Mark Zuckerberg_LiZhaoBin_3B111

							Mark Zuckerberg(Facebook Founder)

Done by: Li ZhaoBin (3B111)

ANGLE/FOCUS

Introduction
Describe the Introduction and its impact on you

The writer‘s story of Mark Zuckerberg depicted the change that Facebook had brought about. He
listed the example of many who have found love on Facebook, and there is the peculiar story of
Carlos Sanchez, an office administrator who received a kidney transplant from the writer, the East
Haven Mayor April Capone Almon through Facebook. The writer almost made me believe that
anything can happen on Facebook.

Sequence and Plot
How is the information organised? Is there a particular reason for this? What are the advantages/
disadvantages of using this form of organisation?

The information is organised in such a way that the story is fully the writer’s personal viewpoint of
the advantages of Facebook. She accounted the success of a kidney transplant due to Facebook. This
form of organisation helped to show the writer’s compliment of Facebook clearly.

Evidence Used

The evidence used is only the story of the writer donating her kidney to of Carlos Sanchez,
whom she had known though Facebook.


Language

Describe the tone of the writer in your CHOSEN piece. Describe the tone of the writer and
provide evidence from the text to support your answer.

How does the tone convey the writer's attitude towards the subject? Give evidence to support
your answer.

Tone                                               Evidence
Positive                                           He praised Mark Zuckerberg for revolutionizing
                                                   the internet and communication of ordinary
                                                   people.
Exciting                                           Many sensation but informal words are used,
                                                   like “You're up!” and “Answer this call!”
Attitude
Admiring                                           He gave small examples of his everyday life to
                                                   show the huge impact of Facebook


Task 1
Original Paragraph:

It is now a regular occurrence to see folks awaiting a transplant use Facebook to put out a call
to action. And the element of connecting via Facebook has generated interest that helps us
promote health, wellness and organ and tissue donation. Every year nearly 7,000 people in
the U.S. die while awaiting a transplant. I know of at least one person who survived, thanks
to Mark Zuckerberg, 26, and his little idea called Facebook.

Edited Paragraph

Miracles happen on Facebook. From transplants to finding a long-lost friend, Facebook is
one of the greatest reforms of communication. Facebook have helped generating interest in
almost all areas, including organ donations. Every year nearly 7,000 people in the U.S. die while
awaiting a transplant. I know of at least one person who survived, thanks to Mark Zuckerberg, 26,
and his marvellous invention of Facebook.

Explanation

The writer has a style of understating, with her phrases like “his little idea called Facebook”. I
tried to depict a more accurate viewpoint of Facebook.