea (e.g.,
such as ”pets,” to specific topic, such as   from general topic, such as baseball, to          Narrows topic with controlling idea (e.g.,
“My dog is smart.”).                         specific topic, such as “The Mariners are my      thesis statement or sentence that states the
Selects details relevant to the topic to    favorite baseball team.”).                        narrowed topic – “The ancient Romans
elaborate (e.g., adds detail to each main    Selects details relevant to the topic to         contributed to technology in many ways.”).
point using more than one sentence; uses     extend ideas and develop elaboration (e.g.,       Selects details relevant to the topic to
specific words ad phrases, reasons,          specific words and phrases, reasons,              extend ideas and develop elaboration (e.g.,
anecdotes, facts, description, and           anecdotes, facts, descriptions, examples).        multiple examples, anecdotes, statistics).
examples).                                   Uses personal experiences, observations,         Uses personal experiences, observations,
Uses personal experiences, observations,    and research to support opinions and ideas        and research to support opinions and ideas
and/or research to support opinions and      (e.g., data relevant to the topic to support      (e.g., data relevant to the topic to support
ideas (e.g., collects, organizes, and uses   conclusions in math, science, or social           conclusions in mathematics, science, social
data to support conclusions in math,         studies; appropriate anecdotes to explain or      studies and literature; appropriate anecdotes
science, or social studies).                 persuade).                                        to explain or persuade).
Develops character, setting, and events     Varies method of developing character            Varies method of developing character
within plot when writing a narrative.        (e.g., dialogue) and setting (e.g., through the   (e.g., how the character looks, talks, acts,
                                             eyes of the character) in narratives.             and thinks) and setting (e.g., develops
                                                                                               setting as character changes location) in
                                                                                               narratives.
                                                                                                                                          4
                                           Alignment with GLEs – Writing continued

EALR 3. The student writes clearly and effectively
Component 3.2 Uses appropriate style
from GLE 3.2.2 4th grade                             From GLE 3.2.2 5th grade                              from GLE 3.2.2         6th grade
 Uses language appropriate for a                      Uses language appropriate for a                      Analyzes and selects language
specific audience and purpose.                       specific audience and purpose.                        appropriate for specific audiences and
                                                                                                           purposes.
Uses precise words (e.g., vivid verbs -             Uses precise language (e.g., powerful verbs,
screeched, hovered, absorbed; specific nouns -       specific descriptors).                                Selects and uses precise and specialized
granite, longhouse, cedar).                          Uses formal, informal, and specialized               language in content writing (e.g., hypothesis in
Uses specialized vocabulary in informational        language (e.g., photosynthesis, ratio, expedition)    both science and social studies, hydration in
writing (e.g., tessellate, parallelogram, butte,     appropriate for audience and purpose.                 health and fitness).
carbohydrate).                                       Uses literary and sound devices (e.g., simile,       Selects and uses literary devices (e.g., simile,
Uses literary and sound devices (e.g., simile,      personification, and rhythm).                         metaphor, and personification).
personification, and alliteration).

from GLE 3.2.3 4th grade                             From GLE 3.2.3 5th grade                                from GLE 3.2.3         6th grade
Uses a variety of sentences.                         Uses a variety of sentences.                          Uses a variety of sentences.

Writes a variety of sentence beginnings (e.g.,      Writes a variety of sentence lengths.                Writes a variety of sentence lengths.
starts with an introductory adverb clause: “If you   Writes a variety of sentence beginnings (e.g.,       Writes a variety of sentence structures (e.g.,
want to see ant up close, you should use a           starts with a participial phrase: “Laughing loudly,   uses phrases and clauses: “In the beginning, I
magnifying glass.”).                                 they walked down the hall.”).                         liked ice cream. That summer, after working at
Writes a variety of sentence lengths.               Writes a variety of sentence structures (e.g.,       the store, I didn’t want to eat ice cream again.”).
Writes a variety of sentence structures (e.g.,      “Tran, busy with his homework, didn’t hear the
“My dog enjoys music and howls when we listen        telephone at first. Although he wanted to keep
to certain songs. It makes me laugh. After his       working, Tran took the call. He kept it short.”).
song is over, I give him a treat.”)
                                                                                                                                                         5
            Alignment with GLEs
                 Across the Curriculum

Reading
2.2.1 Explain ideas or events in sequential order. (4th)
2.2.3 Explain the influence of setting on character, and plot
   (5th)
2.4.2 Explain how author’s use of word choice, sentence
   structure and length, and/or literary devices contributes
   to imagery, suggests a mood, or otherwise influences an
   audience. (6th)




                                                            6
                 Alignment with GLEs
                       Across the Curriculum

Math                                  Science
1.1.5 Explain the meaning of          3.1.3 Describe how to change a
   addition and subtraction of like      system to solve a problem or
   denominator fractions. (4th)          improve a solution to a
1.1.8 Demonstrate or explain             problem. (3rd, 4th, 5th)
   various strategies used during     3.1.3 Compare the effectiveness
   estimation. (5th)                     of different solutions to a
1.2.1 Describe and compare the           problem or challenge based on
   use of area and volume (e.g.,         criteria, using scientific
   covering and filling). (6th)          concepts and principles (6th,
                                          7th, 8th)
                                      3.1.3 Describe how to change a
                                         system to solve a problem or
                                         improve a solution to a
                                         problem. (6th, 7th, 8th)

                                                                     7
Connecting Data to Instruction




                                 8
                  Link to the WASL
• The quality of elaboration is directly related to
  scores on the Content, Organization, and
  Style portion of the WASL. The best writing
  has multiple layers of relevant elaboration.
• Thoughtful elaboration is guided by the needs
  of the audience. Top scoring WASL papers
  show clear audience awareness.
• Relevant elaboration plays a strong role in
  effective organization; in clear writing, ideas
  drive the writing—not form.
•   Source: WASL scoring team, OSPI Standards Review Committee report




                                                                        9
             Notes - Writing WASL
• Revised WASL Mode-Specific Writing Checklists
  • All 3 & 4 teachers – Narrative and Expository
  • All 5 & 6 teachers – Expository and Persuasive
  • Put them up in classroom & discuss the meaning
    of the items on the checklists with their students.
  • Reinforce the writing expectations throughout their
    writing instruction
  • Save the posters from year to year

• Leave Writing Checklist Wall Posters Up During
  WASL Testing
                                                   10
   OSPI Observations - WASL Writing Essentials

• Prewrite to
  •   Find topic
  •   Narrow topic
  •   Brainstorm for details and support
  •   Organize
• Write, mindful of audience & purpose
  • Elaborate
  • Choose specific language
  • Vary sentence structure


OSPI Packet – Elaboration: Showing Training
                                               11
      12 Writing Essentials for Al Grade Levels
                   Regie Routman
                  Writing Essentials

 Write for a specific reader and a meaningful purpose

 Determine an appropriate topic
   • Narrow the topic
   • Decide on what is most important to include

 Present ideas clearly, with a logical well-organized flow

 Elaborate on ideas

 Embrace language


                                                              12
   Regie Routman’s 12 Essentials for Writing
                          continued:


 Create engaging leads
 Compose satisfying endings
 Craft authentic voice
 Reread, rethink, and revise while composing
 Apply correct conventions and form
 Read widely and deeply
 Take responsibility for producing effective writing


                                                        13
           Why elaboration?
For the reader!!! Keep your audience in
 mind.
To do away with dull, drap language that
 is about as interesting to read as a city
 phone book.
To bring energy, juice to writing; to make
 the writing come alive.
     Elaboration is missing on papers scoring “2” on
      WASL. Elaboration critical writing strategy.
                                                        14
     Definition of Elaboration
Elaboration means. . .
  – To work out in detail
  – To support idea with details



  Simply put –
  Tell the reader more


                                   15
                       Trip to Thailand

 The sun came up, and it was a cool day.
The sunset was colorful, and I watched the
Thai women walk to work in the fields.



Written by D. Carter




                                             16
                Dream of a Thousand Lives
                            A Sojourn in Thailand

           The morning opens cool and clouded,
       giving me a sky of ash rose, scarlet, then clear
       gold shafting down into the hills. With practice,
       I see more every day. Seeing grace is easy
       here because the people are born into it. Even
       women walking to work in the fields move with
       the clean-curved backs of
      dancers.


Written by Karen Connelly                                  17
        Elaboration means..
• Tell the reader more…
  – By adding sentences with more explanation
    using a variety of specific strategies, e.g.,
    details, examples, definitions, descriptions,
    dialogue, quotations, statistics, and facts
  – By adding explanation within sentences, e.g.,
    appositives, phrases, and clauses



                                                18
      Which Strategies First?
• Focus for March 9
  details, examples, definitions, descriptions,
   anecdotes, prepositional phrases
• Focus for March 30
  dialogue, quotations, statistics and facts
  Appositives and clauses




                                                   19
         What about Six Trait Writing?
• Ideas – All about information
  – Clarity and detail
• Organization – Herding Cats
  – How to begin, where to go next, how to end
• Voice – Finding the Golden Thread
  – A desire to reach out to the reader through language
• Word Choice – Playing with Language
  – Right word for clear message; words paint picture
• Sentence Fluency – Listening to the Page
  – Carefully constructed language enhances meaning
• Conventions - Mindful of your Table Manners
  – Spelling, punctuation, grammar and usage, paragraphing
    and capitalization                                  20
Another way to slice the Onion




                                 21
Six Trait Writing and Elaboration

• Ideas
  – Discovering best details; elaborating on idea
• Voice
  – Speaking directly to the reader; audience
• Word choice
  – Exact language, powerful words and phrases
• Sentence Fluency
  – Enhancing meaning, elaboration with
    prepositional phrases, clauses, appositives
                                                    22
To Elaborate add one or more of
        the following…
Details
Examples
Definitions
Descriptions
Anecdotes
Prepositional phrases            23
  What does elaboration look like?

• Details, Details, Details

• Pick Details that create vivid pictures for
  the reader . Try for Details that will stick
  in the reader’s mind. Here’s a description
  of a new baby:

  For the first year she didn’t have
  any hair at all, and we taped a pink
  bow to the top of her head.                    24
What does elaboration look like?
 Elaboration – in the Details.
• Use details to make complex ideas
  understandable.


• Big ideas like crime, safety, dangers of
  big city living are dramatized in a few
  well-chosen details – Consider Carol
  Fenner’s writing in Yolanda’s Genius.
                                             25
            Yolanda’s Genius
         written by Carol Fenner
• Yolanda’s mother is tired of crime and
  perils of living in urban Chicago.


    She [Yolanda’s mother] was
 always talking about growing flowers
 and owning a barbecue grill they
 wouldn’t have to chain to the house.
                                           26
   Elaboration – in the Details
• Select details that make your writing
  sound authentic.




                                          27
An excerpt from a story about car racing, written by Micah
           Botelho, a sixth grader in Honolulu:

      I’m running against Hawaiian Thunder, one
 of the fastest cars on the track. My pitman gives
 me the signal; he drops his hand. I slam my foot
 hard on the gas pedal. All my gizmos and
 gadgets are going. My slicks (tires) spin,
 burning like rubber. All of a sudden it’s over. I
 finish the stage. I pull up to the start line, my
 foot hard on the brake, and wait for the light,
 feeling eager because once the light hits green
 I’M BAD!
       All of a sudden, BOOM!, it’s green. I pound
 the gas. I glance at Thunder’s car just one
 fender in front of me. I accelerate, fuel burning,
 speedometer crazy, rpms blasting, everything
 flying.                                            28
     The Watsons go to Birmingham – 1963
   by Christopher Curtis, is a novel full of odd,
               wonderful details:

    The only problem with having two pairs of
gloves was that if you lost one you had to wear
the next pair kindergarten-style. That meant
Momma would run a string through the sleeves
of your coat and tie two safety pins on the ends
of the string, then she’d pin your gloves to the
string and it was impossible to lose the gloves
because every time you took them off they’d just
hang from your coat.

                                                    29
              Give it a try!

   It rained last night. The wind blew.
 The dog barked. The lights flickered. It
 was a stormy night.

• Revise the paragraph with 5 or 6 details.

• Share your revised paragraph with your
  partner.
                                              30
                        Responses
                           and
                         Revision




Drafting                                          Editing




                                    Formatting
                                       and
           Prewriting               Publication




                                                            31
    What does elaboration look like?
           Give Examples!!!
 • Phrases that add information through the
   following: EXAMPLES - provide more
   specific information about something. This
   sounds like. . .
                               My brothers always
The cats were all
                               seem to pick on me.
acting like they were
                               For instance, they may
crazy. For example,
                               hide my soccer shoes,
one jumped at me with
                               not answer the phone.
all …



                                                   32
Develop your point with an example.

     The game of golf can be
played for an entire lifetime and
also by yourself. People of any
age can go out and play a round
of golf whenever they want as
opposed to team sports. For
example, football, soccer, and
volleyball take an entire team of
people to play. How many times
are you going to call up ten or
more of your friends and go play
sports?
                                      33
      EXAMPLES - your turn
• Examples are an effective way to help the
  reader understand what you are talking
  about.

• Tell your partner about a characteristic of
  your best friend. Then give an example.



                                                34
   What does elaboration look like?
   Tell your reader what you mean…
 • Phrases that add information and details
   through the following: DEFINITION - a way
   to restate an unfamiliar word or tell what it
   means
The best part of our hot lunch program is the Ala
Carte. What I mean by Ala Carte is the little deli line
past the lunch line where you can buy cookies,
slushies, and candy bars.




                                                          35
Develop your point with a definition.
   One of the best programs that
 our school has is something
 called Brainworks. Brainworks
 is an after-school program
 where kids go and do their
 homework. They even let you
 work on the computers there. I
 like it a lot because the lady
 who runs the program keeps
 everyone pretty quiet. At my
 house, I have 6 little brothers
 and sisters and there is never a
 quiet place to work.
                                    36
                  DEFINITION – your turn
• Defining specific words shows an awareness of the
  audience. It shows you are thinking of what the audience
  knows and what they don’t know.

• Imagine telling your students about the best part of your
  summer vacation.



“The best part of my summer vacation
  is_____________. What I mean by ________ is
  ______________________.
• Practice what you might say to your students with
  your partner. (How might what you tell and the definition change if you
  are sharing this information with an adult?)                      37
   What does elaboration look like?
• Phrases that add information and details
  through the following: DESCRIPTION - a
  way to create vivid images for the reader
The sound of my phone cut through the silent class and
 I anxiously dug into my backpack to grab it before Mrs.
Schuman, the writing teacher, noticed. Pawing through
Chapstick and lipstick, gum wrappers and rubber hair wraps,
my hand darted around the deep pockets of my backpack.
“Must shut off ringer,” I thought.




                                                              38
Develop your point with description.
                     Student Sample



Jackie walked slowly to
  the Vietnam Veterans’
  Memorial exhibit. In her
  hand were two yellow
  daffodils that she had
  brought with her on the
  hour long bus ride.
  Their green stems,
  snapped from the
  patch in the backyard,
  were slowly drying out.
                                      39
   DESCRIPTION – your turn
• Description can take many forms and still
  be effective. Show, not just tell your
  reader. Be specific with your word choice.
  Try to create an image that appeals to
  your reader’s senses.

• Work with your partner and write a
short paragraph that describes the
student’s bathroom at your school.
                                           40
   What does elaboration look like?
• Phrases that add information and details
  through the following: ANECDOTE- an
  anecdote is a small piece of a story
  inserted into an essay that helps make the
  point. This sounds like. . .
                                Hey, I remember the time
Once when I was in elementary
                                when I had to carry my . . .
   school, the kids would
         always. . .




                                                       41
  Develop your point with an anecdote.
                        Student sample

You can’t give up, Jack. I
remember one time when I
played on the Little League
baseball team. We were losing,
and it was the 8th inning.
Everyone was getting
discouraged, and then the coach
said, “BOYS! You’ve got to
RALLY here! Turn your ball caps
around and GET OUT THERE!”
So, Jack, turn your ball cap – I
mean your ATTITUDE -- around
and get out there!
                                         42
               ANECDOTES
This is an effective way to make or develop a point.



• Do you remember any teacher who told lots of
  stories as they were teaching?
• Or grandparents who told stories about “when
  they were young”?

• Think of an anecdote…what “point”
might it develop. Share this anecdote
with your partner.                                43
SHOW, DON’T TELL




                   44
           Show, don’t tell.
• What is the difference between these two
  sentences?

• A. The room was a mess.

• B. Rumpled bedspread, piled up clothes,
  and jumbled dresser greeted me as I
  pushed my way into the room.

                                             45
    Definition of Telling and Showing
• Telling is the use of broad
  generalizations.

• Showing is the use of details,
  facts, statistics, examples,
  anecdotes, quotations, dialogue
  – elaboration–
  to develop, persuade, explain or
  to enliven a story.
                                        46
        Show with Description
• White shirts are   • White shirts are hard
  dumb.                to clean, show pizza
                       stains, and make you
                       look like a waiter in a
                       cheesy restaurant.




                                             47
                   Telling vs. Showing 1

 Although there are many places that smell bad, there are
    many fascinating things to see at the Farmer's Market.
Rows of tangerines, crisp red apples, long
purple eggplants, and succulent
strawberries invite the shopper to stop at
every farmer’s stand. Many of the farmers
in the Farmer's Market have sold their
home grown vegetables and fruits since
the early 1900’s, when the market was the
only place to buy fresh food in the city.
Now the market has expanded to include
bakeries, funky antique stores, and a
comic book vendor. The market is a visual
feast for tourists and a keepsake for our
town.                                                    48
                       Telling vs. Showing 2
     The Beatles started a new trend in music in the
       mid-sixties.
• For many Americans the evening of February 9,
   1964 was a turning point in musical history. On
   this evening the Beatles made their debut in
   America on the Ed Sullivan television show.
   Kathi Anderson, then sixteen in Chicago,
   remembers, “My friends and I sat shaking and
   hugging each other on the couch in my living
   room as the Fab Four bounced out onto the
   stage. Their shaggy hair shook as they sang
  ‘I want to hold your hand’ and ‘She loves you’
   with an energy and sound we’d never heard
   before. We were instantly and forever in love.”
   That night British Invasion, as it was called,      49
   began.
          Some Dull Sentences

With a partner, discuss how to make these
 sentences show, rather than tell.

        The man in the car was angry.
        I was tired last night.
        The pizza was delicious.
        The car was filthy.

  Pick two and rewrite them
  on your own.


                                            50
 Additional Showing Examples


Although it smelled horrible, the apothecary
  shop was fascinating.




                                               51
    Showing
     Then they visited the apothecary, which was
   fascinating enough to make up for the horrible
   smell, a mixture of bad eggs and rotten
   cabbages. Barrels of slimy stuff stood on the
   floor; jars of herbs, dried roots, and bright
   powders lined the walls; bundles of feathers,
   strings of fangs, and snarled claws hung from
   the ceiling… Harry himself examined silver
   unicorn horns at twenty-one Galleons
   each and miniscule glittery-black
   beetle eyes (five knuts a scoop).
                                                                                 52
J. K. Rowlings, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone (NYC, Scholastic Inc.,1997)p.81.
Telling – In the 1930’s the dust storms were horrible

Showing –
   Every morning the house had to be cleaned.
Everett Buckland of Waynocka said, “If you didn’t
sweep the dust out right quick between the storms,
you’d end up scooping it out with a shovel.” And every
morning someone had to go check the animals.
   The fierce gales buried chickens, pigs, dogs, cats
and occasionally cattle. Children were assigned the
task of cleaning the nostrils of cows two or three times
a day.


Jerry Stanley, Children of the Dust Bowl ( New York, Crown Publishers Inc.,1992), p. 7.   53
ASKING QUESTIONS
THAT LEAD TO
ELABORATION




                   54
 Elaboration answers questions for
            the reader.
        What
     problems?




Kids have problems.




                                 55
 Elaboration answers questions for
            the reader.

• Kids have problems. For example, kids
  don’t always have enough money to buy
  what they want.

                       Hmmm . . .what do kids
                          want to buy?




                                                56
 Elaboration answers questions for
            the reader.
• Kids have problems. For example, 80% of
  kids don’t always have enough money to
  buy CD’s, food for after school, and the
  kind of clothes they want, according to
  Kids Today.


                       Oh…now I understand. Kids want
                       money for CDs, food, and clothes.

                                                     57
 Elaboration answers questions for
            the reader.

Think about who will read your
paper. What information will
help them understand you more clearly?

Turn to your partner and add even more
 elaboration. Discuss what kind of CDs,
 food, and clothes kids may want to buy.
                                           58
 Elaboration answers questions for
            the reader.
Perhaps your samples sounded like this.

      Kids have problems. For example,
  80% of kids don’t always have enough
  money to buy CD’s, like the new CD
  from Black Eyed Peas, snack and junk
  food for after school, and the kind of
  clothes they want like jeans from The
  Gap, according to Kids Today.

                                           59
   Elaborate with Prepositional Phrases
• Prepositional phrases are often used to show
  position, place, location, or time.
   examples of prepositions: by, of, for, on, in, under, with,
    through, beside, before, after, during


• A prepositional phrase adds
  information and elaboration by
  answering questions a reader
• may have.

• A prepositional phrase is a group of words
  that add elaboration to complete sentences.60
       Phrases add elaboration.
Example

• Susie, a sixth grader at CPE, sings in the Girls’
  Choir.
                         When does Susie sing
                          in the Girls’ Choir?
                         Where does she sing
                                 in it?

• Susie, a sixth grader at CPE, sings in the Girls’
  Choir on Tuesdays after school from 4 – 6 PM at
  the Civic Center auditorium.
                                      WHY?            61
 Your Turn to Add Prepositional
            Phrases
• With your partner, add prepositional
  phrases to the following sentences to
  answer questions a reader may have.

• Larry got a new computer game.
• Maryann earned an academic award.
• Nadia came in first place.

                                          62
   SPECIFIC, CONCRETE
DETAILS vs. GENERAL
LANGUAGE




                        63
Rocks Are Not as Strong as
      CONCRETE



  CONCRETE details are the
specific, exact names of things.
 Using CONCRETE details will make your paper
 stronger, just like CONCRETE makes a building
     stronger. Concrete details are SPECIFIC.


                                                 64
            General vs. Specific
School lunches
are (good) (bad).
                      Rewrite the sentence on the
                        left. Use specific and
Choose either side.      interesting language.
                            See student samples:
                            10 High School Lunch
                            7 Middle School Lunch




                                                    65
               Be specific
• Your word choices do not have to be
  – Big words
  – Fancy words
  – Words from a thesaurus


• Remember, to be powerful and effectively
  elaborate, you just need to be SPECIFIC.
• Use concrete, specific details.
                                             66
             Work with a partner
• Find the specific, concrete details in the
  following paragraphs. Highlight these
  words.



Student sample: Locker




                                               67
                              Your Turn
Add specific, concrete details to make
the following paragraph effective.

– Besides helping to forget the problems life throws at us for
    awhile, acting is a fun learning experience. You get to pose
    as characters much different from yourself and for a short
    period of time, get to walk in someone else’s shoes. You
    can be famous or live in a foreign country. With acting you
    can be whatever you like.

–   See student sample: 10 Drama with annotations   See: Elaboration Scoring Guide




                                                                                     68
  CRITERIA FOR
ASSESSMENT




                 69
 Scoring Guide for Elaboration
• Teachers and students should use the
  Elaboration Scoring Guide to evaluate
  students’ writing for elaboration.

              See: Elaboration Scoring Guide




                                               70
     Checklist for Elaboration
• Teachers and students should read the
  checklist and may use it as an alternative
  tool to evaluate writing.

     •              See: Elaboration Checklist




                                                 71
   After Reading the Checklist
• If any bullet has a NO marked in your
  writing, this is the time

  – To revise and add more and/or different types
    of elaboration
  – To consider carefully why you chose to leave
    something out



                                                72
           BIBLIOGRAPHY FOR
              ELABORATION
• Coomber, James. “Elaboration in Vocabulary Learning:
  A Comparison of Three Rehearsal Methods.” Research
  in the Teaching of English, v20 n3 (1986): p281-93.
• Gamble, Sandra., Hashway, Robert. “A Network of
  Writing Skills.” Reading Improvement, v27 n1 (1990):
  p10-13.
• McAlexander, Patricia J.. “Ideas in Practice: Audience
  Awareness and Developmental Composition.”.Journal of
  Developmental Education, v20 n1 (1996): p28-30,32-33.
• Tierney, Robert J.. “Writing and Reading Working
  Together. Occasional Paper No. 5.” Center for the Study
  of Writing, Berkeley, CA.; Center for the Study of Writing,
  Pittsburgh, PA., 1988.

                                                           73
  These materials were modified for the
   intermediate level from OSPI Writing
      Instructional Support Materials
developed by the Core Development Team
       Nikki Elliott-Schuman – OSPI, Project Director
       Charlotte Carr – Retired Seattle SD, Facilitator
              Barbara Ballard – Coupeville SD
                  Anne Beitlers – Seattle SD
                Marcie Belgard – Richland SD
              Betsy Cornell – Moses Lake SD
                  Lydia Fesler – Spokane SD
                  Lori Hadley – Puyallup SD
       Lissa Humphreys – East Valley SD (Spokane)
          Kathleen McGuinness – Kennewick SD
          Lisa McKeen – East Valley SD (Yakima)
             Sharon Schilperoort – Yakima SD
                                                          74
        Holly Stein – Eastside Catholic High School

				
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