www.QualifyForMedicaid.com Volume 2, Issue 9
1001 Craig Road, Suite 224, St. Louis, Missouri 63146 107 Southpointe Drive, Suite 2, Edwardsville, Illinois 62025
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‘TIS THE SEASON FOR STRESS, SPECIAL CHALLENGES
T he Holiday Season is a time for sharing. This issue you engage in.
begins with a message that you might want to share If you plan to take your loved one with you holiday shopping,
with those you know who are dealing with the chal- hit stores early in the day and on weekdays. Most malls and
lenge of caring for an elderly loved one. Then we offer up a department stores are far less crowded at these times. Also,
treat that we wanted to share with you, and that we hope you take along a picture of the person you are shopping for. This
will in turn share with others. provides a reminder to your loved one and an opportunity for
their input on the gift. Encourage your loved one to take part
Once again the Holiday Season is upon us. ‘Tis the season for
in wrapping the gifts when at home. Be mindful, however, of
mixed blessings. Along with the joys of the season come the
their frustration level if that presents a mental or physical chal-
stressors. This year you wonder how you will manage to get
lenge.
everything done. Your “to-do” list, as always, seems never-
ending with shopping, baking and decorating. This year, how- If you are doing any of the holiday cooking, establish the
ever, you know that at the top of your priority list is providing menu ahead of time. Plan to buy as many of the ingredients
the best possible care for your elderly loved one who suffers as possible a week or two in advance. Also, prepare whatever
will keep in the refrigerator or freezer ahead of time so that
from increased dementia or is experiencing an increasing need
there is less to do on the actual day of your gathering. Most
for your assistance.
importantly, don’t be afraid to ask others to bring along a dish.
This time of year can likewise create stress for your loved one Most guests would be happy to help.
whose anxiety levels seem to mirror your own. Unlike your-
Prepare your visiting family members for potential changes in
self, however, the dementia affects your loved one’s ability to
your loved one’s status. Imagine how drastic your loved one’s
express himself or herself clearly, or the increasing depend-
changes and declines would seem if you had not been present
ence produces feelings of helplessness. Simple changes in
to witness their gradual development. Sharing can help you
routine can cause unexpected anxiety, which increases with
prepare families and friends for the emotions they may feel
the inability to verbalize what they are feeling or a reluctance
when confronted with these changes.
to discuss increasing problems.
Ultimately, you cannot eliminate stress from every environ-
In addition to the stress on both the caregiver and care recipi-
ment. For this reason it is essential that you eat well, take
ent, out of town guests add a whole new dynamic. Family
time to exercise, and get plenty of sleep. If you keep your
members may feel shocked by your loved one’s mental and
own stress level in check, you can better focus on monitoring
physical changes. This shock can produce feelings of guilt or
the stress levels of your loved ones.
anger that may be directed at you. Your loved one may also
exhibit additional uneasiness – possibly viewing family mem- If the stress gets overwhelming, consider getting help with
bers as strangers, or feeling a sense of shame at being seen your care giving tasks. Home healthcare agencies can provide
by them. help a few hours a day or a few days a week. Adult day care
can give your loved one a safe environment in which to inter-
So the question remains, “How do you make it through the
act with others, and senior citizen centers often offer activities
holidays and maintain some semblance of peace?” And,
they may enjoy. If your holiday plans include an overnight
equally important, “How do you help your elderly loved one do
visit or an extended stay, check into “respite care.”
the same?”
If you are not familiar with what providers of these services
First of all, you may want to do some pre-planning. Waiting
offer, feel free to contact The Coulson Law Group, and we will
until the last minute often leaves a person feeling rushed and
do our best to help point you in the right direction. If cost is a
hurried. To avoid this unnecessary stress, create a list of prior-
concern, know that in some cases, respite care services are
ities and ask yourself what is really important. It may be best
available at reduced fees for those who meet financial eligibili-
to let go of a few “holiday traditions,” if that choice will enable
ty requirements.
your family the time to enjoy and savor the holiday activities
Our
holiday
gift to you!
Mrs. Fields Chocolate
Chip Cookies.
Our friends who receive this
newsletter work hard, and do not
receive nearly as much thanks and praise as
they deserve. You help people everyday. And
often, you’re dealing with people facing the toughest
time of their life.
In recognition of all that you do, we would love to send all of
you dozens and dozens of warm chocolate chip cookies . . . but we
can’t. So we’re going to give you the second best alternative . . . the
actual recipe for Mrs. Fields Chocolate Chip Cookies. (Honest!)
Mrs. Fields Chocolate Chip Cookies*
Ingredients: Everything is a standard chocolate chip cookie ingredient. 1 Cup butter or
1/2 Cup butter and 1/2 Cup margarine (many folks who have tried this recipe say they used a
blend to get butter flavor at margarine prices . . . but as grandmas the world over know, “Butter
Tastes Better.”), 2 1/4 Cups flour, 1 Cup brown sugar, 1/2 Cup sugar, 2 meduim eggs - beaten,
2 tsp. vanilla, 1/2 tsp. milk, 1/2 tsp. water, 1 tsp. baking soda, 1/2 tsp salt, 12 oz. chocolate chips,
1 Cup chopped walnuts.
For authenticity, use C&H sugar, Hershey’s chocolate chips, and Diamond walnuts. Chips may be
semisweet or milk chocolate (Mrs. Fields sells both varieties). Extract is the real kind, made from
vanilla beans, per the Mrs. Fields ban on artificial flavorings. The only “secret” ingredient, milk, adds
moisture and cooks into a fudge with butter and sugar. Soda (baking) creates an airy, cake-like texture.
Directions: Mix sugars, butter, and margarine in an electric mixer. Add other wet ingredients, mixing
well; then mix in flour, baking soda, and salt; then chocolate and nuts. Wear a plastic glove when forming
golf ball-sized lumps of dough (a spoon is useful). Chill in a refrigerator about a day. Set dough on an
ungreased lightweight baking sheet and flatten with gloved hand. Cook at 325 degrees Fahrenheit for about
15 _ minutes (time may vary with oven and temperature of dough). Cookies will be very soft when taken
from oven. Carefully lift with spatula and place on rack to cool. Target thickness of finished cookie: one-
half inch. Day old cookies may be donated to the homeless.
Old proverb revisited: If you give people a chocolate chip cookie, they’ll snack for a day, but if you teach
people to make a chocolate chip cookie . . . Enjoy!
Now feel free to pass this on to your own referral sources, and others whose efforts make your life a little bit
easier as a way for you to say “Thanks” to them.
*as revealed in Biggest Secrets by William Poundstone
Medicaid Planning Today is written by the attorneys of The Coulson Law Group,
Hospice Newsletter Coming . . . Wesley J. Coulson and Joseph Ilges, and is published as a service of The Coulson
Law Group, 1001 Craig Road, Suite 224, St. Louis, Missouri 63146; 107 Southpointe
The Coulson Law Group will be ringing in 2007 with a new newslet-
Drive, Suite 2, Edwardsville, Illinois 62025. This is for general informational
ter, Hospice Care and Planning. It will address the interrelated purposes only and does not constitute legal advice. For specific questions, you
medical, emotional, legal and other challenges faced by Hospice should consult a qualified attorney.
families. We will welcome contributions from guest columnists.
If you would like to be added to our mailing list for Hospice Care Advertising Material: Commercial solicitations are permitted by the
and Planning or would like to be a guest columnist, please contact Missouri and Illinois rules of professional conduct but are neither
our Director of Community Education and Outreach, Beth Frame, at submitted to nor approved by the Missouri or Illinois Bar or the
(314) 567-9292 or (618) 659-9292, or email to beth@coulsonlaw- Supreme Court of Missouri or Illinois. The choice of a lawyer is an
group.com, to be included in our distribution. important decision and should not be based solely on advertisements.
December 2006