Rock
Star
Have you ever been so in love with somebody, that you want to spend every day of
your life with them, never be away from them, but also have them be your living
nightmare, and the one person who can make your blood boil.
Well, its like that for Charlie and Jess.
“Your wrong”
“I`m not wrong”
“Your wrong”
“I am NOT wrong”
“YES you are, if the cup has only a half amount of juice in it then its half full, none
of this half empty shit”
“Charlie, see it from both sides, if Apple Juice is poured into the cup to the
halfway point and no further then it is half full, if it was full to begin with then
somebody drank some, then its half empty”
They lapsed into silence. Charlie stared straight ahead, concentrating on the road.
“Your wrong” he murmered.
Jess had to giggle. She leant over and tickled Charlie’s thigh.
“Oi, don`t make me drag you onto the back seat” he laughed, seizing her wrist.
“Hmm” she teased, tickling him again.
“Right -you asked for it” he replied in a mock serious tone. Charlie pulled over and
climbed into the back.
“C’monnnn” he said, tugged on Jess’s jacket and pulled her backwards into the
backseat.
Charlie and Jess had a love/hate relationship. Simple. Sometimes they loved each
other, sometimes they hated each other. The love and hate balanced out evenly
though, most of the time. The two always managed to work out their problems.
They had been going out since the age of 16, making that two years. They were
unbelievably in love and already owned a small house together. This particular
weekend they had been visiting Jess’s and then Charlie’s families.
“Ohh its SO good to be home” sighed Jess happily, flopping down onto the dark
blue sofa inside their living room. Charlie walked in after her, carrying his black
Nike luggage carrier and Jess’s Louis Vuitton luggage carrier.
“Be nice if some people helped carry the luggage” Charlie half joked.
Jess stared at Charlie. She was mesmerized whenever she looked at Charlie. He
was her dream boy. Tall, broad shoulders, chiselled features, gorgeous hypnotic
eyes and blondish brown spiked hair. Charlie’s mobile phone beeped, signalling a
received message. Jess stared at him quizzically as he read the message, eyes wide
and a big grin.
“Fucking wicked!” he exclaimed. Charlie looked at a confused Jess.
“We got the gig, Jess, we got the fucking gig!”
Jess jumped up, running into Charlie’s arms. He swung her around in circles while
gasping “I can’t fucking believe it”
Charlie was in a band with two friends, Matt and James. They had tried for months
to get recognized, and now finally, after endless gigs in pubs and clubs, a man
from a record label had spotted them.
“This is fucking amazing, Jess, its what we’ve wanted for so long” he laughed,
leaning his face against hers.
Jess nodded, the smile on her face becoming strained. She was happy for Charlie,
but the truth was, she didn’t want to lose him to the music industry. Drugs,
screaming girls, tours, being away from home. It scared her to think of Charlie
being so vulnerable to all of this. Jess knew Charlie could take care of himself, but
it was a worry all the same.
“Jess..whats wrong?” Charlie asked, his voice full of concern. He stopped dancing
about and sat beside Jess on the couch. She felt like a bitch putting dampeners on
Charlie’s happiness, so she pretended her tears of fear were tears of joy. Jess
wrapped her arms around Charlie’s neck.
“I’m so happy for you baby” she whispered.
Jess forced herself to hold her tears back until bedtime. She waited until her and
Charlie were sprawled in their double bed. It was early summer so the weather was
humid, meaning their bedroom window was left open. The net curtain blew in the
soft breeze.
Jess turned onto her side and watched Charlie’s face while he slept. He was so
perfect. The light from the moon enhanced his features making him look a little
more than irresistible. Jess sighed. A solitary cheek running down her cheek. She
turned on her side and closed her eyes.
“I love you, Jess, nothing will ever keep me from you” came Charlie’s whispering
husky voice. He draped his arm over her shoulders and pulled her closer.
“I love you too, Charlie” she replied, her voice quivering.
Jess couldn’t believe how Charlie had read her mind. Sometimes he was so perfect.
She wanted to tell him more, she wanted to tell him how scared she was of losing
him, and how the thought of him not being there ate her up inside. But before she
could, Charlie had turned her onto her back and was staring into her face. He was
breathing hard and it was hot and minty against her face.
Charlie moaned her name gently. Jess closed her eyes and savoured the feeling of
Charlie above her. He hardened against her. Charlie moved down and began to kiss
her neck, slowly unclipping her baby pink bra. Within minutes they had removed
all traces of underwear and were in a passionate embrace.
The morning sun shining on Jess’s face woke her at midday the next morning.
Charlie was standing in just a pair of jeans at his wardrobe, cursing. When he
turned around and spotted her awake he frowned.
“Where the fuck is my white t-shirt?” he exclaimed,
The loving smile on Jess’s face disappeared at his outburst.
“Erm…I think..I think its in the washing basket” she mumbled.
“For fucks sake” he muttered, pulling on a beige one, which in Jess’s opinion made
him look sexy because it brought out his eyes and his gorgeous natural tan.
“It was in there to be fucking washed, Jessica” he growled, as he slammed the
bedroom door behind him.
“I`m not your fucking maid, Charlie” I cried, as I heard him slam the door shut
downstairs.
This was yet another example of their simple love/hate.
A text from Charlie arrived at about 4pm, four hours after his tantrum. Jess
picked up her Nokia 3410 and read the text. It read:
JESS, SOZ 4 EARLIER, WAS
PISSED COS I WAS ALMOST L8
4 GIG. GOING GOOD SO FAR,
MISS U LOADS, THANKS 4 LAST
NITE. LOVE YA
CHARLIE XX
Charlie’s reference to last night brought the tingles back to Jess body. There had
been nothing for her to do all day so she had slouched around the house in fitted
grey tracksuit bottoms and a white vest top. Having this much time on her hands
enabled her to imagine what it would be like if Charlie became a jet-setting pop
star.
The cordless phone beside Jess started to ring and it startled her. Sighing, she
answered.
“Hiya hon, its Ani”
Anouska was Jess’s best friend and had been since they were 12. Anouska had
grown up with both Jess and Charlie and while she had seen them go through all
types of problems, she had to admit that Jess and Charlie seemed perfect for each
other.
“Hi An, what you up to?”
“A group of us are going out to that new club Milo’s tonight -coming?”
Jess sighed. It had been so long since she had hung out with Anouska and
everyone, but she really should be here for Charlie when he came home.
“Hmmm, I`m sorry An, but today’s Charlie’s big gig, with the record company
bloke, I really should be here to hear his news when he gets in”
Jess heard Anouska sigh on the other end of the line.
“No offence, Jess, but Charlie reckons EVERY gig is “the big one” when’s he
gonna be realistic and forget all this pop star shit?”
Jess frowned, wanting to instantly jump to Charlie’s defence. Her guilt at turning
down her friends invitation disappeared and she found herself feeling irritated.
Instead of responding, she hung up.
As if on cue, Charlie burst through the door, followed by Matt and James. His
guitar was hanging on his back, he dropped it onto the couch and grabbed Jess with
all his might.
“We did it, Jess, we fucking did it, he wants to give us a contract!”
“Charlie that’s awesome” she breathed into his ear.
“I know..I really can’t believe it, now I have to go and pack”
Jess was smiling until she heard the last bit.
“Huh?” she said, confused, “pack for what?”
Charlie looked at her as if she was slow.
“Jess, the record company is based in London, we have to go up there for this
weekend to sort it all out…your welcome to come” he added eagerly, glancing at
Matt and James, who stood there with uncomfortable smiles plastered on their
faces.
Jess looked from Matt and James back to Charlie again.
“Forget it…you go…have fun”
Matt relaxed onto the sofa, grinning at Jess.
“So..great news huh, Jess?”
Jess forced a smile at Matt.
“Mmm” she replied, non-commitedly.
This is it, she thought after the three boys had left and Charlie had given her a kiss
and promised to call, this is where it all starts. The endless nights of being alone,
having to rely on phone calls and texts to know where abouts in the country her
boyfriend was.
The night dragged by slowly. Jess had never felt so restless, there was nothing on
television, all her friends were out, it was starting to rain, and worst still, Charlie
wasn’t here.
Jess sighed, and decided the only thing left to do was to check her email. After
connecting to AOL, three little words that echoed around the silence of the room
made her jump. “You have email”.
Jess raised an eyebrow and clicked “Open”, she was surprised to see that under
“Sender” it read “Charlie Simpson”. Biting her lip, she opened the email.
It was about three paragraphs long:
“Jess,
Well, there’s no real easy way to say this Jess, so I think had better come
straight out and say it. We’re getting busier and busier, Jess, and right now I just
don’t feel I have time for a girlfriend anymore. This is me following my dreams, so
maybe you should just move on-”
“Ohh” groaned Jess, a loud, shrill noise making her jump out of her bad dream.
She glanced around for the offending sound. The phone.
“Its 11.30 at night” she mumbled to herself.
Leaning over the side of the couch, Jess answered sleepily.
“Babe, its Charlie”
“Charlie” she murmered
“Jess I just wanted to apologize for earlier, how quickly I left and that” he said
genuinely.
“Baby its ok, I understand, you, you had to go, its fine”
“I miss you” he whispered lovingly, his voice going husky as it always did when
he lowered it.
“I miss you too, baby”
“Listen..I`ll call you tomorrow, I have to be up at six, we’re meeting this guy at the
office early tomorrow to go through the contract -I’m so fucking excited, Jess. Its
really happening”
Jess smiled at his child-like excitement.
“It is, baby, good luck. I’ll speak to you tomorrow”
“Bye, babe” Charlie whispered, then hung up.
The next day Jess woke up with the same feeling in her stomach. It was an uneasy
feeling. Part of her wanted Charlie to be happy and achieve everything he had ever
wanted, because next to her his guitar and music was his love. But the dream last
night had freaked her out too much. Would it happen? Would Charlie decide he
didn’t have time for her anymore?
On the other hand, if Charlie didn’t achieve his goal…he’d be here all the time like
he always had. Then Jess wouldn’t be alone at night. Or ever.
She shook her head, shocked by her thoughts.
“I do want Charlie to succeed” she told herself, “I do, I do, I do”
Jess needn’t have worried. The next couple of months went by in a blur for her.
Charlie and his friends had got their contract, and were constantly busy promoting.
Soon was the time for the release of their first single, “What I go to school for”.
That was the first time Jess had seen Charlie in 4 weeks, the day the video was
being filmed.
Jess sighed, and slumped down further on the sofa. She was inside the bands
trailer, looking out at the work being done. Charlie, Matt and James were dressed
in funky school uniforms. Jess bit her lip as she watched a handful of girls flirting
with Charlie. All dressed in titchy school uniforms, bouncing about, flicking their
hair and stroking his arm.
The sun shone through the window of the trailer, creating an unbearable heat. Jess
fanned herself and decided to step outside the trailer for some air. She was wearing
a short, white pleated skirt, and a pink fishnet vest with a pink bra underneath. She
flicked back her shining brown hair and opened the metal door.
Instantly, girls surrounding the boys all turned and looked at her.
“Who’s that?” asked a redhead girl with obvious distaste.
“Apparently its Charlie’s girl” whispered a tall blonde girl. They all watched her.
“Breaktime people, break time, go have lunch, be back in ten” yelled the director.
Jess leant against the trailer, smoking a cigarette, watching Charlie, who was still
holding his guitar, signing autographs and taking photos with squealing girls.
Charlie smiled apologetically at her, and held his hand up to signal “1 minute”.
Jess raised her eyebrows and smiled, looking about her at her surroundings, she
slowly exhaled. This wasn’t what she had planned. Her and Charlie were meant to
be together forever, undisturbed. These girls were beautiful, that she couldn’t deny,
it would be hard for an 18 year old boy to resist temptation constantly. It made her
ache inside.
“Hi baby” came Charlie’s husky voice from above her, he planted a soft kiss on
Jess’s head.
“Hi” Jess replied casually, flicking her cigarette away.
Charlie sighed.
“Jess, I’m sorry about this, we were told we have to try and seem, you
know..available. My manager knows I’m not”
Jess forced a smile.
“So..you`ll spend tonight with me?” he asked eagerly, leaning against the trailer.
Jess nodded, a rush of excitement running through her despite the previous feeling
of dread. Charlie would break up with her tonight. She knew it. Just like in the
dream, she thought.
Pretty soon the music to the single was started again and the boys went back to
filming. Jess sighed. She was happy for Charlie, she was. He looked so happy
doing this, and was a total natural. The camera loved him, even the girls loved him.
Jess wasn’t being biased, but to her it was evident who the favourite was, and she
wasn’t surprised. With Charlie’s model boy looks any girl would be crazy not to
find him attractive.
“But he’s mine” Jess whispered to herself. Anouska had told her she should enjoy
making fans jealous, but she didn’t want that. She wanted to be back home with
Charlie. It was all so new to her.
“That’s what I go to school for……” Charlie mimed the last line of the song while
looking sexily into the camera, James glanced at Charlie, and Matt grinned at them
both. This was a moment they would never forget.
That night as she applied her make-up in the mirror, she looked down at her attire.
A long white fitted dress, which clung to every curve. Her shining brunette hair
swished around in waves over her tanned shoulders and the pale colour of the dress
brought out her tan perfectly.
Tonight she was finally back with Charlie. A whole night alone with him. Jess
smiled at her reflection, she had been over-reacting. Charlie loved her. Nothing
could shake them.
“Babes you ready?” came Charlie’s voice from outside the bathroom.
“Coming right out, babe” she called back, applying more lip gloss.
Charlie gasped when he saw her.
“Shiiit” he moaned, looking her up and down and lingering on the middle of her
body. He grabbed her arm abruptly and pulled her close, “ you look amazing” he
whispered, rubbing his nose softly against her neck, causing a tingling sensation.
Jess breathed in Charlie’s familiar scent. It was a mixture of his after-shave and
something that was just Charlie Simpson.
After tearing themselves away from each others hold, they went downstairs to the
restaurant at the Dorchester. Everything was so glistening and expensive looking.
Matt and James had decided to go straight on to a club, leaving Jess and Charlie
alone.
“You know, Jess” said Charlie, playing with his Champagne glass, “there’s a lot I
want to say to you tonight”
Jess panicked. A lump rising in her right, she lifted up her glass and tried to
swallow it back.
“Uh huh” she managed.
Charlie reached across the table and cupped his hand around hers.
“These past few months have gone by in a crazy rush, and I’ve never had the time
to thank you”
Jess looked up, startled.
“Thank me?”
“Yeah” he replied enthusiastically, “Jess you’ve been amazing. Not many girls
would have hung around in this situation. I know it hasn’t been easy for you what
with me never being around”
Jess felt tears bubbling behind her eyelids. Not wanting Charlie to see, she looked
down at the white tablecloth. It was such a relief for Charlie to know how it had
been for her.
“Charlie-”
“Wait, Jess” he added, holding up a hand to halt her, “I want you to know that
whatever happens, wherever Busted go with this, I will always…always love you”
This was it.
“Charlie” Jess sobbed, “I don’t want to lose you”
“You won’t babe…not if you don’t want to. Because if either of us is going to end
it it will have to be you. Cos’ I need you, Jess”
“Ohh, Charlie” Jess breathed, leaning further forward, “ I really needed to hear you
say that”
Jess got up and moved around the side of the table to Charlie, and leant into his
arms. Charlie held her close, feeling like a total selfish bastard. He squeezed his
eyes shut to hold back the unwelcome tears.
When he was sure Jess was in a deep sleep, he slipped out of bed and onto the
balcony. Looking out at the late night traffic on Park Lane below, Charlie lit a
cigarette. Exhaling, he thought of Jess and the situation in the restaurant earlier. He
hadn’t expected her to cry.
Charlie leant back on the lounge chair, staring up at the stars. Am I so wrapped up
in myself that I’ve totally ignored how Jess may be feeling? He thought to himself,
God only knows how much I love her, but this is going to be hard.
Charlie pursed his lips together angrily and slammed his fist down on the table.
Stubbing out his cigarette, he pushed the glass door back and went inside,
determined to make his relationship with Jess work.
The next day, the boys were told they needed to fly to Paris.
“Wow” Jess breathed excitedly, sitting up on the bed. Paris! She thought of the
shops and the Arc de Truimphe, and having a romantic night in the restaurant at the
top of the Eiffel Tower with Charlie.
Charlie looked discomfited.
“Jess..its probably best you stay at home”
He hated himself for saying it. He hated making Jess feel that way. But to have her
around for the next few days would make it harder for him.
“Oh” replied Jess. She was shocked and hurt at the bluntness in Charlie’s voice,
“well..ok. I’ll just leave then”
Jess hopped off the bed and ran into the bathroom. There was that feeling again.
That one in the pit of her stomach. It had been there since Charlie had first got into
this. Right from the day he had gotten the text message about the “big gig”.
Without warning, Jess was sick. Luckily she had managed to aim it into the toilet
bowl. Sitting back on the cool tiled floor, Jess wiped her mouth and flushed the
chain.
Why doesn’t he want me around him, she thought sadly, was what he said last
night not true?
Slipping on a pink fitted camisole dress, and a tight pink cardigan, Jess left the
bathroom to pack her things.
Charlie, who was sitting on the edge of the bed strumming in his guitar, watched
her. How does she manage to look so effortlessly gorgeous, he wondered.
After a painful silence, Jess glanced at Charlie and zipped up her Louis Vuitton
luggage carrier.
“Well..I`m all ready, so..I suppose this is goodbye -again” she added the last part to
spite Charlie for his declining her offer to join them in Paris, France.
Charlie rubbed his eyes, sensing her hurt.
“I promise I’ll be home soon, Jess, you knew this was a part of my job”
Anger bubbled inside Jess, and was forcing its way out.
“I KNEW?! Charlie, you didn`t give me a CHOICE! You buggered off to London
the SAME day you found out about this, I didn’t have a minute to say a thing to
you cos’ you were already on your high horse. I haven’t had a say in any of this
Charlie”
“Jess.. This is my dream ok? You knew that!”
Jess slumped down on the bed, with her head in her hands.
“Yes, Charlie, I do know that. But you know what my dream is? To be with you,
and I thought that next to this music thing that that was your dream too”
“It is, Jess”
“Well you know what? Right now I can’t say I believe that. I`m pleased for you,
Charlie, really I am. But please, stop shutting me out”
“But I`m not-” he began.
Jess shook her head, and smiled slightly, placing a manicured finger on Charlie’s
lips to silence him.
“I’m going now, baby. And its down to you to make the next move. Because you
know something?” Jess said, her voice cracking, as she lifted up her bag, “There’s
only so much hurt I can take from being shut out by you, Charlie, so, I’m going to
back off and leave you alone, and if you need me, you know where I am”
And with a final kiss on Charlie’s cheek, Jess left the Dorchester,
The driver Charlie had called to take Jess home was waiting downstairs, and while
Jess looked defiant, inside she was crying. Because she realised that, if Charlie
HAD been lying about how he felt about her and where he wanted their
relationship to go, then what she had said to him just now would guarantee she
wouldn’t hear from him again.
Please, Charlie, she thought, please don’t give up on his.
Jess watched as the hotel got smaller and smaller, and then out of sight.
“Switch over, switch over! Its on, its on!” cried Jess, hurrying into the living room
while Anouska fiddled with the radio buttons.
“95.8!”
“Ok,ok, chill” Anouska laughed in disbelief.
It had been a week since the release of “What I go to school for” and the
following Sunday would be the day when the songs chart position would be
announced.
“Right” came the distant voice of the radio DJ, “at number 3 this week, a new
entry! This guys are awesome and I wish them the best of luck…Its Busted, and
“What I go to school for”
“OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD” squealed Jess, jumping up and down on
the couch.
“NUMBER 3!” cried Anouska
“I can’t believe it” Jess laughed flopping back down onto the couch again.
The phone on the table beside her rang. It had been 3 months since her night with
Charlie at the Dorchester. He had been home twice since, and other random days
off were spent at his families house in Ipswich. They had spoken various times,
and spent some time together.
“Hellooooo, Jess here, girlfriend of sexy pop star”
A deep throaty laugh followed her introduction.
“Jess? Babe? It me, Charlie”
Jess smiled.
“I know which “me” it is! Congratulations, Charlie”
Anouska glanced up at her on hearing Charlie’s name. She thought that after that
night in London that was the unofficial end of their relationship. Jess and Charlie
had always been known to have rows and spend days apart, but not without some
contact. This time, though, it was different. Charlie was a celebrity and had his
pick of many girls, famous girls included.
“Thanks, Jess, we’re over the moon” he smiled.
Jess waited, knowing he hadn’t finished. He wanted to say something else.
“Jess…I miss you SO much”
Jess sighed and closed her eyes,
“I miss you too”
“I love you, Jessie” he whispered huskily.
Jess sighed.
“I..love you too, Charlie”
Charlie breathed a sigh of relief.
“Listen, I know it’s a little while a way, but in a month I have 2 weeks off, I want
to spend every single minute of it with you”
“Really?”
“Really”
“Where?”
“I don’t care -a fucking pig sty for all I care, as long as I’m with you, Jess”
“I can’t wait” Jess breathed.
“Neither can I baby. I’m sorry -I had better go, some crazy German girls down
there waiting for photos” he said with a laugh.
Jess hung up the phone feeling a whole weight had been lifted off her shoulders.
Despite this, it didn’t stop the feeling of nausea in her stomach.
“Oh shit” she muttered quickly, before sprinting to the downstairs toilet and being
sick. After five minutes, she saw Anouska leaning against the door frame looking
thoughtful, chewing strawberry laces.
“You know, Jess, I COULD be wrong, but isn’t that the eighth time you’ve been
sick this week?”
“Mmm-hmm” Jess replied, spitting.
“So….don’t you think you should check if your pregnant?”
Jess gasped, and gaped up at Anouska, eyes wide.
“An..you don’t think?”
“It would sure make sense” Anouska pointed out, walking away from the bathroom
door and sitting on the edge of the couch.
“Ohhhh NO! This isn’t part of the plan!” Jess cried, running out of the bathroom.
“What plan?” Anouska asked curiously.
“THE plan! You know…the one I made when me and Charlie first started seeing
each other!”
Jess fished out a notebook from the Stella McCartney bag from under her bed and
handed it to Anouska.
“Ah” Anouska realised, “this plan! I haven’t seen this since we were sixteen, Jess, I
can’t believe you kept it”
Anouska opened the notebook. On the first page was a photo of Jess and Charlie at
their school prom. Charlie’s arms were wrapped around Jess and they were both
smiling like mad. Underneath Jess had written “CHARLIE `N` JESS 4EVER”
On the next page was The Plan.
“See” observed Jess, pointing near the bottom of the page, “kids weren’t brought
into the plan until we were at least 28”
“Ohh yes” replied Anouska, a little disturbed by Jess’s attention to detail.
“Well, anyway, Jess” Anouska smiled, moving the notebook to one side, “you’ll
have to tell him”
“Oh…An..I don’t know”
“Well would you keep it?” she asked, curling her legs up underneath her and
staring curiously into Jess’s faces.
“I have no idea, An, look..lets find out if I AM first, ok? Before we go messing up
the plan”
Anouska rolled her eyes.
“You and that sodding plan” she teased, playfully hitting Jess round the head with
the cushion.
“Come on Charlie, mate, this our night for celebrating. You sit over there, me and
James’ll get the drinks in” shouted Matt of the loud beat of the music.
Charlie nodded and slid into a strobe lit booth. He rubbed his eyes. He was tired,
he hadn’t slept since they arrived in Germany. Everything was going crazy at the
moment. And he loved it. The fame, the money, the girls. Except for him it was
going so fast that he was afraid he wouldn’t have any recollection of it when he
looked back.
Charlie also missed Jess. It frightened him how independent she was getting
nowadays. Almost like she didn’t need him.
“Ere’ ya go mate” came Matt’s voice from above him, as he placed a Smirnoff Ice
in front of him.
“Cheers”
“This is unreal” remarked James, looking about him at the VIP area of
UBER-LIFE, the most exclusive club in Berlin.
“I know” agreed Matt, taking a sip of lager and following Jame’s gaze.
“Fuck me -look!”
Charlie turned in his seat and looked in the direction of James nod.
It was `Studz n Barz`, a rock group that had been around for years and were very
much a favourite with Charlie, Matt and James.
One of the band members, Shnide, turned and glared back at the boys. At this
moment they all pretended to be looking in different directions.
“Oh shit” Matt muttered, facing his lager glass, but eyes facing upwards.
“Their coming over”
“Orite, boys” came the slurring voice of Shnide.
“We recognize you” slurred the voice of the other band member, Roxx.
“Busted -innit?”
“Er…yeah, that’s right” Matt said, nodding.
“Cool, good song, good effort” Roxx said, holding out a hand to shake.
Roxx and Shnide kept supplies of alcohol coming all night. And by 1am. Charlie
was plastered, in fact, so were Matt and James. They were all sitting in a very
“matey” way in the strobe light booth, and had been for the past four hours.
“Here, boys” slurred an even more drunken Shnide, “get a load of some of this. it’s
the bollocks”. He produced a small bag of cocaine.
Charlie, Matt and James all gaped at it. Charlie was unbelievably drunk, he knew
this himself, and probably wasn’t as shocked about the drugs as he would be under
normal circumstances.
“Every-true-rockstar-uses” recited Roxx, grinning a toothy grin at boys.
While Charlie downed the rest of his drink, Roxx and Shnide set up.
“Ere ya go, Charles, av’ summa this”
Shnide held it under Charlie’s nose.
“Snort! Snort! Snort!” cried Roxx and Shnide in unison, then broke into fits of
laughter.
Without another thought, Charlie snorted the white powder, stunned by the reaction
he got. Matt and James started slamming the table in a supporting motion and Matt
lit up a spliff,
Charlie basked in the sensations that the cocaine brought, he felt light-hearted and
care-free. This was the life, this really was the life.
“Two minutes to go” mumbled Jess, staring down at the Clear Blue pregnancy test.
Anouska squeezed her hand supportively.
“It’ll all be ok, hon” she whispered.
Jess began to pace the bathroom. It had taken all of a yesterday for Anouska to
convince Jess to buy a test, so first thing this morning they had driven to the local
pharmacy for one. The lady behind the counter used to be Jess and Charlie’s dinner
lady at school, and knew exactly what was going on when she served them.
Now, back in the safety of their blue and aqua bathroom, Jess had followed the
instructions, and was waiting.
“Oh my God, its changing!” cried Anouska.
Jess was breathless. Anouska was right, if another blue line appeared next to the
default one, she was positive. And there it was, a thin, but very visible line had
appeared.
“Ohhh” Jess slumped against the bath, her head spinning. She was pregnant. With
Charlie’s baby. How was he going to react? Tears released themselves from the
back of her eyes and Jess began to sob.
“Ohhh, hey, hon” Anouska murmered, pulling Jess into a comforting hug, “look..I
know this wasn’t part of, you know, THE PLAN” she soothed, putting on a
dramatic voice at the end of the sentence, “and is probably a bit premature, but you
and Charlie love each other. it’s a baby, Jess, a little human, Charlie will be so
happy, and so will you”
Jess gave Anouska a watery smile.
“Do you think so?” she asked eagerly. Anouska smiled back and leant her head
against Jess’s.
“I know so”
The first thing Charlie was aware of the next day was the throbbing pain in his
head.
“Ohhh man” he muttered, his voice catching. He turned over in bed and rubbed his
head as if trying to rub away his actions the night before. Charlie stared at the
ceiling. The drink…then Studz n Barz turned up, and then the drugs….
Before they left last night, Charlie started feeling sleepy and leant on the booth
table in front of him.
“Ohh hey, pop star, wake up” laughed Shnide gruffly in his ear, “have some of this,
it will liven you up a bit”
And Charlie had been so out of it he had accepted the small white pill with open
arms. Livening up was exactly what he had needed right then.
An abrupt knocking on his hotel room door made him jump.
“Charlie! Come on mate we have to leave for the airport in ten minutes”
Matt came barrelling in and sat on Charlie’s bed.
“Yeah, yeah alright”
“You look like shit, mate” Matt observed.
Charlie sprayed some deodorant and pulled on a t-shirt, then disappeared into the
en-suite bathroom. While changing and brushing his teeth, the room was spinning
around him.
Within ten minutes he had thrown his things into his bag. Staring guiltily back at
the mess he had left his room in, Charlie closed the door.
Another day, another country, Charlie thought dejectedly. More than anything he
wanted to be at home. The hurdy-gurdy ringtone of his Nokia 6610 jolted his
thoughts, It was flashing JESS MOB.
“Hello” he mumbled sleepily, although inside his heart was dancing. Charlie
wouldn’t wait to hear Jess’s voice.
“Hi baby” came Jess’s sweet sounding voice, “are you okay” she asked, sounding
concerned.
“Oh yeah, fine, just going to the airport. I feel a bit sick actually…..are you ok?” he
asked, rubbing his eyes and leaning back on the tour bus seat.
“Well..that’s actually what I’m calling you about, I need to see you Charlie….”
“Oh, I know babe, I really want to see you too…I know the month until my
holiday is long, but-”
“No, Charlie, I need to come and see you, I have something to tell you”
“Is it bad?” Charlie asked, eyes wide.
“No!” Jess replied quickly, “well…at least..I don’t think so”
“Well…we`re heading back to France now…meet me there? Is that alright?”
Jess smiled with relief.
“That’s fine…actually Charlie, I’m glad you said okay, because I already booked
my flight”
“How did you-”
“I spoke to Fletch already”
“Oh”
“So…I`ll be there tomorrow, okay? About 8pm?”
“That’s cool…I’ll send someone to pick you up”
“Bye baby”
Arriving in Paris was daunting for Charlie. They had been all over the place this
week, and were now back in a totally different time-zone. It was 4pm now. After
laying out his toiletries in the bathroom, and a few clothes into the wardrobe,
Charlie sat on the bed wondering how to pass the hours before Jess arrived.
“Oi, Chaz, open up”
Charlie opened the cream, wooden door lined with gold paint and faced Matt, who
was wearing a blue t-shirt and jeans.
“Coming to the bar downstairs?”
“Er, yeah, why not”
I will not get drunk, he promised himself, I’ll just have a few drinks to pass the
time. They met James at a table downstairs, he had already got a round in.
“Bastard almost wouldn’t serve me” he complained, shooting the barman an icy
look.
Matt laughed, “can’t help it if you look 15 can ya mate” he teasted, punching
James playfully on the arm.
Charlie sipped his lager and looked around them. It was mainly all older couples
and business people, but a table just to the right of them caught his eye. Three girls
about his age caught his eye. One of them turned and smiled at him. Matt was next
to spot them.
“Oi, oi, we’re in there, look at them” he burbled excitedly.
A grinning blonde raised an eyebrow at Matt, Matt nodded his head, signalling for
the girls to come and sit with them. The three girls stood up and strutted over to the
boy’s table.
“Hi…I`m Asha” smiled a girl who looked surprisingly like Jess.
“Charlie” he replied, smiling back. He found himself mesmerized by her eyes, the
way he was by Jess’s. Everything about her screamed Jess. The way she looked,
smelt, and flicked her hair. Charlie glanced at his watch.
It was only 4.45pm.
By 7pm, Charlie was hammered.
“So, listen, Charlie” murmered Asha, playing with the neckline of her white CK
dress, “would you like to..take this upstairs?”
Charlie, unsure of what Asha had asked him, nodded.
“Bye girls” Asha giggled, winking at her friends. Matt and James stared after
Charlie in disbelief.
The first thing Charlie did was loosen his shirt which felt as if it was strangling
him. When he turned around, Asha had slipped out of her dress and was lying on
the bed. Leaning upwards slightly, She grabbed Charlie’s neck and pulled him on
top of her, into a deep, passionate kiss.
I can’t believe I’m here, thought Jess excitedly, leaving the lobby of the Grand
Hotel in Paris and walking into the expensive looking lift. Jess smiled to herself,
trembling slightly. In just a few minutes she would be in Charlie’s arms and the
feeling of loneliness that plagued her whenever he was away.
Walking along the plush, peach carpeting of the 8th floor, Jess finally spotted room
76, Charlie’s room. The door was slightly ajar, she guessed Charlie must have
deliberately left it like that for her. Jess pushed open the door, a grin spreading
across her face.
“Charlie,I-”
Jess froze. Her words also freezing on her lips.
There..on the king size bed, was Charlie, curled up in the arms of a girl who looked
scarily similar to her. The girl grinned an evil smile, spotting her before Charlie
did.
“Hi there -you must be Jess” she giggled, her voice dripping with satisfaction. Her
brunette hair was spread out across the pillow.
Charlie’s head spun to face her, his eyes wide with panic. He stumbled off the bed
and ran towards her., his trousers falling slightly. Jess noticed that the buckle and
zip were undone.
“Jess-” he squealed frantically.
“Fuck you, Charlie” she cried, then spun on her heel and ran and ran until she
reached the lift. The tears
Please open before he gets me, she prayed. And it did.
As Jess left the lobby of the Grand Hotel, she felt her stomach heartbreakingly.
Suddenly a baby of Charlie’s was the last thing she wanted.
“Fuck!” Charlie yelled angrily, doing up his trousers and pulling on a t-shirt, “fuck,
fuck, fuck, I don’t believe this!”
Asha stood up seductively.
“Don’t worry honey” she purred into his ear, “she’ll get over it”
Charlie sighed, suddenly feeling completely sober but with the side effects of a
hangover.
“Listen, Ashley, maybe you should leave…”
Asha angrily pulled on her dress, how dare he reject her. Asha was suffering more
from a bruised ego than actual anger. Her and her friends assumed a rock star was a
sure thing. Obviously not.
“My name is ASHA” she spat, opening the door. “LOSER!” Asha hissed back at
him, before slamming the door shut, causing the glasses of Champagne on the
bedside table to rattle. Charlie ran his hands through his hair in frustration. He
didn’t have a clue where Jess could have got to by now, but he would have to look.
Grabbing the key, he ran out the door.
“Come on, come on” he cursed under his breath, annoyed the lift was taking so
long. He sighed in anger and went down the red carpeted stairs three at a time,
desperate to catch up with Jess.
Jess sat sobbing on the bench beside the taxi rank. Her initial plan was take a cab
back to the airport to go home, but a Frenchman walking past had explained in
very limited English that taxis would be another half hour. So she decided to wait.
Pulling her jacket tighter around her, Jess stared at the puddles on the ground. The
rain was still coming down hard, much to Jess’s relief, as having people stare at her
crying would make the situation worse. She sobbed silently to herself. Jess could
feel her heart literally splitting in two. This was it. It was over. The day she knew
was going to come one way or another.
Jess wiped her nose with an old tissue in her pocket. The baby growing inside her
no longer welcome. Jess made up her mind. If Charlie was no longer hers, then no
longer was his baby. Anouska was wrong, they wouldn’t live happily ever after.
“Jess….JESS!”
Jess looked up quickly, and there, amongst all the tourists viewing
“Paris-by-night”, was Charlie, his shirt splattered with rain drops and his face wet,
frantically running towards her.
“Jess -please! I’m sorry I’m so sorry” he begged, leaning over to catch his breath,
“How could you do this to me, Charlie? HOW?!”, Jess’s voice came out in a
strangled sob. Her voice cracked, “I thought you loved me”
Charlie slumped on the bench beside her, holding his head in his hands.
“Ohh, Jess, I DO love you…more than you could ever know”
Jess glared angrily at him.
“You call that love? No, Charlie, just go away and leave me alone, we’re over,
finished, finito, ok?!”
Charlie shook his head, grabbing Jess’s wrists in a desperate bid to stop her
walking away.
“Jess no…I was drunk! I still fucking am! I didn’t know what was happening…we
didn’t have sex I promise, we didn’t even do anything. Jess I promise you, I
promise!”
Jess felt like her lungs were going to burst, and she released the breath she had
been holding. She wanted to believe him. And even if he was telling the truth, Jess
was hurting too much right now.
“You know why I came here, Charlie?”
Charlie looked up at her, waiting.
“I came to tell you…to tell you that I was pregnant”
Charlie’s jaw dropped. He didn’t think he had heard her right.
“Pregnant?”
“Yes” Jess snapped angrily, “pregnant”
Despite the other emotions he was feeling, the thought of a baby with Jess…it
made him tingle all over.
“Wow” he murmered, smiling slightly at Jess, “that’s amazing, Jess”
Jess stared icily at him.
“Was, Charlie, WAS amazing”, Jess turned away, “I’m not going to have it”
Charlie became extremely distressed.
“Why!” he cried, a lump lodging itself in his throat, tears sprung to his eyes at the
thought of his unborn child.
“Because of you” Jess replied coldly, “See you around Charlie, have a nice life”
And with that, Jess rose from the bench and climbed into a waiting taxi cab.
“Charlie, Charlie, can I have a photo please?!”
“Me next Charlie, can you sign this?”
“Charlie, Charlie!”
Charlie sighed but kept the smile plastered on his face.
“Slow down, girls, don’t crush him” came the voice of their minder.
This wasn’t what he needed right now. He hadn’t spoken to Jess in nearly four
weeks. The house phone always went straight to the answering machine, and her
mobile had been cancelled.
Charlie didn’t blame her for ignoring him, she reacted better than he would of. But
he was still heartbroken that she would never answer. He knew she had heard the
countless messages he left. Pleading messages, although he knew that after a
month Jess would have had the abortion carried out. It still ached inside knowing
that his child was no more. And he couldn’t even begin to imagine how Jess was
feeling.
“Places, people, places”
This was there second video shoot. Charlie stood on the stage, trying his best to
ignore the grins of the fans trying to get eye contact. He licked his lips thoughtfully
and stared into space. Wanting to be anywhere but here.
“Charlie” he heard someone say in a hushed voice. He looked about him.
“Charlie!” Matt called a bit louder. Charlie stared gawmlessly at him.
“You totally fucking missed your part, mate” he frowned.
“Oh…sorry”
Matt glanced at James who shrugged and went back to pinging on his guitar.
Somehow, Charlie made it to the end of the shoot.
Ideally, he could skulk off stage without being caught by bouncing, giggling girls.
But no such luck, the minute the filming ended, girls climbed up onto the stage and
surrounded him.
“Charlie… I love you” announced a girl no older than 16.
“No you don’t babe”
“I do, I do! I wanna have your babies!” she cried, sobbing shamelessly.
At least somebody does, he thought regretfully, if only I could make Jess see how
heartbroken I am.
* * *
Jess looked around her at the happy couples. It felt like every since she had been
without Charlie there was constant reminders of him.
The couple opposite her kissing made her feel nauseous, the teenage boy with the
spiky hair made her ache with longing, and the girl reading SNEAK magazine with
Charlie’s face on the front brought tears to her eyes. Jess looked about the train
carriage as it rocked from side to side. She couldn’t face being at her and Charlie’s
house alone after she came back from France, so she had been staying with her
parents. And now, after arriving back home, Jess wanted to turn and run back to her
parents again. She was dreading getting all of the missed messages on the
answering machine. When she came home, she had thrown away her mobile out of
anger, Jess gazed up at the advertisement posters above her. “TREAT YOUR MAN
THIS VALENTINES”….. “LOVE IS…TELLING THEM THAT YOU LOVE
THEM”….. “AMAZING NEW ALBUM FROM BUSTED -OUT NOW!”
Jess abruptly stood up and waited for the doors to open at her stop. I can’t go on
like this, she thought. She was going to try and forgive Charlie if it killed her.
Taking out her new mobile, she dialled his number.
* * *
Charlie had an idea.
“Paul” he called to his minder, “do me a favour, mate?”
“What?” Paul asked, not taking his eyes off of the excited girls swamped around
their favourite band member, hands darting in all directions.
“Go to the nearest phone shop and by an identical phone to mine, ok?”
Paul looked confused
Charlie threw Paul his phone and raised his eyebrows apologetically.
“Please” he mouthed, knitting his eyebrows together and holding his hands in a
praying gesture.
Paul obeyed and left the studio, as he was halfway down the busy lunchtime high
street, the phone inside his pocket began to ring.
Without looking at the callers identity, he pressed “Cancel” and switched off the
phone. Spotting a Phones4u store, Paul replaced the phone in his pocket, and went
inside.
“Sorry -the person you are calling is unavailable, please try again later”
Jess frowned and slipped the phone back into her Burberry handbag -a present
from Charlie. He had let his phone ring before cutting her off, he obviously
assumed the status of their relationship as what she had confirmed in France -over.
She sniffled sadly and searched for a tissue in her pocket, thinking of all the good
times.
She thought of the Valentines day when they were seventeen that Charlie had
climbed the tree outside her bedroom window with a rose in his mouth. Jess had
only realised he was there when he cut his lip on the thorn and had been mumbling
swear words to himself.
Jess even thought back to times they had had not so long ago. The night he found
out about “the” gig and had read her mind and told her nothing would ever keep
him from her. She realised that that was inevitable, Charlie may have promised
that, but in the business he was in he couldn’t keep promises, he hadn’t so far, and
ever since Charlie had been enjoying his fame all he had been able to do was make
and break promises.
To her surprise, snow began to fall all around her, and within minutes, had coated
the floor. It was like a winter wonderland. Jess shook her head, and ran back to the
train station, back to her parents house.
Charlie gazed out of the window at the snow. I wonder what Jess is doing now, he
wondered with longing, I wonder if she’s missing me.
He had decided to go home to his parents house after the shoot. Sitting on his bed
in his old room he began wrapping the mobile phone he had brought today for Jess.
Charlie intended on sending her pictures on it when she received it, because if his
voice couldn’t convince her he was sorry and needed her, hopefully a photo of how
run-down and heartbroken he was without her would.
Charlie moved over to the window again and looked out. The evening sky had
darkened more due to the snow. He smiled at the memory of being 15 out in the
front garden with Jess, the first Christmas it had snowed in Redbridge. They had
been overjoyed and spent all afternoon building a snow man, which resulted in a
snow fight, which had resulted in their first kiss.
Charlie could see the light from the living room downstairs reflecting on the snow
covered grass below. His Mum was bustling about in the kitchen making a roast
dinner, his favourite, and his father and brothers were sitting at the dinner table
whilst watching the rugby.
Squinting, Charlie could make our the silhouette of a girl walking along the quiet
lane, wrapped in a white jacket, brunette hair setting off her striking features…..
“Jess!” Charlie cried, jumping off the chair, letting his mobile drop to the floor. He
sped down the stairs two at a time and suddenly realised he had spent most of the
last few months chasing her everywhere.
“Jess, JESS!”
Jess looked up, stunned to hear a voice. Her inner emotions clumped together in a
tearful mixture as there in front of her stood the reason she had been so
unbelievably happy, but so heartbreakingly unhappy in the past few months.
Watching Charlie dart warily towards her now was like an emotional roller coaster.
As he reached her, looking so genuinely sorry and anxious, Jess followed her first
instinct.
“Argh, I guess I deserved that” he muttered sadly, holding the place on his smooth
cheekbone where her hand had touched. Jess then followed her second instinct.
She fell forwards onto Charlie and released a batch of tears that had been
desperately trying to get out since he had screamed her about his t-shirt the day of
the gig, since he had told her she couldn’t come to Paris, since she had caught him
with another girl, and since she just hadn’t been with him. Jess mourned for the
days when she didn’t have to rely on phones or radio stations or the bands website
to find out where Charlie was.
Charlie felt choked. Tears welling in his eyes as he held Jess close and breathed in
her familiar scent. Tears began to stream down his face. Relief engulfed him as all
he ever wanted was right in front of him. Charlie couldn’t believe it had taken him
this long to realise how much he truly needed Jess.
“Jess” he whispered through tears, “I need you..I just love you so so much”
Charlie’s husky voice so close to her made Jess tingle and it felt like every inch of
her forgave him
“And, Jess about Asha…I was drunk, honestly, I was barely conscious I swear, Jess
I swear on my life” Charlie’s sobbing turned drastically into full on crying, he leant
his head onto Jess’s shoulder pleadingly.
As with Jess, the emotions from the months gone by that had been building up
released themselves. The confusion..the pressure…the fame…the drugs…waking
up and forgetting where you were.
Jess held his head comfortingly, smiling through her tears with relief as she
realised that her and Charlie would be okay -for a while.
Charlie and Jess spent the entire night together in his old room. And it felt just like
old times. Jess was glowing with happiness at the prospect at being held by Charlie
through the night. Charlie, for the first time in months, felt truly relaxed, and felt as
though his ride on the manic emotional roller coaster each day had finished. He
had come to notice that his body had been constantly tense…and that he had only
felt it truly relax when Jess had told him that she forgave him.
They had stood by Charlie’s bedroom window in the darkness, the only light
coming through was the moonlight. Once again he discovered the connection he
and Jess had previously had.
The next morning wasn’t followed by goodbyes or hurt. Jess and Charlie packed
their things into his car and drove the short drive south back to their house.
To their surprise, a group of girls were clumped together on the wall in front of the
house. Charlie sighed and steered into the driveway, it wasn’t that he minded the
fans, but he felt as though his relationship with Jess was still on thin ice, and didn’t
want something interfering again.
Jess smiled supportively and squeezed his arm.
“Its ok baby..go and talk to them, I’ll go and them so coffee…they look frozen”
Charlie’s expression changed.
“Jess…you don’t have to”
“Charlie” she insisted, placing a finger over his mouth, “they’ve come all the way
to see you”
The girls outside the house all giggled excitedly when Charlie approached. They
were quite unsure of Jess.
“I thought they split up” said one girl in hushed tones to her distressed friend.
“That’s what “Closer” said!”
One girl, a small brunette, plucked up the courage to ask what they were all
thinking.
“Charlie” she said in embarrassed sing-song tones, “is that your girlfriend?”
Charlie smiled and nodded.
“Yeah, that’s Jess, she’s cool -you’ll like her”
As of on cue, Jess came out of the house with a tray, on the tray was six cups of
coffee for each fan, they looked astonished.
“Here you go girls” she said, smiling brightly, “a little something to warm you up”
The girls took the cups appreciatively, shooting shocked glances at each other, and
warm smiles at Jess. Was this the same Jess they remembered from the first video
shoot? The girl leaning against the trailer like she was Gods gift? Giving everyone
the evil eye.
“So” she asked, casually sitting on the wall beside them, “where have you girls
come from?”. Jess looked at them with what she hoped seemed a genuine
expression.
“I’m from Newcastle, and so is Molly, but Amber, Sarah and Beth are from
London” explained a girl with cropped, choppy blonde hair, smiling
enthusiastically at Jess, and then Charlie. Jess quickly glanced at Charlie, he
looked grateful that she was making the effort, his lips were slightly curved
upwards in a smile, which helped keep the attention from being overwhelming for
him.
Twenty minutes later, satisfied with their photos and autographs, the girls let off
down the road, jumping up and down with excitement. Charlie watched them go
and put a loving arm around Jess’s shoulders.
“Thanks for that, Jess -thought you do realise there will probably be twice as many
here tomorrow now they all know your running Jess and Charlies café” he added
with a laugh.
Jess giggled.
“Its alright” she assured him, as they traipsed back to the front door, making deep
footprints in the snow, “I can handle it, I think”
Charlie kissed her head, smiling.
Charlie and Jess spent his time off at home. Deciding against leaving the country,
they spent every waking minute together, talking about everything but Busted, and
it suited Jess just fine. It wasn’t that she wasn’t proud of him, for being eighteen
and achieving this much already was a big accomplishment. But Charlie wasn’t
Charlie from Busted to her, he was Charlie Simpson, period.
“I’m feeling so relaxed, baby” Charlie mumbled huskily as he leaned back against
Jess on the sun lounger and shut his eyes.
The snow had cleared up amazingly and within two weeks the sun was shining,
Charlie and Jess spent the last of his days off in the garden, tanning. Jess massaged
his shoulders lovingly as he lolled against her.
He reached a hand down and squeezed her thigh affectionately.
“I never want to lose you, Jess” Charlie murmered, without opening his eyes.
Jess smiled, this was exactly what she wanted to hear.
“You won’t” she promised, as she eased herself up from behind him, “but there is
something I have to tell you” she added, seriously.
Charlie turned with an adorable look of confusion creasing his features.
“What’s wrong?”
Jess sat down on the sun lounger which has initially been Charlie’s until he had
joined her on hers. She adjusted her Burberry bikini and pushed her sunglasses
onto her head.
“Charlie..I…I’m..pregnant” Jess stumbled. She wasn’t sure whether to be nervous
telling him or not. Months before in Paris, France he had been overjoyed, but
things might have changed.
And is it turned out, Charlie was ecstatic. A little nervous about parenthood, but
otherwise looking forward to it.
“BUSTED!” clap clap clap, “BUSTED” clap clap clap.
Jess stood on the sidelines in a tight yellow vest top and jeans, watching proudly.
Today was a full day of signing for Charlie, Matt and James.
She could see Charlie looked about trying to spot her, and an adorable smile broke
across his face when his gaze landed on her. Glancing about quickly, he blew her a
small kiss, which caught the attention of jealous fans. Jess blushed slightly,
although Charlie’s gesture was sweet, she had wanted to keep as low a profile as
possible.
A group of fourteen year olds bounced past having just had their moment with
Busted.
“Ohhh, Marie did you SEE the way Charlie looked at you?! He SO fancies you!”
“Yeah!” all the friends cried in unison.
Jess smiled slightly. She had learnt to deal with this kind of thing, she loved
Charlie, and more importantly he loved her.
After about two hours, the signing was still going on. Their manager leant down
and whispered something into Charlie’s ear, and he nodded slightly.
“Right, guys” came the voice of the man in charge of minding the signing,
“Charlie, Matt and James have kindly agreed to stay longer to make sure more
stuff is signed”
Screams erupted from the crowd of girls still waiting excitedly in the line.
Jess watched Charlie closely. Clearly, he was getting irritable, but he kept on
smiling and kissing and hugging.
Months had gone by with the work load high. Jess was now nearly 5 months
pregnant, although the bump was not evident. It was supposed to be a complete
secret, but Charlie had explained about the London Girls.
The London Girls were a group of 5 girls who know where Busted were all the
time. Charlie was their favourite, and they were well aware of Jess. They had taken
to her and were sweet in a crazy fan type way. Charlie had explained that they had
guessed about them expecting a baby. He had been speaking to his Mum on the
phone outside the studios and they had heard him say “Well, her morning sickness
isn’t that bad now” and had badgered him into confessing. Charlie had, eventually,
making them promise to keep it to themselves. Suprisingly, they had.
“Charlie, Charlie -I brought you this” cried a girl of about 15, waving a necklace
around in the air, “my parents won’t know!”
Charlie’s mouth dropped open, as used to he was getting to the adoration, it still
threw him when girls gave him presents they shouldn’t be.
“Sweetheart you keep that ok?” he said softly, smiling gratefully.
“B-but its for you” stuttered the girl, clearly upset.
“You can’t give me something you parents bought for you, mate” Charlie began to
look distressed.
“Come on, move along, a lot of girls want some time with the boys” came the loud,
foghorn voice of the big, burly security guard, as he moved the crying girl away
from the table.
Jess was stunned, it was odd to see how girls threw themselves at Charlie’s feet.
She watched the girl being carried away by friends and security guards. Tears
streamed down her red wide eyed face.
“Charlie, I LOVE YOUUUUU” she was screaming, kicking furiously at her
capturers.
Charlie began to rub his eyes tiredly in between signings. Jess watched him
sympathetically. It wasn’t just Charlie being lazy, dark circles sat beneath the
drooping, unshining eyes on Matt and James exhausted, washed-out faces also.
Charlie’s abrupt sneeze shook Jess out of her thoughts. A thin film of sweat
covered his forehead and upper lip.
While the security selected four more fans to go to the table, Charlie rested his
head on it. The blue painted wood was surprisingly cool against his face even in
the hot afternoon sun.
“Charlie are you ok?” asked Paul, leaning down next to Charlie’s head.
“Mmpphhh no” came the muffled voice of Charlie. He began to tremble, his hands
desperately trying to grip the table in a bid to steady himself.
Paul waved a “time-out” hand to the security guard and he instantly put a long,
muscely arm in front of the approaching girls, who were watching Charlie in
curious horror.
Jess tried to climb onto the stage, but Paul shook his head, then turned to their
make-up artist.
“Annie -take Jess to the car”
Annie obeyed and signalled for Jess to follow her. With a last glance back at
Charlie, she walked down to the blacked out, air-conditioned car.
“Come on, mate” groaned Paul. He pulled Charlie off of the table. Charlie’s eyes
were drooping and distant, his mouth was open.
“I wunmtt go homm”
“We’re taking ya home, mate, don’t worry” said Matt, pulling one of Charlie’s
arms around his shoulder. Paul took the other and together they helped Charlie to
the car.
Jess was already waiting inside on the backseat, a pillow ready on her lap for
Charlie to rest. When he got in Jess turned into Mother-mode.
“Take that blazer off, babe, you need to cool down”
“Mmm” Charlie mumbled, barely aware of what she had said. Jess assisted him in
removing his blazer and sweatshirt, which no doubt had helped him over heat.
Having done that, Charlie laid down to rest on Jess’s lap.
She ran her fingers comfortingly through his blonde and brown streaked spiky hair.
He moaned his approval and squeezed her thigh with his weak fingers.
The signing ended then. Matt and James weren’t feeling their best either and were
slumped in the seats in front of Jess and Charlie, waiting to be taken home. The
car, which was usually alive with the sound of three teenage boys living a dream,
was so quiet and calm the silence could have been cut with a knife.
James placed his rucksack against the window and after having two painkillers for
his sore head, he closed his eyes and dreamt of home. Matt leant his face against
the cool glass and also closed his eyes, and realised the last year had gone by so
fast he had hardy any recollection of it. He pulled at a loose thread on his jeans and
sat silently. Charlie remained half asleep on Jess’s lap.
In all of their dreams, they never imagined this would be where they were almost a
year later. And with a final squeeze of Jess’s thigh, Charlie drifted into a deep
sleep, and dreamt of his new life as a rock star.
THE
END