“Righty ho by leader6


									“Righty ho...” says Dave, after helping you with a few remaining questions about your audio
choices...”Want another coffee?...” you accept – this time, Dave makes your coffee – he knows that
you’re keen to spend some money – so he’s happy to spend the time. Besides, it gives you longer to try
(unsuccessfully) to switch on some of the demo gear.

“Onto lighting then...” says Dave, handing you your coffee (and a chocolate digestive this time – talk
about pushing the boat out) “Basically as you’ll be a mobile DJ you’ll mainly be lookin’ at yer floor
standing lighting – we’ve got several types and its all about –channels- some lighting controllers are 3
channel, so they’ll run three circuits of bulbs, other controllers are 4 channel...”

                                               “Here are some Pulsar 3 channel spot boxes, which
                                               clamp together for easy transit, with the a nice basic
                                               sound-to-light 2250 controller and leads safely stored in
                                               the middle. The controller just listens to the music that
                                               yer playing, makes channel 1 flash when there’s bass,
                                                             makes channel 2 flash when there’s
                                                             midrange, you know, middle frequencies
                                                             playing, and it flashes channel 3 when
                                                             theres some top-end, high notes playing.
                                                             Yer just plug it it to the wall socket, and
                                                             run a read from your speakers or amp into
                                                             it, and leave it running all night – easy!”

“’Course, if yer
after something
that’s still 3
channel, but with a
bit more flexibility
and control to it,
then Pulsar also do
the same neat an’
tidy package, but
with an even better controller. – its
this one ‘ere”

“And over ‘ere” Continues Dave, “We’ve got the same compact idea, only its in 4 channel, this time”.
Daves watching you and finally decides that you’re about to ask his favourite question. He waits...you
wait, he waits, you ask...” If they’re 4 channel, how come they’ve got .....”, Daves verbal premature
                                           exclamation (!) cant hold back any longer “How come they’ve
                                                               got more than 4 bulbs Sir?”, you nod.
                                                               “They’ve got the capacity to drive more
                                                               than one bulb per channel – upto about
                                                               750watts worth per channel – so about 7 x
                                                               100watt light bulbs per channel – if you
                                                               wanted to.”

                                                                                  “So, have you got any
                                                                                    5 channel lights
                                                                                   then?” you ask, keen
                                                                                   to put some distance
                                                                                  between you and your
                                                                                 passes – you’re waiting
                                                                                 for the piece of
                                                                                tumbleweed bush to
                                                                                roll past.
Finally Dave lets you off the hook “You’d think, wouldn’t you. “ he smiles, “But there is this 10
                                                                        channel controller over here –
                                                                             but you’d need to make
                                                                                  your own lights
                                                                                  boxes or screens up,
                                                                                  as nearly all the
                                                                                  lighting around is
                                                                                  either 3 or 4

“Talkin’ of screens, how about this one for a
centrepiece at the front of your show?” He
gestures for you to turn around in the slightly
confined space and points down, as he flicks a
switch... You hear a “woooo!” escape your lips,
but you feel its justified.

“Theres no less than 60 x 15watt coloured pygmy
bulbs in there” says Dave, “That’s over 900 watts
of light, in the one box – at your command – runs
off of a 4 channel controller, and comes with its
own front cover so you don’t break the bulbs in

“That’s niiiiice” you ooze “although it gives me
some ideas for making up my own light screens
too, with different designs. Can I buy like a really
good controller, you know, with the money that
I’ve saved by doing the lights myself, and then add
lights later?”

“Sure can!” says Dave, “take a look over here” he
continues, taking a couple of half steps over to some metal
things, sitting on top of some wooden things.

“Firstly then, we’ve got the Pulsar 2250 which we saw earlier, built into the 2 times 6 way spot boxes –
here it is –in the nude- as it were...really easy it is...no controls, just plug it in to mains, plug it into
speakers and stick the Bulgin in”

                                                            “The what?”

                                                            “The Bulgin...”

                                                            “Whats a Bulgin?”

                                                           “Ah, sorry” apologises Dave “sorry, bit of
                                                           jargon there – the Bulgin is this special multi-
                                                           way plug up in the top left corner of the
                                                           controller, its got 8 pins”

                                                           “Ah ok, is it fairly easy to wire up?”

                                                           “Yeaaaaaah....” Dave drags it out a bit “but it
                                                           can sometimes get a bit tight trying to fit all the
                                                           wires in, but easy once you get the ‘ang of it”.
“’Ang on a minute” says Dave, disappearing out of sight
behind his desk momentarily “Aha! Heres one of our
advice sheets – all about the wiring inside a Bulgin plug,
both for 3 or 4 Channel usage.

“Hmmmm, OK, got any controllers without Bulging

“One or two definitely” Says Dave, showing you to larger Pulsar controller.

“This ones still Pulsar” he says, reading
the same wording on the controller that
you can read “but as well as the Bulgin
connector, its got 3 ordinary 3 pin plug
sockets on it, so you can just plug ordinary
3 pin plugs into it. The three switches
allow you to keep the sockets switched on
manually, instead of sound-to-light an’ then
you can also use the Bulgin socket at the same
time, if yer wanted to add more spot boxes or light
screens onto it for bigger shows.”

You’re nodding and smiling but Daves sixth sense (making up for his other 5 perhaps) kicks in and
senses that you’re still not 100% happy about the Bulgin socket saga.

“Tell yer what I’ll do” he says “I’ll show you me wiring up a Bulgin a bit later, and if its still seeming
complicated then, I’ll do any Bulgin wiring that’s necessary to get you up and running with whatever
you buy at the same time.

“Deal” you say – pleased that he was nice enough to phrase things the way he did. “What next?”

                                                             “Well now that we’ve got the Bulgin thing
                                                               sorted out, theres this little controller
                                                                  which you might be interested in – it’s
                                                                     a simple sound-to-light, 3 channel
                                                                         controller, but it does allow you
                                                                          to fine-tune the response to
                                                                          each of yer three frequencies;
                                                                          Bass, middle and Treble – so if
                                                                         you’re playing some music that
                                                                        ‘asnt got a lot of treble to it, you
                                                                        can turn the treble control up a bit
                                                                       to compensate for that and still get
                                                                      yer three channels flashing away.”

You’re impressed – not so much by the controller, but at the length of Daves last sentence...”Ohh those
look good” you enthuse, stepping toward what looks a little like a traffic light which has fallen over.

 “Ah yeah, those are 3 channel spot banks” Dave informs you. “and
theres a 4 channel version available too, to special
order, takes about a week ; they’re really popular
and metal cased too, so, I reckon we’ll be seeing
those around for a good few years yet yer know.”
(oh yes Dave, we know...). Also the flat metal
stand bit, swivels up to protect the bulbs while
you’re carting it around to and from gigs. Neat!”.
“OK, well before I show you the rather tasty overhead lighting, take a little wander over here” – he’s
right, it is a little wander – about 3 steps, however, as you look lustfully over toward the promised
overhead lighting treats, you trip, almost falling.

                                                               “What on Earth are those?” you ask as
                                                               Dave tries to work out which direction
                                                                your half empty coffee mug went when
                                                                you tripped. “What? Those white round
                                                                 things?”, “Yeah those”.

                                                                      “Ah, those are Dry Ice Kettles – you
                                                                       know the sorta low lying fog effect
                                                                        that you see on Top of The Pops
                                                                         when Pans People are dancing
                                                                          around knee deep in the fog?
                                                                          Yeah? Well, they use 3 of the
                                                                    Maxi ones. You half fill ‘em up with
                                                                    water, let it boil, and when you’re ready
                                                                    for the low fog effect, you lower a
                                                                     lump of dry-ice into the boiling water,
                                                                     by pushing down the black handle on
the top there, just like one of those fancy coffee pots - it reacts with the boiling water and hey presto! “.

“hmmm sounds interesting” you say “It’ll work for mobile discos will it?”

 “Weeeeeeeeeeeellll – sort of” struggles Dave
“The kettle will definitely work – no problems
there at all, but the dry ice like evaporates really
quickly once you get it delivered – even it you
try an’ keep it in a coolbox – you could get a
lump delivered at 5pm and it’d be gone by the
time your 8pm gig started – never mind – take a
look at this. It’s called a fuzz light for obvious
reasons, an’ we do’em in Red, Blue, Yella, and
Green – we’ve got one here look, set up next to
one of the Police sirens that I showed you
earlier. They look really good in 2’s or 4’s

“Hmm, I’m not so sure about those...What about the overhead lighting?”

“Aha, a man after my own
heart” says Dave, a brief meeting of
stern eyes makes him wish he’d re-
phrased that a bit.

 “Take a looky here...” says Dave,
holding your shoulders and giving
you a little twist into the right

“Starting on the right then,
you’ve got two strobes –
they will work on their
own, but we also do a
great strobe controller
which you can control
several strobes from
really conveniently
from, down at ground
“Oh, is this the Strobe controller? - this thing with “Strobes” written across it?

“Yeah, that’s the one” confirms Dave “really nice
bit’o’kit – look you can even run it sound-to-light
lighting on it too – saves carrying two controllers.

“That’s pretty compact already” you say. “Ok
then, what’s that item on the right, hanging on the
smaller stand – it doesn’t seem to have a bulb

“Quite right, and well spotted – it’s a bubble

“A what?”

“It’s a machine that blows bubbles?”

                                             “Oh, ok, hhhhmmmm what sort of lights would I need to
                                            point at that mirrorball on the left, if I went for one of

                                            “Either, one, or two of these beauties” says Dave

                                           “oh, I see, just four lightbulbs to at the mirrorball?”

                                           “Nearly...theres only 1 lightbulb, and that’s the one right at
                                          the top of the unit. This whole round front bit slowly revolves
                                          around, moving a different coloured filter in front of the bulb
                                          as it goes. “

                                           “Oh, OK, pretty good then”

                            “Definitely, you wouldn’t have got this sort of thing 2 or 3 years ago, just the
normal lop-            sided motor colour changers that fitted on the side of a pinspot bulb. This ones
much more stylish to look at. Also, just like the metal 3 way spot banks we saw a few feet over there,
the metal bracket acts as a lens cover in transit too.

“Oh, and while we’re looking at mirror balls, literally” Dave adds with a chuckle, “literally looking...he
hee..., don’t forget that you’ll need a mirror ball rotator for ‘em – to make it go ‘round – we sell 10rpm,
5rpm, 2rpm, 1rpm and even a half rpm – we also stock a variable speed rotator from Le maitré –
they’re quite well known. Basically, we recommend that the bigger the venue, the slower the rotation
of the mirror ball.”

“OK, I’ll bare that in mind” you say. “What are those things hanging on the overhead pole, inbetween
the mirrorball and the strobe?” without looking around at the display (lets face it, even Dave could
remember what was up there, there wasn’t a lot to choose from back in the early 70’s – we’ve got John
Travolta and Night Fever to thank for the whole scene becoming “trendy”). “Those are Projectors”
says Dave.

“Oh right, yeah, I saw a DJ using projectors the other week to show, slides of the venue and its
customers from the previous weeks”.
“Ahh.” Daves looking a little perplexed – but recovers. “Ahh yes, those would have been Slide
projectors that you saw. We do sell slide projectors , like these two over here. Firstly, on the left,
                             we’ve got our own brand one, which takes
                                          single slides easily but needs
                                             you to change the slide
                                              manually, or we’ve
                                                also got this lovely
                                                Kodak automatic
                                               projector with a
                                              slide carousel,
                                          which changes the
                                    slide whenever you press a button on
                                    its wired remote control, or every so many
                                    seconds automatically, which is adjustable by the DJ.

“Now you see Those projectors back up there on the overhead rig are proper disco projectors, rather
than just slide projectors – they’re brighter, and whilst they don’t easily accept photo slides, the best
one up their has got literally hundreds of accessories for it, allowing you to do almost anything that
you, or yer audience could possibly imagine.”

Daves impressed you again, that’s 58 words all strung together...

“So, erm, which ones the –best one- up there? You mentioned theres a best one?”

“Oh yes” smiles Dave “This one definitely – it’s the Optikinetics Solar 250, in this lovely silver colour
– most definitely the long-term future of professional disco lighting – you mark my words. We’ll still
be selling these in ooohhh the year 2000, easy!” (He was sort of right, the Solar 250 is still being sold,
but now in white, and mainly for retail environment – alas Dave isn’t right in saying that it’ll be him
still selling them though...)

”Even better is this – we’ve got our own brand version of the Optikinetics here - now notice straight
away, there are two small round power sockets on the side of the projector. Those are for plugging
bolt-on accessories into – and wow! Are there a lot of accessories to bolt onto it.

“Oh really? Like what?”

“Well, instantly, you can choose a picture, or effects wheel from a range of over 50 to choose from –
like these”
“Or you can plug in an cassette rotator, which automatically changes which effect cassette is displayed,
every so many minutes. Heres one, you load it with 4 cassettes and just leave it running – you
don’t have to climb up on a chair and start swapping cassettes mid-way through the
night – this is really the way forward with disco lighting.

                                      Already, overhead light shows are pretty
                                      much gauged by ‘ow many projectors
                                       you got. – they even do whole cases of
                                               effects which go together to
                                                make some great patterns on
                                                     your walls, dancefloors etc.
                                                     Like this Dynagraph set over on the left.        –
                                                     ten wheels, two different rotators – ‘undreds of
                                                    pattern combinations.”

“OK,                                          so whichever pattern cassette or picture wheel I choose to
put in at                                 the beginning of the night, or the end of the night, or in the
auto-changer                          thingy, just projects straight out forwards onto a wall or floor, or
ceiling then, yes?

Daves been nodding enthusiastically for the last 10
seconds and he doesn’t seem to be able to stop now
either...”Yes! But, you can make the same pattern
move around the room and appear in different
places at the same time if you want to.”

“Ah that’s sounds like a better idea. How do I do

“Well we’ve got a selection of these clever devices
to choose from – The 2 way, 4 way, and 6 way
prism revolvers are motorised and turn really
slowly, putting 2, 4, 6 identical images of whatever
you’re projecting, all around the room.

“That’s Neat”

“That’s not all – theres also a Laser Tracer kits,
which turns any normal projection wheel, or
cassette into 3 small, bright, well defined dots of
dancing light – a bit like a laser beam.”

                                                           “...and even...and this is one of my favourites”
                                                           whispers Dave conspiratorially “The Catherine
                                                           Wheel – its really high speed and its got a
                                                           clutch which engages and dis-engages while
                                                           the units spinning to make a Catherine Wheel
                                                           image – excellent add-on for any disco.
“Cor!” you smile “That’s gooood, What will they
think of next?”

“The Splodoscope” announces Dave...

“The What-a-soap?”

“No, Splodascope” corrects Dave. “It’s one of those
rare products where liquids and ‘lectricity, really do
mix quite well. The Splodascope fits to the Solar 250
projector, and has coloured liquids in a little reservoir,
which are then electrically pumped into the see-thru
tank which is in the path of the projection. All the
colours pulse around with the beat of the music. –
They do a top-up kit too, with more colour liquids and
a syringe for injecting the ingredients into the scope”.

Dave flicks a switch and the dangling Optikinetics
Solar 250 projector, kicks into life, with instantly produced blobs of colour dancing around on the
opposite wall. Only the sound of the phone ringing, and Dave tripping over the Dry Ice kettles to get to
it, breaks the hypnotic state that you and Dave reach. As Dave talks on the phone, you scribble down
some more notes and do a bit of tapping away on the Texas Instruments LED pocket calculator – its red
numbers glowing back at you from its black display. You sense that you’re nearly at the stage where
you want to talk discounts and final sums to Dave – Dave senses it too, even though he’s still talking
on the phone – he gestures you enthusiastically toward the kettle again.

A couple of
later, and
Dave, still
on the
phone is
gesturing at
you again –
you (and
toward a
small pile
of paper
which has
been fanned
out neatly
on top of a
you pick
one up and

An hour or so later, after plenty of hands-
on, face-to-face discussion, demonstrating
and discount negotiating, you drive away
from the Disco centre, with a promise of a
call in 28 days or sooner when Daves
offered to show you how all the gear fits
together. Your wallet lighter, and your new
car sticker proudly displayed in your
Cortina’s back window. See you in five years or so...about 1980 ish...?

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