Coping with Feelings/ Managing Your Anger
Nicki Neumann, March 2011
(30 – 45 minutes)
Resources: Cards from Second Step, balloons, frogs with feelings written on the side,
colored dry erase markers
Fantastic Flying Feeling Frogs--think of a time when you felt… that's ok to share in class.
Raise your hand if you’d like to share a time you felt______(Happy, Sad, Afraid, Brave,
Calm, Angry)
All feelings are ok (it's what you do about your feelings that can get you into
trouble)
You can have more than one feeling at a time
If you identify and understand what you're feeling, you can deal with it better.
Sometimes it's hard to discuss your feelings
Next, we’re going to see how good your feeling vocabulary is. I’ll show pictures of 4 young
people (from Second Step)--What is he or she feeling? See how many different feelings
students can name
People show feelings with different expressions (don't assume-check it out)-- Don't
Judge a book by its cover
We’re going to focus on the feeling of anger for the rest of this lesson. It’s often a feeling
that we’re confused about or have trouble dealing with. Is Anger wrong? No, it's just a
feeling. In fact, there can be positive outcomes for being angry--pass a law, civil rights,
resolve a conflict, motivate you to act positively
Some of you have come to me saying you can't control your anger, that you can't help
it…”If someone talks about your momma…” How many of you have ever seen a 2 or 3
year old have a temper tantrum? They don't know how to deal with frustration or anger.
They may cry, bite, throw something…
Something happens and they have an immediate response (draw on board)
Event Response
This lesson will give you some suggestions of how to recognize when you're getting angry,
ways you can cope with anger better, ways to increase the time (draw on board) between
when something happens and you respond, ways to calm your body down so you can think
better and you’ll probably have a better outcome.
Event---------------------------------------------------------------------------Response
There are ways to know when you're getting angry. So, think of a time you were really
angry. Next, think about how your body felt.
--Draw “gingerbread man” on the board and ask students the physical signs of anger—you
color the gingerbread man in with a red marker:
Breathe fast or have trouble breathing
Headache
Nauseous
Sweaty
Stomach tight or butterflies
Pounding heart
Face turns red
Hot
May cry
Look at the angry person. Is he going to make a good decision?
Your body is getting you ready to act. If you become aware of how your body reacts, you
can make your body calm down and not do something you'll regret later.
Metaphor—draw on board
Light a match Fire of Anger Pail of water
Event Fueling the fire Cool talk
Angry thoughts A.M. Techniques
Hot talk What we tell ourselves
Peer Pressure
What we tell ourselves
Let’s practice some Anger Management Techniques: Add time between event and your
reaction
1--Take 3 deep breaths—(let air out slowly, relax your body as you let the air out,
say comforting things to yourself (I can handle this…). This gives you time to be rational
2—Count to 10—not fast—Students count slowly together and you can add in
positive, encouraging comments. Sometimes, you need to remove yourself from the
situation, relax and thing, before you decide what to do.
3—Visualization—give example of taking a mini-vacation in your mind
4--Cool talk—(draw match, fire and bucket with water on the board) Talking to
yourself is a vary sane thing to do! I'm ok, I can handle this, it's not worth getting in
trouble for, it’s not the end of the world…
5--Solve the problem-talk to someone, mediation, ignore, joke
6--action at another time--hit a pillow, ride a bike, sports, run, music, read, journal
Group work: Ask students to respond to the situation using this chart below—or verbally
give the examples and ask the students to respond
Situation Feelings Hot Thoughts Cool Thoughts Anger
Management
Your friend Techniques
texts you that
no one likes
you
Situation Feelings Hot Thoughts Cool Thoughts Anger
Management
Your parents Techniques
won't let you
go to a movie
Review lesson