Humoral Immunity Skit Ma-Gi-Ka-Ru Version
Braden K – Memory B Cell
Lizzie K – Plasma B Cell
Alex S – Helper T Cell
Stefanie K – Narrator/Cloned Helper T Cell
Jackie Y - Antigen
James W - ???
Wes C – B Cell
Clara S - Macrophage
Music: Prologue F – cut off at 31 seconds
Narrator: Once upon a time, in the magical world of immunology existed Muggle cells, who
without a care, performed daily activities that helped the body function normally. But in this world
existed a great evil – an entity known as ‘The particle-that-must-not-be-named’. Its real name was
Anti Gen. Detested by everyone, TPTMNBN struck fear into the nucleus of many cells, baiting for
an opportunity to latch onto some poor, unsuspecting individual and ruin their lives forever. And
just as TPTMNBN was about to strike again, a brave group of cells rise up against the reign of
terror…
Music: The Master – cut off at 15 seconds
Anti Gen: Curses! It seems I need a host cell to multiply and create an army of Cell-Eaters to take
over this pathetic world! Well that’s no problem… I’ll just take over this Muggle Cell here!
Muggle Cell: AHHHH! (scream/run)
Anti Gen: (Evil laugh)
--Elsewhere--
Pacro Mage (Macrophage): I can’t stand this! I hate living in fear of the Anti Gen!
Magical Helper T!: NO, Pacro Mage! Don’t say its real name! What if it triggers an infection to
occur? What’ll we do?!
Music: Madder Sky – cut off at 1:15-ish?
Pacro Mage: We’ll fight it obviously. I’m tired of seeing the Muggle cells being ravaged by Anti
Gen! It’s our duty as graduates of the one and only Humowarts Academy to fight the Anti Gen!
Magical Helper T!: But, Pacro Mage, there are so many of the Cell Eaters! What will we do?
Pacro Mage: I’ll get the Anti Gen ready for you, so you just be ready to help me out! Call out
Barry Lymphotter, too – he’s the Particle That Lived! He’ll want to help us get rid of the Anti Gen,
too! After all, his parent cells died in a battle against the Anti Gen!
Magical Helper T!: OK, Pacro Mage! Good luck!
--Where Barry Lymphotter is—
Magical Helper T!: Barry! Barry Lymphotter!
Barry Lymphotter (B cell): What do you want? Can’t you see I’m too busy emoing over my parents’
deaths?
Magical Helper T!: But Barry, don’t you want to avenge your parents’ deaths?
Barry: No. It’s difficult enough being the Particle That Lived! Everyone treats me differently
because I’m the ‘chosen one’ that’ll create the legendary plasma and memory cells! Just leave me
alone, OK? I don’t –
Magical Helper T!: Don’t be silly. You know you’re loving the attention, you adorable emo cell!
Now we have to hurry and help Pacro Mage defeat the Anti Gen!
Barry: I said no! Why would I want to go against the thing that killed my parents?!
Magical Helper T!: Come on, Barry! Don’t you want revenge? Don’t you have motivation to help
protect the Muggle cells? Your parents died protecting them – don’t you want to continue their
noble deed?!
Barry: … You’re right. I’m tired of running away. I’ll face the Anti Gen once and for all! Let’s go
Magical Helper T!
--Two joins Pacro Mage—
Music: Iljimae 01 – 1:08 – to end
Pacro Mage: Alright Anti Gen, face our wrath! Phagocytalliarmus! (wave wand/throw blanket)
Anti Gen: What the?! Ah! What is this creature? It’s… it’s engulfing me and ripping me apart?! How
can this be?!
Barry: That’s the spell Pacro Mage was famous for! It summons macrophages that’ll phagocytize,
and degrade you into your peptide components!
Magical Helper T:! And not only that, Phagocytalliarmus will also hold you in place with a class II
MHC binding spell!
Anti Gen: Impossible! I’m getting degraded into peptides by a white blob?! And this MHC binder!
I can’t move!
Narrator: Pacro Mage has summoned the ‘macrophage’ – the mythical creature said to be able to
engulf, degrade the almighty Anti Gen and present it on class II MHC binders to create the
rumored Ag-MHC complex! But it’s not over yet! The Anti Gen is still alive! What will the magical
trio do?!
Pacro Mage: Hurry, Magical Helper T! It’s your turn! Use your receptor spells!
Magical Helper T!: Which one?
Barry: The one specific to the Anti Gen, stupid!
Magical Helper T!: (shuffles through book) Oh… oh… I got it! This’ll let me bind to the Ag-MHC
complex! Get ready, Pacro Mage!
Pacro Mage: OK! (waits until MHT! Binds to AG) Interleukin onetrificus! Undergo clonal expansion,
Magical Helper T!
Anti Gen: No! I’m not finished yet! Go Cell Eaters!
(Cell Eater approaches Barry)
Barry: Not so fast! I’ve got this spell to make sure I attach to you!
Cell Eater: Wait! This isn’t supposed to happen! I’m supposed to attach to you and kill you, Barry
Lymphotter! Lord Anti Gen! The plan has failed! What do I –
Barry: Your reign of terror ends here, Anti Gen and Cell Eaters! (degrade the stuff)
Narrator: Unbelievable! Barry has finally escaped his past and is now fighting to save the Muggle
cells! He has just attached to the Cell Eater using his specific receptor and has degraded the Cell
Eater and presented it with another Class II MHC binding spell! He really is the Particle That Lived!
Magical Helper T!’s: Now it’s all my turn! Here I go, Anti Gen! Be prepared! (sticks to Ag-MHC on
Barry) Interleukin twotrificus! Go Barry! Make your parents proud!
Barry: The legendary plasma and memory cells… I’ll create it as I undergo clonal expansion…! I’ll
avenge my parents!
(Bunch of Barry’s yay)
Plasma Barry: I won’t forgive you for your evil deeds, Anti Gen! Now prepare to die!
Antibodifiction! This spell will produce antibodies that’ll bind to you and form the Ag-Abs
complex! There’s no way to escape now, Anti Gen!
Anti Gen: No! This can’t be happening! After I’ve waited so long to finally succeed…! Argh! Barry
Lymphotter! Because of you, I’m being destroyed once again! Curse you, Particle That Lived! I will
be back again!
Memory Barry: And when that happens, I’ll be ready for you! I’ll remember you Anti Gen! Next
time, you won’t even have a chance to look at the Muggle cells! Your reign ends here!
*throw sheet*
Anti Gen: T__T NOOOOO! (dies)
BB – cut off at 30 seconds
Pacro Mage/Magical Helper T!/Barry: I can’t believe it! We won!
Barry: Thanks guys, you guys really helped me believe in myself. I’ll continue fighting the Anti Gen
just like my parents did.
PM/MHT: You’re welcome, Barry. Now let’s get outta here.
Narrator: And so our heroes depart. The plasma cells, having produced the antibodies to combat
the Anti Gen, defeat the current infection. However, in case of future invasions, the memory B
cells stand by, always waiting…