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					Lim Por Yen Fil Theatre –
      Double Bill
     2004 UE Section C
        Proofreading
    Lim Por Yen Fil Theatre –
          Double Bill
• What kind of films does the passage talk
  about?
• Have you ever seen such a film?
• Is it worthwhile to make such films?
77. The Festival of Hungry Ghosts takes place during
78. the seven lunar month. At this time the gates of hell are
79. opened to free the ghosts, then wander the world seeking
food.
• The subject is “Festival”, not “Ghosts”.
• Correct.
77. The Festival of Hungry Ghosts takes place during
78. the seven lunar month. At this time the gates of hell
are
79. opened to free the ghosts, then wander the world seeking
food.
• The problem is with “seven lunar month.”
• It’s not likely that a festival will last seven
  months. So …
• During which month will it take place?
• Replace “seven” with “seventh”.
77. The Festival of Hungry Ghosts takes place during
78. The seven lunar month. At this time the gates of hell are
79. opened to free the ghosts, then wander the world
seeking food.
• As it’s written, it sounds as if (the gates are
  opened) and then (the gates wander the
  world).
• A word is needed to make it clear that it is
  the ghosts who wander the world seeking
  food.
• Add “who” before then.
80. In HK, many Taoist organisations hold up ceremonies
81. to honour for the dead and give away rice to the elderly
and the poor.

• You do not “hold up” a ceremony.
• You can “hold up a bank”, which means to
  rob a bank with a gun.
• You can “hold up an object”, which means
  to hold something up high.
• Delete “up”.
80. In HK, many Taoist organisations hold up ceremonies
81. to honour for the dead and give away rice to the
elderly and the poor.

• If something is an honour for me, I feel
  honoured.
• The dead cannot feel honoured.
• The ceremonies are held to honour the dead.
• Replace “for” with “to”.
• N.B. give away = give for free
82. The rice distributed which is depicted in this film was
scheduled to
83. last from 9am to about 6pm but, in order to be sure a place in the
84. line, most people arrived well before dawn.

• What was scheduled to last from 9am to
  6pm?
• It was the act of giving the rice, not the rice
  itself.
• Distributed must be changed into a noun.
• Replace “distributed” with “distribution”.
82. The rice distributed which is depicted in this film was scheduled to
83. last from 9am to about 6pm but, in order to be sure a place in
the
84. line, most people arrived well before dawn.

• A preposition must follow “sure”.
• Add “of” after “sure”.
82. The rice distributed which is depicted in this film was scheduled to
83. last from 9am to about 6pm but, in order to be sure a place in the
84. line, most people arrived well before dawn.


• Correct.
85. Ngau Tau Kok Estate is one of oldest and largest
86. public housing projects in HK. Much of the residents
87. are either elderly people who live alone or working-class
families.
• An article is needed before adjectives
  ending in the suffix “–est”.
• Add “the” before “oldest.
85. Ngau Tau Kok Estate is one of oldest and largest
86. public housing projects in HK. Much of the residents
87. are either elderly people who live alone or working-class
families.
• “Residents” is countable.
• Replace “Much” with “Many” or “Most”.
85. Ngau Tau Kok Estate is one of oldest and largest
86. public housing projects in HK. Much of the residents
87. are either elderly people who live alone or working-
class families.
• They are still residents and they still live
  alone so the tenses are correct.
• Correct.
88. Since 2001, when the government it formally
announced
89. a detailed plan for redevelop the surrounding area,
90. residents gradually been relocated to new housing estates.
• “government” and “it” are the same thing.
• Delete “it”.
88. Since 2001, when the government it formally announced
89. a detailed plan for redevelop the surrounding area,
90. residents gradually been relocated to new housing estates.

• What do they plan to do?
• Replace “for” with “to”.
88. Since 2001, when the government it formally announced
89. a detailed plan for redevelop the surrounding area,
90. residents gradually been relocated to new housing
estates.
• Passive voice is appropriate.
• What tense is used with “since”.
• What is the passive form of the present
  perfect?
• Add “have” after “residents”.
91. Following two social workers who work to help the
residents
92. as they deal the difficulties of relocation, this revealing
93. documentary film, shot over several months, offered its

• You work for your employer.
• Work to describes the reason you are
  working.
• Correct.
91. Following two social workers who work to help the residents
92. as they deal the difficulties of relocation, this revealing
93. documentary film, shot over several months, offered its

• What preposition usually follows “deal”?
• Add “with” after “deal”.
91. Following two social workers who work to help the residents
92. as they deal the difficulties of relocation, this revealing
93. documentary film, shot over several months, offered its

• The film was shot in the past.
• However, you can still watch it.
• Replace “offered” with “offers”.
94. audience the glimpse into the lives of impoverished
95. old people. The film presents with a fascinating
96. group portrait showing of our parents and grandparents.

• This is the first time this glimpse is
  mentioned.
• “Offer a glimpse into …” is an expression.
• Replace “the” with “a”.
94. audience the glimpse into the lives of impoverished
95. old people. The film presents with a fascinating
96. group portrait showing of our parents and grandparents.

• You present something to someone.
• Ex.: He presented the prize to the student.
• You present someone with something.
• Ex.: He presented the student with a prize.
• Here, the film presents a group portrait of
  our parents to the audience.
• Delete “with” OR add “us” after “presents.
94. audience the glimpse into the lives of impoverished
95. old people. The film presents with a fascinating
96. group portrait showing of our parents and
grandparents.
• The film shows our parents and
  grandparents.
• We do not need a preposition after “show”.
• Delete “of”.

				
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