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computer jokes

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computer jokes
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full of computer jokes

Shared by: Shushil Dewan
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3747
posted:
11/18/2011
language:
English
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Computer Jokes





Computers!!!

To err is human, but to mess up things very badly you need a computer.



Female Computer

The top six reasons that computers are female. 6. As soon as you have one, a

better one is just around the corner. 5. No one but the creator understands the

internal logic 4. Even your smallest mistakes are immediately committed to

memory for future reference. 3. The native language used to communicate

with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else. 2. The message

"Bad Command or File Name" is about as informative as : "If you don't

know why I'm mad at you, then I'm certainly not going to tell you". AND

THE NUMBER ONE REASON COMPUTERS ARE FEMALE: 1. As soon

as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half of your

paycheck on accessories for it.



ERRRR..........

ERRR...... OH........ OUCH........ OINK........



computerised

We have fully computerised our organisation. The first computer tells what's

wrong with second computer and the second tells whats wrong with first.



spacebardefect

Our office is fully computerised and we all are in a network. Once the space

bar of my key board was not working. I dialed to the system administrator

several times. But got no response. At last I got an idea and wished to

complaint by sending a message to him. The message was

"SPACEBARISSTRUCKPLEASECOMESOON". The very next day the

administrator was rubmling with Oxford's World Dictionary,Chambers

Dictionary and a Collins Cobuild.



laugh laugh

what do you call a man with one hair on his head Icbal singh.



electrician

What do call a east indian electricians wife? Currento ….



Keralite

It is wrong to say that the law of gravity was invented by a foreigner. Infact

it was discovered by one Indian Malyalee-Keralite. One day he was sitting

under a coconut tree and and one coconut fell on his head but he was unable

to tell the theory to the world because he died instantly.



Difference

Q: What's the difference between a computer and a woman? A: A computer

will take a three and a half inch floppy.



rip off doctor

who is a doctor? a doctor is a person who cures your ills, with all the pills,

and then kills you with all his bills.



Keyboard

Fatal error : Keyboard not present , Press F1 to continue.



why God made woman?????

Q. Why did God make women? A. When he made a man, he stepped back

and scratched his head and said, " i can do better than that" ...



Wise women

There were 4 characters in a room, a wise man, a wise woman, dracula and

mickey mouse. Someone gets up and switches off the lights, guess who? A.

The wise woman, coz all others r fictitious characters.....( hey I am not a

feminist, ok !!).



Paintbrush

how does a surd,a computer proffessional, paint his house. A: Using

Paintbrush.



Bill Clinton

Bill Clinton was taking bath in marina beach. Suddenly his feet slip the

ground and he started sinking . He souted " F1 ...F1... F1... " , but no one

came for help. Bad luck with computer.



"C" jokes

struct Indian_Bachelor_software_professional { double standards; short

sighted; long time_between_visits_to_India; float horoscope; void girlfriend;

char desperate; }; struct Married_Indian_Software_Professional { double

trouble; short changed; long sighs; float hopes; void independence; char

philosophical; }; struct Indian_Engaged_software_professional { double

time_at_work; // to get long vacation to India short attention_span; long

phone_calls_to_India; float on_cloud_nine; void bank_balance; char edgy;

}; struct Indian_Newly_Married_software_professional { double

dinner_invitations; short time_at_work; long lunch_breaks; float

wife_resumes; void bank_balance; char hen_pecked; }; struct

Indian_husband_wife_software_professional { double income; short temper;

long time_no_see; float new_software_company; void love_life; char

money_minded; };


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