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Forthcoming Gigs gIGList Please phone to confirm, check website for updates ok May 18th Edinburgh Bongo Club 01315 565204 19th Glasgow Nice ‘n’ Sleazy 26th Kings Lynn Foster Sports and Social Club Clenchwarton June 9th Nottingham The Maze 0115 9475650 16th Leicester The Shed 0116 2622255 17th Kettering Rising Sun 01536 483774 23rd Margate The Lido-Kent Sovereigns Scooter Rally 29th Derbyshire Run to the Shires Scooter Rally July 6th Ashton -Under-Lyme Witchwood 7th OldhamThe Castle 12th Nottingham The Old Vic 13th Bristol The Black Swan withThe Tonics and Purple Peach DJs 19th Camden - The Verge supporting Capdown BOOK NOW!...BOOK NOW!...BOOK NOW!...BOOK NOW!... Space is limited. We’re taking a luxury double-decker coach to Bristol on July 13th. £10 for the coach then you get a voucher for £5 entry to the gig. Pick-ups from Leicester, Hinckley, Nuneaton and Birmingham. Leaving Leicester 4pm, leaving Bristol 4am! Phone Ross to book 07789 796706 or collar one of the band. How the eel are ya? This month it’s yer diaboli- cal-liberties- taking BLO special issue in which no one is safe from critical analysis.After last Great yorky pud tips month’s 2 page centre spread diatribe exposing Thanks to Will, a Yorkshire pudding and toad-in-the-hole guru from the dire tribe that is the Thplitterth is we have a Leicester for these failsafe tips. very small article extolling the weell hidden 1. Always ensure your eggs are fresh! (vegans can virtues of the aforementioned musicians (using use egg substitute) the term loosely). Not to mention eel nonsense. 2. Beat yourself off into a sticky mess then gradually You must have noticed that everything is some- add a little liquid (a bit at a time - don’t rush it) how related to eels. Chars. See you in Ely or 3. Make sure the oven is really hot before you bang it Ealing. Dedicated to Graham Eel of the in there. Editor: Steenie McRelieve Meellfield Massive Eel Appreciation Society. 4. Once your batter has reached its climactic height turn down the heat just to keep it up there. Bookings, Info contact Ross on 07889 796706 5. Gobble it up! eel-mail: email@example.com website: www.splitters.co.uk Press Office eelmail: firstname.lastname@example.org Postal address: Blue Line Order, 22 Halifax Drive LEICESTER, LE4 2GT. BE A CULT NEWS...NEWS...NEWS...NEWS...NEWS...NEWS...NEWS...NEWS SPUNGE IN NO GIG SHOCKER...SPUNGE IN NO GIG Y ou could become a bit of a cult figure by creating a saying that catches on. eg. “we are becoming your sys- tems” or “Eels are not edible”. Believe it or not we, at the Have they split up or what? Everyone knows Spunge do a Blue Line Order, know how this can be accomplished and gig 365 days of the year so what was the bass player doing we’re spilling the cat out of the bag here and now and also at our gig in Worcester with Four Foot Fingers on a revealing the secret of how it’s done. And eating the beans off saturday? (see review later) the floor. You can eat off that floor, the cat does, when it’s not in a bag. PURPLE PEACH...PURPLE PEACH...PURPLE PEACH... Yeah we’re doing some gigs with Purple Peach.ska DJS. One You will require the services of two foreigners with a limited at the Black Swan in Bristol St Pauls and one at Camden command of english. The limiteder the better. Select a short Underworld. We’re taking a double-decker to Bristol, if you sentence at random and ask the first foreigner to translate the want to go see back page for details. . See contacts page for sentence into a tape player. Purple Peach. TO STAY ON THE LIST OR NOT TO STAY ON THE LIST? Then play the tape back to the second foreigner for them to translate back into English creating the *saying* The Chinese The mailing list is becoming a bit of a handful so to make sure whispers effect may have evolved the sentence into an attrac- it only goes to people who want it, we’re giving you a reply tive phrase. Testing is of course required to ascertain whether card. If you send it back you get £2 off the price of the new this is in fact the case. album ok. health and nutrition with the Thplitterth WELLINGBOROUGH...WELLINGBOROUGH...WEELLINGB 500 groovers packed into the Thunderbird Rock ‘n’ Roll Thanks to Steve Cracknell of Leicester for This month’s recipe. school dinner hall in Wellingborough for a skin-tastic night of Sosmix shits are an excellent centre piece around which to base a two-tone. Splitters were followed by the boisterous Ska man sunday dinner. doing baldy, bouncy covers in boots and braces. Then im- pressionists More Specials. One confused skinhead re- Ingredients to serve two (for 4 people just double everything) quested Baggy Trousers. Lady-legs Braidley (vocals) claimed - Half a pack of Jusrol puff pastry. to have sustained “second-rate burns” from a rogue hot dog - Enough sosmix to fill 2 sausage rolls each 30cm long. (Sosmix onion. You know how they dangle down and stick to your chin? available from wholefood shops and some supermarkets) You could Ooh Ouch! Stingy! use sausage meat. - Plastic flies - available at joke shops. WORCESTERR...WORCESTERR...WORCESTERR...WO Instructions Splitterrs linked up with Four Foot Fingerrs at Johnny - Defrost the Jusrol puff pastry and cut into 2. Marr’s Marr’s Barr just down the rroad from the Snickerrs - Mix up the sosmix as if making burgers or sausages. Arms. A good music pub this, run by a musician and housing - Roll out the pastry into a sheet 30cm by 10cm and 2mm thick. a well equipped recording studio and a sprung dance floorr - Make a 30cm snake of Sosmix and place it down the edge of because the building used to be a ballet studio. Did you know the pastry. that? I don’t think you did goodbye. Soon to undergo altera- - Roll it up to make a 30cm sausage roll. tions to the ceiling to improve acoustics. Betterr and betterr. - Repeat with the other bit of pastry. - Now coil it up like a walnut whip shaped shit. US style ska punk - Bake in a pre-heated oven at 220 degrees for about 15mins or until golden. Wannabe Americans Four Foot Fingers’ singer came - Garnish the shits with the plastic flies and serve while still hot straight from his job at Wal-Mart to the gig, still in his work and steaming. shirt, pausing only to clip on the ubiquitous wallet chain before fearlessly punking up the atmosphere, heckling the defence- Enjoy your delicious Sosmix shits! less audience ruthelessly. The mixing desk whimpered in terror as the one-man-riot pummelled the hapless kit. Variations: Spice up the Sosmix with herbs, pepper, crushed garlic and chilli powder or make a long, wiggly sosmix eel. Keep sending ‘em in! NICKNAMES UPDATE Dr G (guitar) - Crighton Jay (bass) - Piglet EEL BANDS The Eels Eely Dan The Beateels contacts BANDS>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> SKANt Real young bunch. Precocius talent isn’t it. Jazzy ska pop punk wiv kewl horns www.SKANKt.com. email: email@example.com. Tel. 01242 704764. Ross (manager) - Arkwright Caesor Soze - ska/punk from Japan firstname.lastname@example.org. Big up Tokyo massive!! Braidley (vocals) - Lady-legs Eelectric Eel Orchestra Travis Cut - Melodic punk from Leicester - email@example.com Fez (drums) - Splash, Fizz, Fierre. Mareellion Schkmph - funk, ska, African styles from Leicester. eelmail: firstname.lastname@example.org Eel Eye Span Drugsquad - skunk for your ears- have a new CD out now. Dave, 8 Glebelands, Drew(vocals) -Guus Meeuwis Headington Oxford OX3 7EEL. Teel. 01865 763493. (Pronounced Hoos Merris) The Feel The Skalinskis great vodka swilling ska with hot trumpet want bookings, supports etc. Phone Laureel Aitken Dean or Jackie 01782 624693 Pigfish - punk/ska - The Reverend James album £7. Mark Sampson, 78 Alcester Rd. Eel ‘Scratch’ Perry Birmingham B13 8BB. Tel Tony 01543 304549. EEL MEET AGAIN.... Peters and Eel Belinda Carbuncle spiky oi! type comedy punk 45 Claremont Place, Canterbury, Kent tel.01273 233091 www.belindacarbuncle.com What is the favoured estuary of eels? Seal Martin. Diverse punk, ska, with brass (esp. trombone). Hide Inside The Cabbage CD The Moray Firth Manic eel Preachers £1.50 also 3 more CDs including new 17 track album Broken Binding. www.martinthepunkband.8k.com Dalziel and Pascoe SKA VENUES AND CLUB NIGHTS>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> What instrument do eels play? Starsky and Eel Purple Peach hold their well respected Ska City monthly club night at Decades, 45 Bartolomew St, Digbeth, Birmingham B5 featuring DJs Jay Dorfman, Si Lane and Tipper + guest DJ playing The Congers Skeelinskis ska, rocksteady, reggae, 2 tone, nu stuff & Northern Soul. 8-3am £2 £3after10.30. Phone 0121 Sex Pisteels 6930293 or 07747 186376 or eelmail email@example.com Why didn’t the eel have any pelvic Mark Wyeth’s bi-monthly ska stomp-down at The Rayners Hotel 2 mins walk from Boney Eel Rayner’s Lane tube. Owen Gray to record a live album there on June 2nd. Derrick fins? Morgan on 23rd June. Phone pub for lowdown or eelmail firstname.lastname@example.org Because eels don’t have them. Rebeelation Sublime at The Underworld, Camden on wednesdays. Ska/punk DJs doors 11pm. Phone 0207 Speelitters 482 1932. Benny Eel SKA RADIO SHOWS>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> A man took his eel to the vets coz Hardcore Street Sounds in Meelton Keynes Sunday 8-10pm on CMRK 89.8FM. it was Jimmy Saveelle (DJ) Contact Anna Maria HSS,CRMK, 14 Vincent Ave, Meelton Keynes MK8 0AB Smoke Like an Eel SpyTime Italian internet radio show http://www.listen.to/spytime floating on the top of the tank. The Ska-line radio show, Dublin. Monday 8.30-10.00pm on NEAR FM. Contact the show vet diagnosed death as the cause. Cypress Eel through Ska-Line (below) “Well can’t you do anything?” the Beelly SKA Zines>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Pulped, George Marshall’s broadsheet ska newspaper. PO box 12 man asked. The Bee Geels Lockerbieel DG11 3BW, SCOTLAND (£10 for 6 issues or free with pages missing) “Well, if you insist” said the vet Meteellica ska, punk, Oi!. Offering discount CDs to subscribers and free compilation CDs! leaving the room, coming back Mad not Mad zine are ya mad or not? Big E Taylor 4 Mountmores Close, Over Hulton, Bolton, The Average Eel Band Manchester 1BL51HT. with a labrador which sniffed all Ska Face zine 50p 42 Cranmere Road, Melton Mowbray, Leics LE13 1TB. http// GG Eellin over the eel. Then a cat which also members.netscapeonline.co.uk/markskapunk sniffed the eel. “That’s £400 de- Discharge (electrical) Do The Dog zine. An encyclopaedia of the current world ska scene. Respect the Berkshire The wombeels massive. 26a Craven Road Newbury, Berks £5 for 4 issues. Also does compilation CDs manded the vet. “What? Just for sometimes. Worth a pester. telling me my eel is dead?” cried Bounty Keeller Ska patrol zine, Ska Line 4 Swan’s Nest Ave, Kilbarrack, Dublin 5, Eeland. Toots and the Mayteels Time Longer Than Rope zine (£2.50inc) sounds of JA ‘60s and ‘70s for collectors 103 Gaskell the man. “It would have been £5 Way, Lynn, Norfolk PE30 3SG. but with the lab test and the cat Etheel Merman The Origineel Sin a monthly zine that only writes about small and unsigned bands scan.....” of eel styles. C/O Didier Becu, Jozef Guislainstraat 6, 9000 Gent, Belgium. Price 36BF stamp or 1 IRC or $1. Report: Belgium, Holland. What was the best gig on the tour? Cafe Welfaard in Den Bosch in Holland. After hitting the coffee shop for errr If you pay tax ,or even just VAT, some of your money is going into the coffee we drank free beer then played to a packed bar of tall trustafarians and New Deel for Music scheme. Some of us can remember when the bohemian types. Bit like Gaz’s Rocking Blues but with space. Macc Ladds did an album on the Young Enterprise Scheme (or something.) Laminator are a product of the universal and wholly What was the tour catchphrase? six more beers! The natives soon picked that up and shouted it back at justified culture of use of this scheme to produce subversive material. us. It’s more fun than the usual Raw Deal slave labour gulag salt mine routine. Then again salt mines are great if you like salt. A cross be- Who were the most interesting/unusual characters you met? Certainly the Portugese were the most unusually interesting and challenging tween the Dwarves and the legendary G.G. Allin (RIP). keep yer eels people we met. “want to try something new?”, “If you are sick I can help.” peeled for an interview with these sickos. http://uk.geocities.com/ vilegenerationuk/LAMINATOR.html What are the 3 best things about Belgium? Beer, beer and beer, oh yeah and our friends in St Denijs. Sante! Back to the days of Space Dust, Jamie and the Magic Torch, The Red What are the 3 best things about Holland? Hand Gang, Sherbet Dib-Dabs... http://tv.cream.org Ganja, asking the police the way to the coffee shop (in Utrecht), Queen’s day in Amsterdam when the police sell seized cannabis in aid of childrens’ charities. “It Double entendres www.dickshouse.com wouldn’t ‘appen ‘ere...” Big gay bears www.eurobear.com What’s it like gigging back in the UK? No food, No free beer, great audiences and good to be back home. Did the band make any progress as a result of the tour? Yeah, Pierre, who booked the Holland gigs wants to book more gigs in Holland NEXT MONTH..... and maybe release our new album in Holland. How did you get the tour? Yeah! bands sometimes ask us how they can get gigs. Someone just Reviews of the Belgium and Holland gigs hopefully from our asks us to do it. When you do a few gigs you get more if people see you Belgue correspondent Ingrid Bakaert. and like it. Tony from Rebelation put us in contact with Barney in Belgium after they played there. Word of mouth innit? Be nice to everyone you Foreign language skills workshop with our cosmopolitan meet they might be a promoter or worse. drummer Nick ‘itchy’ McFerran (drums) What was the worst thing about the tour? Nose picking techniques including bogey disposal Toilets with a shelf or ‘stool plinth’. It’s in the room with you. Brrrr. Not exactly the most prolific of bands, why don’t you release more Drinking games from continental Europe recordings? How many do you folking want? We’re always gigging. the songs just come. If we try to force it we make rubbish songs. CD album International Smuggeelrs...............£10+£1 p+p Splitters second album Crop top t-shirt...............................................£6 inc. International Smugglers Unisex Skinny -ribs T-shirt........................... £6 inc. £10 Polo shirts with embroidered logo.................£10inc. T-shirts ................................................(s,m,l,xl) £8inc. New album cover design full colour Rock or Riot album cover full colour Trojan Records style Mohawk design in black Small logo black T Blue Line Order Records logo Black/white (XL only) Hooded sweatshirts.........................................£20 + £1p+p Rock or Riot mug (last one) ............................£5 inc. T-shirt also in black, all Zip-up feelce tops ..............in black (m or kids) £25+£1 p+p sizes Girl design mouse mats..................................£5 inc. Girl design key rings ......................................50p inc Neck ties..........................................................£2.50 inc. Badges............................................................40p..3 for £1 Caps black or green as modelled by Linus below..£5 inc Stickers (see below, right)..................................60p inc. Denim jackets with HUGE Rock or Riot cover design embroidered on the back. 260 thousand billion stiches. About fifty quid. Yes, but they are good. Hooded Top Black/Navy or any colour you want just ask we are flexible. Caps Stickers Hooded Top embroidered Please make cheques payable to “The Blue Line Order” logo any colour (green Send to Blue Line Order, 22 Halifax Drive, LEICESTER, looks good) LE4 2GT.
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