Roadkill

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					Any violence in our humour?
                       Roadkill




Any violence in our humour?

             ?
• Why did the chicken cross the road?
Why did the chicken cross the
           road?

PLATO: For the greater good.
Why did the chicken cross the
           road?

ARISTOTLE: It is in the nature of
chickens to cross roads.
Why did the chicken cross the
           road?

MARX: It was a historical necessity.
Why did the chicken cross the
           road?

            TIMOTHY LEARY:
            Because that’s the only trip
            the establishment would let
            it take.
                 Any violence in our humour?
Why did the chicken cross the
           road?

SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an
unprovoked attack…and we were quite
justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve
gas on it.
             Any violence in our humour?
Why did the chicken cross the
           road?

       RONALD REAGAN: I forget.
        *     * *** *

CAPT. JAMES T. KIRK:
To boldly go where no chicken has
gone before.
                 Any violence in our humour?
Why did the chicken cross the
           road?

MARTIN LUTHER KING: I
envision a world where all chickens
will be free to cross roads without
having their motives called into
question.
   Why did the chicken cross the
              road?
FOX MULDER: You saw it cross the
road with your own eyes. How many
more chickens have to cross the road
before you believe it.
                 Any violence in our humour?
Why did the chicken cross the
           road?

RICHARD M. NIXON: The chicken
did not cross the road. I repeat, the
chicken did not cross the road.
                  Any violence in our humour?
Why did the chicken cross the
           road?

MACHIAVELLI: The point is that
the chicken crossed the road. Who
cares why? The end of crossing the
road justifies whatever motive there
was.
                 Any violence in our humour?

  At the “Road Kill Café”

JERRY SEINFELD: Why does
anyone cross the road?
I mean, doesn’t anyone ever think to
ask, “What the heck was the chicken
doing wandering around all over the
place anyway?”
Why did the chicken cross the
           road?

FREUD: The fact that you are at all
concerned that the chicken crossed the
road shows your underlying sexual
insecurity.
Why did the chicken cross the
           road?

BILL GATES: I have just released the
new Chicken Office 2000 which will
not only cross roads, but will lay eggs,
eliminate the DOS Shell, file your
important documents, and balance your
chickbooks.
  Why did the chicken cross the
             road?
OLIVER STONE: The question is
not, “Why did the chicken cross the
road?” Rather, it is, “Who is crossing
the road at the same time, whom we
overlooked in our haste to observe the
chicken crossing?”
               Any violence in our humour?
Why did the chicken cross the
           road?
        DARWIN: Chickens, over great
        periods of time, have been
        naturally selected in such a way
        that they are genetically disposed
        to cross roads.
Why did the chicken cross the
           road?

 EINSTEIN: Whether the chicken
 crossed the road or the road moved
 beneath the chicken depends upon your
 frame of reference.
Why did the chicken cross the
           road?
KONRAD LORENZ: Chickens        are
          hard-wired
                        to
wander
               randomly
in search            of
                             food.
Why did the chicken cross the
           road?

 BUDDHA: Asking the question denies
 your own chicken nature.
Why did the chicken cross the
           road?
EMERSON: The chicken did not
cross the road… It transcended it.
                Any violence in our humour?
Why did the chicken cross the
           road?

TEACHER: It’s a requirement of the
ministry…a new curriculum document.
Why did the chicken cross the
           road?
CHICKEN: …. …..   ….The Rooster!..
             Any violence in our humour?
Why did the chicken cross the
           road?

HEMINGWAY:
              To die.
                   In the rain.
               Any violence in our humour?

Why did the chicken cross the road?
COLONEL SANDERS:

				
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posted:2/16/2012
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