The King is dead! Long live the King! The question is, now that the King
has died, where will he be spending the rest of eternity if not longer?
In a 2007 interview with Time Magazine, Nobel Peace Prize winner Al Gore
said, "When I was in the Snow and Ice Data Center, receiving a full
briefing on the polar ice caps, afterwards I would turn on my TV and
there were two networks with the bulletin: "Britney Spears loses custody
of her children." We're living in a madhouse if our priorities focus on
the embalming of Anna Nicole Smith, or the trial of O.J. Simpson, while
we ignore the greatest crisis this nation has ever faced."Now that
Michael Jackson has left this madhouse, the question becomes where did he
go? What religion was Michael Jackson? The funeral is going to be a joke,
a beard pulling festival as the leaders of the three religions of Abraham
fight over the corpse. With the world six years into George Bush's
Crusade, Iran threatening to nuke Israel into the dirt and Israel
threatening to stop Iran's march towards nuclear weapons, all Hell is
about to break loose. Hopefully Kim Jong il or his heir Lil' Kim will
wait until after the funeral to obliterate US. Have some respect!What
religion was Michael Jackson? Does anybody really know what time it is?
Adolf Hitler claimed that anyone with even one Jewish grandparent had to
be gassed. Michael Jackson passed on the gas and went with the needle,
porcupine style. George Michael said that the worst thing that could
happen to a singer was for them to make it. Tell that to the 5 million
MySpace musicians scratching and clawing to make it big. It doesn't get
bigger than Michael Jackson, unless you include John Lennon, Vladimir
Lenin, Joseph Stalin, Shoeless Joe Jackson, Paul McCartney, Frank
Sinatra, Barbra Streisand, Elvis Presley, Aretha Franklin and Jennifer
Love Hewitt. What were the odds that Britney Spears' backup dancer was
going to walk away with her kids and her money? Take a poll.The reason
that Satan is in the running for Michael Jackson's soul is because of the
King's alleged pole vaulting adventures with several Macaulay Culkin
clones. Did Macaulay testify at Michael Jackson's trial? What lunatic
moonwalks on the rooftop of an SUV at his own pedophilia trial in
pyjamas? Instead of a full time cardiologist the King needed a full time
psychiatrist.The Jackson family is now crying their eyes out over the
loss of the King. Which famous singer can now claim to be both the
daughter and the ex wife of the King? Incest aside, is marrying Kings
hereditary? Heretics aside, Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, the guy we will be
nuking shortly as Iran is now two months from having the bomb, himself a
musician, has banned music in Iran for its corrupting influence on the
youth, as if the elders are not corrupt. Take my crackdown,
please.President Obama is now practising his pitching warming up to throw
out the first pitch at the July 14 All Star game in Saint Louis to Henry
Paulson in the lobby. It will be sefer there. Barack is the son of a
black Kenyan Muslim father and a lily white non religious Christian woman
from Kansas. Picture Barack Obama at the Wailing Wall. Why is a wall
crying? Is it afraid of the Green Monster? Now picture Michael "Zelig"
Jackson sitting with fake spoonbender Uri Geller at the Carlebach
Synagogue on Manhattan's Upper West Side wearing a black fedora, a red
Kaballah wristband, a red silk shirt, an iridescent tie and dark
sunglasses in case Al Sharpton walked in.In November of 2008 Michael
Jackson converted to Islam and changed his name to Mikaeel at his friend
Steve Porcaro's house. At the present time Michael's personal Dr. House
seems to be on the run, like the band. The King of Pop sat on the floor
on a magic carpet wearing a small hat as an Imam officiated. Mahmoud
Ahmadinejad threw out the first pitch and then Mikaeel went through the
shahada, the Muslim declaration of belief. Unconfirmed sources have it
that Cat Stevens sang "Peace Train."While married temporarily to the
King's daughter, Michael may have dabbled in Scientology. In those days
he could afford it. Michael Jackson was born a Christian Jehovah's
Witness, like Venus and Serena Williams, but he left when he was old
enough to understand that Jehovah's Witnesses don't celebrate Christmas.
Jehovah's Witnesses believe that secular non Jehovah's Witness Society is
under the control of Satan, which brings us full circle. Perhaps if
people understood that according to Islam, Christianity and Judaism, God
of Mount Sinai, aka Allah, God the Father, Jesus Christ, the Holy Spirit,
Yehovah and Elohim was the God who carved the ten commandments in stone
himself, and then handed them to Moses, according to the Holy Scripture
of all three religions, Michael Jackson would not have been forced to
search for the same God in various Mosques, Churches or Synagogues, or
perhaps he was just hedging his bets, like Henry Paulson and Henry VIII,
the Supreme Head of the Church of England and father of Herman.