MLHS New Course Selections by pengxiang



Cafeteria Bans Chocolate
                         ountaineer   Powerville Road                  Mountain Lakes,              New Jersey

                                                                                 MLHS New Course Selections
                                                                                                                          07046           Volume 18           No. 4
                                                                                                                                                                                1 April 2011

Chip Muffins                                                                     Natalie Kane ‘14
Mountaineer Staff
                                                                                 Online Courses                                                  New Electives
	              Due	 to	 recent	 findings	 by	 the	 Food	 and	 Drug	Ad-
ministration,	all	chocolate	chip	muffins	must	be	banned	from	                    Online Gym                                   5 Credits          Vacation Planning (1 & 2)                   2.5 Credits
New	Jersey	high	school	cafeterias.	To	take	the	place	of	the	                                                                  Full Year                                                        Half Year
very	 toxic	 cocoa	 ingredient	 that	 students	 have	 been	 blindly	             Due to the great demand for this course, it will be go-         Learn to choose a fun destination and safely roll lug-
                                                   ingesting,	 the	 FDA	         ing online next year. Enjoy all your favorite units:            gage! Students will also practice how to properly op-
                                                   has	 created	 a	 new	         badminton, floor hockey, soccer, and many more!                 erate beach chairs, take cheesy vacation photos, and
                                                   muffin	 hybrid.	 Stu-                                                                         look like a tourist. Level 2 students will form groups
                                                   dents	 will	 now	 line	       Honors Online Gym                                6 Credits      and put their new skills to use on a weekend getaway.
                                                   up	to	 enjoy	tofu-ba-                                                          Full Year
                                                   con	bran	muffins.	            This more rigorous gym class covers extreme sports, in-         Live Social Network                        2.5 Credits
                                                   First	 to	 try	 this	         cluding but not limited to rock climbing, snowboarding,                                                     Half Year
                                                   culinary	 concotion	          hot air ballooning, and croquet. Students must attend a lab     Chat with your friends-IN PERSON! Be the first to
                                                   will	 be	 our	 very	          once a week to complete the more extensive workload.            learn the ins and outs of the new face-to-face com-
                                                   own	 MLHS	 cafete-                                                                            munication trend that is taking the country by storm. ria	 starting	 April	 1,	     Online Woodshop                               2.5 Credits
                                                   2011.	The	silky	tex-                                                         Half Year        Underwater Bowling                                     5 Credits
ture	of	the	tofu	baked	with	the	smoky	flavor	of	bacon	com-                       Learn how to use brand new power tool apps to build a                                                                  Full Year
bine	to	create	an	out-of-this-world	muffin	experience!	Soon	                     variety of projects using virtual wood. All students will
to	 come,	 brussel	 sprout	 blue	 cheese	 corn	 muffins	 and	 the	               complete a turkey feeder, gargoyle, and pair of flip flops.
highly	 anticipated	 rhubarb	 asparagrass	 banana	 muffin.	 Plan	
to	leave	class	early-these	new	snacks	will	fly	off	the	rack!                     AP Clown College                               5 Credits
                                                                                                                                Full Year
New MLHS Dress Code!                                                             Clowns are cool! Students will develop a working knowl-
                                                                                 edge in a variety of mandatory clown college subjects in-
Natalie Kane ‘14
                                                                                 cluding Walking Safely in Clown Shoes, Pogo-Sticking,
	         At	 this	 time,	 the	 MLHS	 administrators	 and	 the	                  and Surviving Face Paint.
Mountain	Lakes	Board	of	Education	find	it	necessary	to	en-
force	a	few	slight	changes	to	the	current	MLHS	dress	code:

1.   Hats must be worn at all times inside the school building.
     Extremely large and/or bizarre hats are preferred but not                                                                         
                                                                                                                                                 A panel of student testers recently raved, “If you’re looking
                                                                                                                                                 for the best underwater sport in which participants wear
                                                                                                                                                 snorkel masks and carry a heavy ball, this is definitely the
                                                                                                                                                 one!” Learn the game that is quickly becoming the new
                                                                                                                                                 national pastime, then join the fight to form an MLHS
                                                                                                                                                 team in the brand-new Northeastern New Jersey Division!

                                                                                                                                                 Welcome to the 60s                                     5 Credits
                                                                                                                                                                                                        Full Year

                                                                                 Photo Courtesy of Mr. Murray Robertson

                                                                                 World Language Courses
                                                                                 21st Century Morse                                5 Credits
                                                                                 Code Applications                                 Full Year
2.   No blue or orange may be worn. This also includes any                       Be the first to get in on the new Morse Code craze! Learn to
     school sports shirts or hoodies; we apologize for any                       chat with friends, have discussions with teachers and-most
     shopping inconveniences caused by this rule but the                         useful-send urgent distress signals.
     new school colors are now mustard yellow and pistachio
     green. See the school store for new Laker gear.                             Dead Languages 101                               5 Credits
3.   No shoes are allowed, including Uggs. Upon entering                                                                          Full Year
     the school building, students must change into appropri-                    This survey course introduces many forgotten languages,
     ate footwear, such as fuzzy slippers or silly socks.                        such as Cuneiform, Cave Speak, and the to date untranslat-
                                                                                 ed ancient language of the Indus River Valley, and explores
                                                                                 the vast impact they have on today’s society. Advanced
                                                                                 students will also learn about career opportunities, which
                                                                                 require fluency in these increasingly practical languages.

                                                                                 Proper Texting Grammar                           5 Credits      Retro is in! In this fast-paced course, you will learn how to
                                                                                                                                  Full Year      bring the 60s back in every aspect. Students will create fash-
                                                                                 Do u nvr undrstnd ur bffs’ cryptc msgs? Do u wish u had         ionable outfits for all occasions and learn in-demand busi-
                                                                                 paid + attenshun in 3rd grd grammar lssns? Ten dis izz          ness skills such as typing, stenography, mimeograph, and
                                                                                 da class 4 u! In dis fast-paced course, students will study     the art of organizing file cabinets (standard and legal). The
                                                                                 n ultimatly master da puzzel dat izz texting grammerz.          most promising students will be awarded summer intern-
                                                                                                                                                 ships at the World Wide Wicket Company in New York City!

                                                                               NEW iPhone Apps Coming Soon!
                                                                               Kiley Sheridan ‘13 and Hamza Shad ‘13                             •	    iLAX	BRO: Self-explanatory.
                                                                                                                                                 •	    iGYM: Run the mile in less than 13 minutes, guaran-
                                                                                        They’re finally here: the new must-have apps that              teed!
                                                                               every high school student has been waiting for!                   •	    iTIME	MACHINE: Late for class? Go back in time                                                                                                                                   and ensure that you arrive before the bell. Class drag-
4.   At least one item of backwards or inside out clothing •	                      iLAZY: Gives the greatest, quick excuses for senioritis,            ging? With just one click, class will be over and you will
     must be worn at all times.This rule applies to everyday                       junioritis, sophomoritis, and oh yes, freshmanitis.                 retain all the info!
     except Friday, described below.                          •	                   iANSWERS: Teacher’s Answer Key; available in up to            •	    iREAD	BY	OSMOSIS: Too much homework? Let
5.   Going forward, every Friday will be a Dress Up Day.                           100 different courses!                                              your iPhone do all the reading for you!
     Boys must wear suits and ties and girls must wear dress- •	                   iVENDING	MACHINE: need a snack in class? For-                 •	    iDISRUPTER: Turn off your teacher’s Smart Board,
     es. Appropriately formal hats are expected.                                   got your pen or pencil? This vending machine has it all!            erase all tests from his or her hard drive, and add A+
                                                              •	                   iMOUNTAINEER:	Get the latest news!                                  grades for everyone in the grade book.
                                                                                                               1                          Visit us online @ for more articles!
Read Across Amer-
                                                        Mountain Lakes Fashion Show                                                                     Earthquake
ica Service Project                                        Benefiting Team Zoey
Inspires Seniors and                              Meghan Kasel ‘11                                                                                      Shakes Japan
First Graders Alike                               ion
                                                            On March 10, 2011, a group of MLHS students put on a fash-
                                                           show      benefiting    the    fundraising     organization,    Team      Zoey.
                                                                                                                                                        Travis Shingledecker ‘13

                                                            Team Zoey, which benefits the Progeria Research Foundation, is a group that has                       On March 11, at 2:46 p.m. in Tokyo
Rebecca Hadjiloucas ‘11                           a close tie to the Mountain Lakes community. Zoey Penny, of Verona, NJ, is the namesake               time, the largest earthquake ever recorded in
                                                  of the organization, and her great aunt, Barbara Batesko, is a Mountain Lakes resident.               Japan of an 8.9-magnitude devastated the na-
          Earlier in March, an assembly of
                                                            Zoey is one of 78 children worldwide that have been diagnosed with Pro-
senior students from the National Honor                                                                                                                 tion, which was followed by walls of water
                                                  geria, a rare, rapid-aging disease, and continues to fight the disease as Team Zoey
Society and Mrs. Preston’s health class                                                                                                                 because of the consequential tsunami. In one
                                                  raises money towards finding both treatments and a cure. In 2010, the group
traveled to Wildwood Elementary School
                                                  raised over $400,000 dollars for the PRF, and their goal for 2011 is $500,000.                        of the most recent reports, the police have
to promote NEA’s Read Across America.
In celebration of Dr. Seuss’s birthday, se-                                                                                                             stated that the earthquake and tsunami caused
niors read their favorite childhood books to                                                                                                            a death toll of approximately 10,000 people
groups of first graders. Afterwards, each first                                                                                                         and the number of missing people has aston-
grade class read a Dr. Seuss poem aloud.
          The event allowed seniors to ex-                                                                                                              ishingly reached 16,000. In addition there
press their interest in reading, and served as                                                                                                          are signs of previous civilization in the rub-
an act of gratitude to the community, school,                                                                                                           ble of the cities and it seems imperceptible.
and teachers who fostered such interests. Of
                                                                                                                                                                  During a television conference on
the activities, senior Brooke Dubnoff states,
“I really enjoyed reading to the first grad-                                                                                                            Sunday, the Prime Minister of Japan, Naoto
ers- they were very excited to read with us                                                                                                             Kan, stated, “In the 65 years after the end
too! The seniors benefited from their positive                                                                                                          of World War II, this is the toughest and the
feedback, and we showed them that read-
ing is fun. It was a great day for everyone.”                                                                                                           most difficult crisis for Japan.” To highlight
          Hopefully, the day inspired younger
students to read not only for their academic                                                                                                               Prime Minister of Japan,
benefit, but as a source of enjoyment as well.                                                                                                             Naoto Kan, stated, “In
Reading promotes a creative imagination, and
with the Wildwood first graders so receptive to
                                                                                                                                                           the 65 years after the end
encouragement, tomorrow is sure to be bright.
                                                  Kudos to the team leader and the committe of six dedicated students who made it all                      of World War II, this is the
                                                  happen! From left to right: Mackenzie Kaczka ‘12, Jon Khalev ‘11, Sarah Smith ‘11, Bri-                  toughest and the most dif-

                                                  anna Goodwin ‘11 (team leader), Aly Wolpov ‘12, Meghan Kassel ‘11, Alex Stubbs ‘12.
                                                  Photo Courtesy of Aly Wolpov ‘12.
                                                                                                                                                           ficult crisis for Japan.”

                                                            Helping them towards their goal is Brianna Goodwin ’11. When asked why she
                                                                                                                                                        the desperation of the survivors of this natural
                                                  decided to do the fashion show, Brianna explained, “I decided to do a charity fashion show

Bowl a Great                                      this year because the past two years, Jackie Ansell ‘10 did the same event, and allowed me            disaster, a Japanese newspaper reported that
                                                  to help her out. She inspired me, and I am thrilled to be continuing the wonderful work she           there had been about 600 survivors on the

Success                                           started.” The idea to help Team Zoey was a natural choice for Brianna, who adds, “I knew
                                                  from the beginning that I wanted to benefit Team Zoey because I was so moved by the amount
                                                  of money the organization was able to raise in only a year for this one and a half year old girl.”
                                                                                                                                                        roof of a public grade school in Sendai City
                                                                                                                                                        after the tragic event. As of last Saturday, only
Brit Felsen-Parsons ‘12
                                                            Though the choice of charity came easily, the planning and executing of the event           150 of these individuals had been evacuated
          A congratulations is in order for                                                       was a long and tedious process. Helping Bri-          by firefighters. There is little to no electric-
students Kayla Kmetz, Naomi Leung, Da-                                                            anna with the process was a committee of              ity and water for the victims in the shelters.
vid Manis, and Amin Randolph for making                                                           six Mountain Lakes students that she ap-
it to the “Sweet 16” at the 2011 National                                                         proached herself, including seniors Meghan                       On top of the grim results of this
Academic Bowl Competition at Gallau-                                                              Kasel ’11, Sarah Smith ‘11, and Jon Kha-              earthquake on a prepared country, there are
det University in Washington, DC. Spe-                                                            lev ‘11, and juniors Aly Wolpov ‘12, Mack-            developing concerns revolving around the
cial recognition goes to senior David Ma-                                                         enzie Kaczka ‘12 and Alex Stubbs ‘12.
                                                                                                                                                        radiation leaks emanating from two nuclear
nis, who was awarded an All-Star Award                                                             The show was held at the Darress Theatre
and medal at this year’s competition.                                                             in Boonton, a surprising choice because the           plants located near the region of the disaster.
                                                                                                  previous two years, the show was held at
                                                                                                  the Mountain Lakes Community Church.
                                                                                                  Brianna states her reasoning, “I chose the
                                                                                                  Darress because there is such an old, yet
                                                                                                  vintage, feel to the theater itself and Tom,
                                                  the manager, was so accommodating in terms of price, flexibility, and size of the show.”
                                                            Our very own students and some members of the faculty includ-
                                                  ing Mr. Wolfelsperger and Mr. Merritt modeled clothes donated by Robin’s Clos-
                                                  et Boutique in Boonton and the Banana Republic located at the Short Hills Mall.
                                                            The show was a huge success. With over 300 in attendance, the theater was filled
                                                  to capacity. All together, the fashion show, including program advertisements, ticket sales,
                                                  raffle baskets and bake sales raised over 5,000 dollars for the Progeria Research Founda-
                                                  tion. As for Brianna, she could not be more thrilled with the outcome of the show, say-
                                                  ing, “I was overwhelmed with the amount of generosity from everyone in our community
                                                  to lend a helping hand…and I hope that this will become an annual event with the juniors
                                                  that aided me this year working to create an even better show next year. Community service
                                                  never ends in my opinion, and with such a fun an exciting event, it can only get better.”
                                                            If you wish to make a donation to Team Zoey, please visit

     David Manis sporting his medal.
     Photo courtesy of Diane Hewitt                                                                                                                                             

         Every year since 1997, the Aca-
                                                                                                                                                        To cool down the meltdowns of the affected
demic Bowl for Deaf and Hard of Hearing
has been held at Gallaudet University with                                                                                                              nuclear reactors, Japanese officials have been
the “goal of promoting academic compe-                                                                                                                  flooding them with sea-water. However, con-
tition among school teams,” according to                                                                                                                sidering the fact that with the high pressure
Gallaudet U’s website. This program has
become immensely popular nationwide, al-                                                                                                                inside the reactors along with the effects to
lowing hard-of-hearing students to shine                                                                                                                utilize the cooling water, plant operators
and celebrate their academic achievements.                                                                                                              have unintentionally released radioactive
         To those students who participated                                                                                                             vapor into the atmosphere. Since this occur-
so admirably this year, thank you for repre-
senting Lake Drive/MLHS so wonderfully!!                                                                                                                rence, many evacuations have taken place.

                                                                                                 2                             Visit us online @ for more articles!
    Mountain Lakes High School Musical -
How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying
Travis Shingledecker ‘13                                                                                                                           As with every high school year, the Drama Depart-
                                                                                                                                         ment will especially miss the commitment and immense tal-
        Between the dates of March 3rd and March                                                                                         ent of the seniors, which include Lauren Currenti, Nicholas
6th, the MLHS auditorium transformed itself into the                                                                                     Brigante, Kristin Drabik, Danielle Galluzzi, Leah Gonza-
World Wide Wicket building, a thriving company in                                                                                        lez, and Julia Gross. Lauren Mesagno (the stage manager),
New York City circa 1961, for this year’s spring musi-                                                                                   Raphaela Putz, Janice Wilson (hair/make-up assistants),
cal, How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying!                                                                                   Deb Ko, Robbie Gentul, Ryland Brickener-McDonald,
                                                                                                                                         Isabelle Laurenzi, and Maddie Hu (pit orchestra), will cer-
                                                                                                                                         tainly be lost key components of the department as well.
                                                                                                                                                   After the tremendous achievements of the talented
                                                                                                                                         cast and crew this year, the entire Mountain Lakes student
                                                                                                                                         body is anxiously awaiting to see next year’s production.

                                                                     coffee, the audience was certainly in for an entertaining night!
                                                                               With great sets, stellar music, and amazing chore-
                                                                     ography, the MLHS auditorium was buzzing with appraisal
                                                                     after each performance. The “success” of this show, however,
                                                                     would not have been possible without the dedication and ex-
                                                                     pertise of the show’s directors who must be commended. Mr.
                                                                     John Giresi, the director, and Mrs. Boyan, the assistant director
                                                                     and high school instrumental music instructor, are among the
                                                                     most important individuals to acknowledge. The Mountain
                                                                     Lakes High School cast performed to their fullest potential.
                                                                     Additionally, the cast is thankful for the contributions made by
                                                                     Dr. Sundquist, the vocal director, Mr. Bernotas, the music di-
                                                                     rector and conductor, and Mr. Don Howes, the choreographer.
          This business satire describes the ventures of an am-
bitious window washer who desires to venture through the busi-
ness hierarchy of the World Wide Wicket Company without                                                                                    Photos Courtesy of Douglas J. Merritt
actually having any necessary credentials. Between a young                                                                                 This year’s musical was in a word - amazing! The
man’s struggles for success, a woman’s yearning for attention                                                                              dedication and hours of hardwork by the actors,
from her true love, and a love affair between the boss of the com-                                                                         pit orchestra, stage crew, make-up artists, and
pany and a fatuous secretary, and the endless endeavor to find                                                                             choreogrpaher paid off. It truly was a “success!”

                                                                     Photo Courtesy of Mark Majowicz

MLHS	Band	Trip	to	WDW
Harrison Charwat ‘13
                                                                                                                                         New Record: 94 Pints
                                                                                                                                         Brit Felsen-Parsons ‘12
          On the 14th and 15th of March many students were absent from school, and these same people came to                                       The annual Blood Drive was a great success this
school the next day bragging about a trip to Disney World with “the band.” They were telling the truth. From                             year! With a total of 94 pints of blood collected, Moun-
the 12th until the 15th, approximately 60 members of the MLHS band program were in Orlando Florida vis-                                  tain Lakes High School has topped its highest score ever
iting Disney World. This trip may seem to to be an excuse to get out of a few days of school and hang out in Disney                      by over fifty percent. The blood donated will be used in
World., but the band actually did partake in activities that helped them learn new skills and gain new experiences.                      much-needed transfusions for victims of severe blood loss.
          After sleeping in “late”, the band members met at the school at 3 am on Saturday the 12th to get to the airport.               According to America’s Blood Centers, a person needs
Courtesy of a Professional Photographer                                     They were on one of the first flights out. The               blood every two seconds; in fact, one out of every seven
                                                                            trip led them straight to Magic Kingdom,                     people admitted into the hospital will need a transfusion.
                                                                            where the day was enjoyed by going on rides                  Consider taking part in this great opportunity to help
                                                                            and basically having fun. The next day took                  others     next     year,     because       the     one     pint
                                                                            them to Epcot to attend a clinic where they                  you donate could save up to three lives!
                                                                            learned what it is like to perform for an ani-                         School Nurse, Mrs. Wojcik, would like to
                                                                            mated movie. Essentially it required a lot of                thank all those who participated in the blood drive:
                                                                            sight-reading or playing music a person never                “Our 10th Annual School and Community Blood Drive was
                                                                            saw before. At this clinic the band was re-                  by far the most well attended. In my 10 years here at Moun-
                                                                            corded and the recording was placed behind an                tain Lakes High School coordinating this yearly event, we had
                                                                            animated movie, Tarzan. A copy of this anima-                the biggest turnout ever. This year in honor of the Mountain
                                                                            tion was given to the school. On Monday, the                 Lakes Centennial, our goal was to collect 100 pints of blood.
                                                                            band performed in Downtown Disney forthe                     We came up just a little short of that goal, but the Blood Cen-
                                                                            passers by. For this performance each member                 ter of New Jersey was very pleased with the 94 pints that
                                                                            was given a commemorative pin, as an Hon-                    were collected. Our usual goal is 60, so we surpassed that by
                                                                            orary Cast Member. They also visited Holly-                  34. This blood drive was a super great effort by all. Many
                                                                            wood Studios and Animal Kingdom, complet-                    thanks to all those staff members, students and family mem-
                                                                            ing the trip to every Disney park. By Tuesday                bers who chose to be a blood donor. It is a very good feel-
                                                                            everyone was exhausted, but still did not want
                                                                                                                                         ing, when you can give the “gift of life”. Thank you one and
                                                                            to leave the sunshine and excitement of Disney.
                                                                                                                                         all for making this blood drive, our most successful ever!”
                                                                                                       3                         Visit us online @ for more articles!
“Race To Nowhere” Unsurpris-                                                                                      The underlying message of the film is that an indi-
                                                                                                      vidual’s environment dictates his or her actions. I do not accept
                                                                                                                                                                            employer, the big companies, or in this case, the state, with
                                                                                                                                                                            all the power. The foundation of our government is the ideol-
ingly Stuck at the Starting Line                                                                      this. That the individual and the environment being connected         ogy that the people should have a voice. Unions do just that.
Rebecca Hadjiloucas ‘11                                                                               is cause to assume dominance of the latter is a fallacy. Instead,
                                                                                                      it is just as true that the individual dictates his own environ-
          On March 7, at 7:30pm, I sat down in the crowd-                                             ment. Let not your surrounding change you; you change your
ed school auditorium. Parents, students, and teachers                                                 surroundings. No matter how strict the parent, draconian the
filled the seats, waiting in silent anticipation for the highly                                       teacher, or militaristic the coach, there is no situation where
praised and widely discussed film “Race to Nowhere.”                                                  a student is completely voiceless. All students have a say in
I’ll be honest, after hearing brief reviews of the general                                            how many difficult classes to select, sports to participate in,
theme and finding them contrary to my own beliefs and                                                 and clubs to join. That speaking up is often “trying” serves
experiences, I was not expecting to be moved by the film.                                             no excuse for remaining silent. Control over one’s environ-
                                                                                                      ment should be the message of the film; it is up to students
  “I became, and remain, an-                                                                          to decide for themselves their own interests and workload.
  gered at the audacity of false au-                                                                              The film suggests that all students are forced to be
  thorities to claim I am a victim.”                                                                  slaves of the system. That they are slaves of the system may
                                                                                                      be true, but they are not forced to be. To restrict AP classes,
                                                                                                      extracurricular activities, cut practices, and “stop homework,”
           As I watched students testify against the horrors                                          as the film suggests, is to deprive students of a voice. Schools      Photo courtesy of
of the modern age and failed education system, and teach-                                             should offer the most difficult courses and activities; coaches
ers and parents apologize for stealing a generation’s child-
hood, I did in fact become quite moved. Perhaps angered is a
                                                                                                      should train their teams to win; and parents should encour-
                                                                                                      age children to work hard, get A’s, perform, produce, and so
                                                                                                                                                                            Supress the
                                                                                                                                                                            Cheesehead Revolt!
more suitable word. No, not at my parents for expecting me                                            on. Life is performing and producing: that will never change.
to achieve, and not at my teachers for assigning homework                                             Besides, what other option is there- apathetic stagnation?
or papers, and still not at any organizations or clubs of which                                                                                                             Travis Shingledecker‘13
I am a member. I became, and remain, angered at the audac-
ity of false authorities to claim I am a victim.
                                                                                                        “Where is this Utopian child-                                                  Beginning on February 14th, protests have been
                                                                                                        hood the film serves to glorify?”                                   blazing across the United States in relation to the desires of
  For student stress survey results go to                                                                                                                                   the newly elected Republican Governor of Wisconsin, Scott
                                                                                                                                                                            Walker. The heart of these protests is beating near the State                                                                               Where is this Utopian childhood the film serves to         Capitol located in Madison with thousands of union mem-
                                                                                                      glorify? I would like to know just when it has ever existed.          bers, students, and citizens protesting the Wisconsin Budget
                                                                                                      Surely, it did not exist during ancient times, or in the middle       Repair Bill. Despite these fervent pleas for rejection, the
                                                                                                      ages under threat of invasion, epidemic, or famine. Did it ex-
                                                                                                                                                                            amended bill was passed earlier this month. Although it may
                                                                                                      ist during the Renaissance, when girls as young as 13 were
                                                                                                                                                                            cause fear to some in the general public, perhaps it will aid the
                                                                                                      forced to marry and denied an education? Perhaps it was in
                                                                                                                                                                            state in avoiding the projected $3.6 million hole in the budget.
                                                                                                      the 19th century, when children were exploited for cheap la-
                                                                                                      bor? Or during the 20th century, when many schools were
                                                                                                      still segregated; or WWI, WWII, Korea, or Vietnam when                 “...others believe that collective bar-
                                                                                                      young men entered the war field, just children themselves?             gaining has actually been a fero-
                                                                                                                 Until the last century, the idea that children should       cious antagonist towards employ-
                                                                                                      have something in the way of a childhood as we know it
                                                                                                      had never existed; so how outrageous to propose modern                 ers who deal with the unions.”
                                                                                                      education has stolen our childhoods. In fact, it’s one of the
                                                                                                      greatest reasons why childhood exists in the first place!
                                                                                                                 Yet my anger is not limited to the factual inac-                      This Budget Repair Bill addresses several issues
                                                                                                      curacies of the film. I am disturbed at how proponents                such as having public workers pay more for health insurance
                                                                                                      of “Race to Nowhere” claim that any non-believer sim-                 and pensions, and a more controversial issue, weakening the
                                                                                                      ply isn’t realistic as to what an average student can and             public sector unions through abridging collective bargain-
                                                                                                      cannot do. My problem is not that students cannot do                  ing rights. Collective bargaining relates to the negotiations
                                                                                                      it all; that is my very message. My problem is that the               of wages and other ideals between workers and an organized
                                                                                                      film attempts to make allowances for skewed priorities.               body, most often a union. In response to these seemingly un-
                                                                                                                 Instead of saying “you can’t do it all,” Race to No-       popular demands made by Walker, state senate Democrats
                                                                                                      where says, “let’s adjust what ‘all’ means to fit into what you       stalled the voting procedures by leaving the state to prevent a
                                                                                                      can do.” We all have different interests, talents, and tolerance      quorum. To counter this political strategy, the senate Repub-
                                                                                                      levels. But if society keeps taking a hatchet to level everyone off   licans amended the bill by eliminating elements pertaining to
                                                                                                      at the same height, we will never even know our true potential.       appropriating funds, which enabled the senators to vote as the

                                                                                                      Unions Need A
                                                                                                                                                                            requirement for the amount of senators and the bill was passed.
                                                                                                                                                                                        The Director of Government Relations for the

          The                                                                                                                                                               National Education Association, Kim Anderson, believes
                                                                                                      Voice Too                                                             “The events in Wisconsin [are] [some] of the worst at-
                                                                                                                                                                            tacks on workers’ rights and their voices in the work-
                                                                                                      J Pulitano ‘11                                                        place that we’ve ever seen.” However, others believe that
                 Editorial Board
      Editor-in-Chief...............................................Rebecca Hadjiloucas
                                                                                                                 Recently, all eyes have been on Wisconsin. Gov-            collective bargaining has actually been a ferocious an-
                                                                                                                                                                            tagonist towards employers who deal with the unions.
      News Editors.....................................................................Hamza Shad
                                                                                                      ernor Scott Walker introduced a proposal to solve the state’s

                                                                            Maddy DiGiovani
                                                                                                      $136 million deficit by increasing public workers’ contribu-                     In 2010, teacher Megan Samson, was given the hon-
                                                                                                      tion to pensions and healthcare costs. More controversial,            orary title of “Outstanding First Year Teacher” in Wisconsin.

      Opinions Editor....................................................................J Pulitano
                                                                                                      however, is the fact that the proposal limits collective bar-         A week later, she was given a lay-off notice from the Milwau-
                                                                                                      gaining rights. In response to this proposal, tens of thousands       kee Public School. Due to her collective-bargaining contract,
      Features Editors..............................................Brit Felsen-Parsons
                                                                      Maddy DiGiovani
                                                                                                      of demonstrators from both sides protested at the state capi-         this staffing decision was based on seniority and did not regard
                                                                                                      tal. This debate has spread beyond the Wisconsin state line.          her state-recognized excellence as a teacher. In such an edu-

      Toadstool Editor..............................................Brit Felsen-Parsons
                                                                                                                 In our country today, the gap between the rich and         cationally competitive nation, can our children really afford
                                                                                                      the poor is widening. A small percentage of big corporations          to lose the opportunity to learn from the best educators be-
      Reviews Editors..........................................................Kiley Sheridan
                                                                                                      have a disproportionate amount of our country’s wealth. At-
                                                                    Brit Felsen-Parsons
                                                                                                                                                                            cause of such ludicrous dictations? An overwhelming amount
                                                                                                      taining wealth is not a “bad” thing, but when the wealthy             of states in the nation answered this question as 24 states have

      Layout Editor..............................................................Kiley Sheridan
                                                                                                      can “donate” money to a political leader or party, that leader        laws that limit or outlaw public sector collective bargaining.
                                                                                                      or party is obviously going to pass policies that favor the                      Despite some of the obvious shortfalls of collective
                                                                                                      wealthy. This is why two-thirds of all U.S. corporations do not
                    Staff (this issue): Kramer Campisano, Har-                                                                                                              bargaining, Governor Walker is not completely eliminating it,
                    rison Charwat, Abi Hsu, Evan Johnson,                                             pay federal income taxes, and why sixty percent of corpora-
                                                                                                                                                                            as unions seem to argue, for wages can still be managed. Wal-
                    Natalie Kane, Meghan Kasel, Julie Paporel-                                        tions in Wisconsin (that make more than $1 million per year
                                                                                                                                                                            ter simply does not believe in the increasing potency of unions
                    lo, Sean Pollock, and Travis Shingledecker                                        in revenues), do not pay any taxes. Governor Walker states
                                                                                                                                                                            and collective bargaining in the state of Wisconsin. Not in-
            The Mountaineer is published 4-6 times a school year.                                     that restricting the power of unions is necessary for the bud-
                        Our offices are located at:                                                   get, but why take away the voices of teachers or other public         cluding the fact that this bill may “meet the needs of [Wiscon-
                       Mountain Lakes High School
                                                                                                      workers before making these big corporations pay their taxes?         sin] and give [the] government the tools to deal with this and
               96 Powerville Road, Mountain Lakes, NJ 07046
                                                                                                                 With limited collective bargaining power, unions           future budget crises,” states Walter. The topic seems to place
        Visit us online @
                                                                                                      have limited power as a whole. Unions are necessary for work-         an interesting emphasis upon unions in our country. This is-
                           To contact us call: 973-334-8400                                           ers to have a say in salaries and ensure equality and safe work-      sue will undoubtedly play an integral role in the presidential
                                                                                                      ing conditions. Unions are a necessary function in the contract       election in 2012, which will in turn have an immense effect
               Advisors: Virginia Dunphy and Keriann Eklund
                                                                                                      between a worker and employer. Without them, it is only the           on the economic status, a recurring concern for our country.

                                                                                                                                      4                             Visit us online @ for more articles!
Let the Arab Spring Blossom
                                                                                                                                                           craziness clearly suggest something is
Hamza Shad ‘13
                                                                                                                                                           wrong with him, such as when he de-
          It all started with a young street vendor setting                                                                                                clared that the widespread protests were
himself on fire in Tunisia on December 17, 2010. This as-                                                                                                  caused by al-Qaeda placing hallucino-
tonishing catalyst set off a wave of mass protests and dem-                                                                                                genic drugs in Libyans’ milk. He actu-
onstrations throughout the country and in North Africa and                                                                                                 ally thinks that the majority of Libyans
the Middle East. An unparalleled series of events, it has been                                                                                             supports him and will rise up to kill the
called the Arab Spring. In this Facebook and Twitter age,                                                                                                  protestors, and in an effort to violently
news spreads unimaginably fast, and the revolutionary young                                                                                                suppress the protests, he has hired hun-
Tunisians used these resources to their advantage by raising                                                                                               dreds of foreign mercenaries. For a
awareness and organizing events and demonstrations. The                                                                                                    small population of six million people,
citizens were sick of unemployment, inflation, unchanging                                                                                                  Libya has a disproportionately high 21%
government policy, corruption, poor living conditions, and                                                                                                 rate of unemployment. Qaddafi has done
lack of free speech, so they rose up to challenge the static                                                                                               little to modernize the country, while his
authority. By mid-January, President Zine El Abidine Ben                                                                                                   sons party in Europe and live in man-
Ali was ousted after a long 23 years, and a coalition govern-                                                                                              sions. For him to expect the people to
                                                                  Lipman Capitol Times
ment was formed – which inluded many people from the ex-                                                                                                   tolerate this behavior is unacceptable.
president’s party. This was still unacceptable to the people,     would not seek reelection, President Hosni Mubarak ended                                 Starting on February 15, the Libyan
so protests continued. At the end of January, all members of      up giving in to the people’s will on February 11, with Vice        uprising has also been greatly helped by social media. But
the party were removed from office, except Prime Minister         President Omer Suleiman quietly following him. Power was           in Libya, the military has remained in, and he even ordered
Mohamed Ghannouchi, who resigned at the end of Febru-             transferred to the military, specifically the Supreme Council of   them to fire on peaceful protestors from gunships. The dic-
ary. By early March the entire party was disbanded. This is       the Armed Forces, a body of 18 senior military officers. This      tator has encouraged forms of violence against anyone who
the power of the people, the force of the masses. When vast       junta is led by the de facto head of state, Mohamed Tantawi,       questions his authority, and people are afraid to even leave
mumbers of people rally together for a cause, it always makes     who suspended the Constitution and dissolved both houses of        their homes. Libya has had the highest death toll of the Arab
a difference. The acting president, Fouad Mebazaa, was ap-        parliament on February 13. Although this sounds negative, so       protests, with probably over 10,000 dead. On February 27,
pointed by the Constitutional Council following Ben Ali’s         far the military has been loyal to the people and announced        the opposition formed the National Transitional Council in
resignation, and Beji Caid el Sebsi became Prime Minister         that parliamentary elections will be held in June and presiden-    the city of Benghazi, a body designed to lead the revolu-
after Ghannouchi’s resignation. Acting President Mebazaa          tial elections in August. Hopefully, the army will continue to     tion and form an interim government. France, Portugal, the
declared that parliamentary elections will be held in July,       stay true to its people and support a transition to democracy.     United Kingdom, and the Arab League have all recognized
and it appears that general elections will be at a later date.               Of all the Arab revolutions, the most painful and       the National Transitional Council as the legitimate repre-
          Inspired by the Tunisians, Egyptians stood up           difficult has been the Libyan, mainly due to the erratic, un-      sentative of the Libyan people instead of Qaddafi’s regime.
against their government. Like the Tunisian uprising, it was      stable personality of its dictator, Muammar Qaddafi. Qaddafi,                 A modern, democratic sense of revolution has swept
meant to be peaceful, comprised of civil disobedience, pro-       who calls himself Brother Leader and Guide of the Revolu-          the entire Middle East and North Africa region. It has no ties
tests, marches, demonstrations, and labor strikes. The roots of   tion and also the King of Kings, believes that he is a heroic      to radical religious groups, but to broad nationalistic ideals
this revolution are very simple: the people were tired of low     international leader that everyone admires. In reality, he is      and social values that we of all nations should gladly support.
wages, unemployment, inflation, police brutality, and govern-     denounced throughout the world and hated by his people.            Hopefully, the wave of protests and change will lead to democ-
mental fraud, the same things we dislike and protest against as   Over his 42 years in power, he has murdered political opposi-      ratization and modernization of these countries, putting them
Americans. Interestingly, although the government declared a      tion leaders, tortured his own people, censored speech and         on the road to catch up with the West and to prosper. Only
curfew, the police and the army both sided with the people,       the media, extensively practiced nepotism, and gathered bil-       time will tell what will become of the Arab world after this is
creating a sense of national pride. Although first declaring he   lions of dollars for his personal fortune. His hypocrisy and       all over, but for now, let the Arab Spring spread and blossom.

A Desk Worth a Few Changes... for the Better?
     While Mr. Ziccardi was absent, The Mountaineer staff decided to reorganize his desk area. Can you spot the ten things he really loves? (HINT: “ME-OW”)
                                                             Artistic enhancements by Abigail Hsu

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Number 4 Earns 3 Stars
Julie Paporello ‘12
          Often books that are made into movies can be
                                                                    Caught in its Own Web
                                                                    Sean Pollock ‘11
                                                                               Long ago, theatre artists would dread “Mac-
                                                                                                                                        The Eagle Flies	Straight
                                                                                                                                        Rebecca Hadjiloucas ‘11
                                                                                                                                                  The Eagle, starring Channing Tatum, Jamie Bell,
disappointing depictions of what was thought to be a great          beth” being uttered in a public theater because of the              and Donald Sutherland, surprised me with its sincerity. The
read. Percy Jackson and the Olympians in 2010 to the re-            “curse” it entailed. Perhaps we are reaching an era where           plot was based on the story of the historical Roman Ninth
cent movie release of Beastly this past month, are just some        the cursed word “Macbeth” may be replaced with “Spi-                Legion, which went missing north of Hadrian’s Wall. The
examples of poor translations of books to the big screen.           derman.” Spiderman: Turn Off The Dark is Broad-                     son of the lost Legion’s commander, Marcus Flavius Aq-
          However, director D. J. Carouso, along with pro-          way’s latest hit, but is it a hit for the right reasons?            uila, played by Tatum, tries to salvage his family’s name
ducers Steven Spielberg and Michael Bay, did an excep-                         The show has seen its share of malfunctions and          by becoming commander of a British garrison. How-
tional adaptation in the new release of I Am Number Four.           faulty set pieces, but the blame has fallen solely to director/     ever, while defending his men against a Celtic invasion,
It followed the plot of the book quite well, and the casting        producer/co-author Julie Taymor. Surely, there are other mem-       Aquila suffers debilitating injuries and is honorably dis-
was almost perfect. British heartthrob Alex Pettyfer at-            bers of the crew and cast who contributed to Spiderman’s de-        charged. With the help of his seemingly loyal slave, Esca,
tracted a large number of fans and “Gleeks” made their              mise. The actor who played Spiderman and fell ten and-a half        Aquila will venture into the uncharted lands of northern
way to see Dianna Agron in the role of Sarah. Great char-           feet cited that he had to sign a contract stating he had to buck-   Britain to rescue the Ninth Legion’s eagle standard. How-
acters, highly developed special effects, a fast paced plot,        le his own harness. The same goes for the other injured actors.     ever, a near fatal run-in with Celtic tribesman will reverse
                                                                               The idea for the transition to Broadway came from        the positions of the two men, Aquila becoming slave to the
and a fairly good soundtrack, all adds up to three-stars.
                                                                    Pink Panther producer Tony Adams in 2002. He approached             servant who once called him master. Will loyalty prevail?                                        director Julie Taymor, director of The Lion King, and Bono                    The film was exciting and poignant. While the casting
                                                                    and the Edge to write the music. It all seemed like a fine          of Channing Tatum as the lead disappoints me (he lacks a certain
                                                                    idea, until October 2005, when Adams died of a stroke dur-          depth the plot required), the movie is certainly worth watching.
                                                                    ing a meeting with the creative team members. Perhaps this
                                                                    should have been seen as an omen, but the team pressed on.
                                                                               After the creative team scrambled to find the
                                                                    appropriate funding for the project, Taymor and com-
                                                                    pany held a few readings of the script, which were met
                                                                    with negative feedback. Taymor pitched the production
                                                                    as a full-scale “extravaganza” and “circus rock-‘n-roll
                                                                    drama” to fellow producers. Taymor did not go back on
                                                                    her word, the show is exactly an “extravagant circus.”
                                                                               With $65 million dollars down the tube and a few
                                                                    injured cast members later, Spiderman’s unfortunate fate has
                                                                    reached an almost comical degree. Parodies have appeared on
                                                                    Conan ‘O Brian, SNL and in The New Yorker. Two new mu-
                                                                    sicals on the NY theatre scene directly parody the material:
                                                                    The Spidey Project and Spidey Smackdown: The Musical!
                                                                               For all its shortcomings, the play’s team had good in-
                                                                    tentions; revolutionizing visual effects and creating a tourist-
                                                                    friendly musical with a positive message are all noble pursuits.

          There were minor problems, like the misrepresented
age of John Smith, the protagonist. Some of Number Four’s
‘legacies’ (or super powers) were slightly changed as well,
but if anything, they added to the excitement of the movie.
          I Am Number Four was obviously no Lord of
the Rings, but was still a good adaptation. It was a great
book and made for an entertaining movie experience.

Not So Distant Future?                                                                                                                  Plato and a Platypus Walk Into
Rebecca Hadjiloucas ‘11                                                                                                                 a Bar…
        Once every so often you see a movie that re-                                                                                    Rebecca Hadjiloucas ‘11
ally makes you think, The Adjustment Bureau was one                                                                                               What is the nature of reality? Is the truth subjec-
such movie. The film, starring Matt Damon and Em-                                                                                       tive? Does God exist? These are some of the questions
ily Blunt, was philosophically provocative, enjoy-                                                                                      posed in Plato and a Platypus Walk into a Bar, by Thomas
able, and displayed a positive, inspirational message.                                                                                  Cathcart and Daniel Klein, two Harvard philosophy ma-
                                                                                                       jors. The book details various branches of philosophy, in-
                                                                                                                                        cluding metaphysics, epistemology, and existentialism.
                                                                                                                                        The authors use jokes to explain the nature and meaning
                                                                                                                                        behind different philosophical questions, bringing hu-

                                                                    An Incredible Union?                                                mor and accessibility to an often rigidly academic subject.
                                                                                                                                                  The read is brief, enjoyable, and informative- after
                                                                    Brit Felsen-Parsons ‘12                                             finishing, you will have learned some interesting facts about
                                                                                                                                        philosophy’s greatest figures and be left with an irrepress-
                                                                    The new album, “The Union,” was a collaborative effort be-          ible urge to spring jokes on unsuspecting bystanders. Cath-
                                                                    tween Elton John and Leon Russell. It was first conceived by        cart and Klein recently published a second book, entitled
                                                                    the former as an acknowledgement of the profound influence          Heidegger and a Hippo Walk Through Those Pearly Gates,
                                                                    folk rock legend Russell had on Elton John’s musical style.         all about the innate philosophical humor behind coming to
           Based on the Phillip K. Dick story, “Adjustment          And what a collaboration it is—the two giants of the music          terms with our own mortality. I highly recommend them both.
Team,” The Adjustment Bureau follows David Norris, played           industry share disc space equally throughout the 14-track CD,
by Matt Damon, a senate hopeful from New York. Norris,              bringing to the project over a century of musical wisdom be-
despite a rocky childhood and the loss of both his mother and       tween them. The combination of these two iconic personali-
brother, does not question the fibers of existence, the limits      ties makes for over an hour of distilled enjoyment. The CD
of free will, or if his actions can truly be considered his own,    is a medley of blues, rock, and gospel, with a folk-country
at least until he meets Elise. Elise, portrayed by Emily Blunt,     feel, rich piano, and backup. Every track is uniquely bril-
is a free-spirited ballerina who disrupts Norris’s comfortable      liant; the harrowing “When Love Is Dying,” the sorrowful
routine. Their attraction calls forth the wrath of fate, and Nor-   and longing “Gone to Shiloh” and the catchy and emotionally
ris must ultimately decide between two realities, the one he        resonant “If It Wasn’t for Bad” are arguably the best work of
has known since birth, or one he chooses to create for himself.     both artists’ later careers. The deluxe edition contains two
           In the end, the plot is one of universal application.    additional bonus tracks, “My Kind of Hell” and “Manda-
For we each must decide between a life unquestioned and             lay Again,” and a short DVD directed by Cameron Crowe
vaguely our own, or to fight for our own convictions, how-          showing studio footage and interviews. This CD will take its
ever futile the battle may be, on however grand a battlefield.      rightful place amongst the definitive classics of the genre.                 moc.citatscl.www//:ptth

                                                                                                   6                            Visit us online @ for more articles!
                                                                          Charlie Sheen
Ziccardi’s Corner

                                                                            In Three
-- ---- ---- ---- ---- ---- ---- ---- ---- ---- ----
Rebecca Hadjiloucas ‘11
                                                                                                                                             In April
1. If you were a tree, what kind of tree would
you be?
If	 I	 were	 a	 tree	 I	 would	 be	 a	 white	 birch.	 It	
envokes	 the	 placid	 serenity	 of	 childhood.                                                                              Rebecca Hadjiloucas ‘11
2. Is the glass half-empty or half-full?
There	actually	is	no	glass,	it	is	merely	an	illusion	meant	to	                                                               Blossoms of cherry do unfold in tune,
trick	the	masses.	
                                                                      Rebecca Hadjiloucas ‘11                              With clarity of beauty do they bloom.
3. What philosophical movement do you find most appeal-                            “Tiger blood pumping,
ing?                                                                                 Adonis DNA, duh,                      And finches sweetly singing songs of spring,
Nihilism	since	it	gives	us	so	much	to	look	forward	to	in	the	                                                              In dance, the sparrow flaps his feathered wing.
                                                                                    winning, not an act.”

4. Do you have an arch-nemesis? If so, who is it?                                “I’m Charlie Sheen, you                   The sky ablaze with purple and of pink,
I	have	many.	However,	I	will	not	give	them	the	pleasure	of	relay-             droopy-eyed, armless, children,              The moon aglow had seemed to me to wink,
ing	their	names	in	this	glorious	publication.	I	will	say	that	I	do	                  I’m a narcotic.”
spend	a	lot	of	time	sitting	in	a	dark	room	plotting	against	them.
                                                                                                                           Of all the splendor e’re an eye could see,
5. A remake of the movie Arthur, with Dudley Moore, is soon                       “I used to make sense,
                                                                              ‘This terrestrial realm,’ what?
                                                                                                                           In springtime, man was richer than could be.
to be released. What are your thoughts?
This	is	another	example	showing	how	there	is	no	more	cre-                          I don’t have a job.”
ativity	 in	 American	 media.	 For	 example,	 back	 in	 the	 80’s	
there	 was	 a	 great	 TV	 show	 called	 the	 A-Team.	 It	 changed	
people’s	lives,	including	mine.	However,	it	was	remade	into	a	
movie	recently	and	it’s	image	was	besmirched.	It’s	downright	
blasphemous!	What’s	next?	A	remake	of	the	Dr. Strangelove?

6. Is Western Civilization on the decline?
Yes,	Spengler	has	proven	to	be	prophetic.

7. With which main Seinfeld character do you most associ-
Frank	Costanza.	He’s	eccentric,	speaks	Korean	fluently,	is	not	
                                                                          ROCK LEGENDS WORD SEARCH
a	natural-born	American	citizen,	promotes	the	holiday	of	Fes-
tivus	and	therefore	resents	the	fact	that	he	can	never	become	
U.S.	 president.	Above	 all,	 people	 anger	 and	 disappoint	 him	    O   P    I     B   T       S    O   D     X   T      C      F      D       X      Q      J      H      W       G      R
on	a	daily	basis,	yet	he	doesn’t	let	it	get	to	him:	Serenity	now!
                                                                      I   L    I     D   M       U    I   P     L   W      E      A      I       H      K      S      N      B       Y      B
8. If you could live in any other era, which would you                A   J    L     N   Z       O    N   K     C   E      V      R      J       A      A      A      E      R       B      P
choose, and why?
I	would	choose	the	future,	which	will	be	a	Nietzschean	age.	          X   D    Y     E   E       W    D   S     P   I      D      D      D       L      S      T      N      U       E      P
Man	will	not	rely	upon	“crutches,”	but	will	rely	upon	them-           U   A    O     Z   T       L    Q   G     D   N      N      Z      C       I      F      F      V      S       A      S
selves	and	their	abilities	to	triumph	over	the	adversity	of	life.	
                                                                      E   E    Q     S   H       S    A   B     E   Q      A      E      E       T      A      E      P      H       A      I
9. Is Wikipedia a testament to enlightened ideals, or an opi-         L   D    V     D   T       P    O   H     K   O      H      F      X       P      J      C      S      Q       W      S
ate of the masses?
Wikipedia	is	life.                                                    V   L    A     I   Y       W    I   C     N   T      E      H      U       D      P      G      M      B       B      S
                                                                      P   U    L     T   I       M    Q   Z     S   A      S      E      Y       W      S      E      H      X       X      R
10. What is your favorite word?
                                                                      S   F    J     E   I       S    O   Q     A   I      V      O      U       V      E      H      L      M       N      O
                                                                      U   E    M     J   A       W    K   E     R   U      V      V      I       V      N      D      I      I       A      O
                                                                      U   T    B     L   O       N    D   I     E   C      Q      L      I       J      C      E      R      C       N      D
                                                                      L   A    P     P   A       Z    K   N     A   R      F      X      E       I      L      E      Z      W       F      E
   ZiccardI’s Dead Idol of the mONTH
                                                                      V   R    Y     Y   E       R    I   C     C   L      A      P      T       O      N      P      G      D       X      H
             Ronnie James dio                                         O   G    A     G   P       Q    N   R     U   Z      F      O      J       U      J      P      U      X       M      T
  “It’s getting close to the anniversary of his                       K   P    F     W   T       C    C   J     A   I      S      R      X       N      V      U      N      A       K      N
  death, so I would have to say it’s time to hon-                     T   Q    Z     A   T       K    N   W     X   A      S      J      M       M      D      R      C      R       X      X
  or the iconic Ronnie James Dio. He meant so
  much to so many--- he’s the “Man on the Silver                      X   B    P     T   B       Y    F   C     N   L      M      O      S       I      R      P      R      J       N      X
  Mountain”, dare I say a “Rainbow in the Dark”.                      N   E    E     T   S       M    L   A     M   E      I      W      G       N      Y      L      W      P       Q      E
                                                                      N   M    S     A   Q       K    N   G     I   F      O      Z      Y       G      X      E      U      F       S      Y

                                                                      BLONDIE                        LED ZEPPELIN                                        ERIC CLAPTON
                                                                      DAVID BOWIE                    RUSH                                                FRANK ZAPPA
                                                                      DEEP PURPLE                    THE CLASH                                           GRATEFUL DEAD
                                                                      DIO                            THE DOORS                                           JIMI HENDRIX
                                                                      ELVIS COSTELLO                 VAN HALEN                                           KANSAS
                                                                      YES                            YNGWIE MALMSTEEN

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                    ountaineer  Powerville Road

The Truth is Stranger Than Fiction
                                                              Mountain Lakes,            New Jersey          07046               Volume 18           No. 4

                                                                                                                                        NEW! Pokémon Black
                                                                                                                                                           LOL ;)
                                                                                                                                                                       1 April 2011

Brit Felsen-Parsons ‘12                                                                                                                 & Yellow Versions
These real headlines are so bizarre, you just can’t believe they’re true! But we live in                                                Kramer Campisano ‘13
a strange, strange world. What can I say?                                                                                                         Much to the delight of Pokémaniacs all over the

    Werewolf Boy Appeals
                                                                                                                                        world, Nintendo and Game Freak have finally brought

                                                                        Man With No Face Refuses                                        to the public, a Pokémon game for the Nintendo DS with
                                                                                                                                        Pokémon unlike any other in Black and Yellow, and it de-

         for a Cure                                                                                                                     livers much of what a fan would desire. An amazing and
                                                                                                                                        almost magical presentation of the ability to battle and
          Pruthviraj Patil, 11, suffers from a rare condition
known as Werewolf Syndrome: thick hair grows all over
                                                                             Transfusion                                                trade Pokémon with your friends and colleagues, and of
                                                                                                                                        course, more than 6,900 brand-new Pokémon to collect.
his    body,                                                                   Jose Mestre, 51,                                                   One of the brand new features that are includ-
except for                                                           began to develop a tu-                                             ed in Pokemon Black and Yellow is the hologram tech-
the palms                                                            mor during adolescence                                             nology that gives you a feeling that these little creatures
of his hands                                                         that came to obliterate                                            will actually jump out and attack you, quite freaky if you
and the bot-                                                         his face. He has thus                                              ask me. However, this also gives the player the power
toms of his                                                          far refused any surgi-                                             to really understand the life of a real trainer and how they
                                                                     cal attempts to remove                                             must compete for survival in a world of wild monsters.
feet. Even
laser sur-                                                           it based on his religious
                                                                     beliefs—as a Jehovah’s
gery     will
                                                                     Witness, he will not ac-
not staunch                                                          cept a blood transfusion.
the     rapid                                                        Amazingly enough, the
g r o w t h                     tumor is continuing to
of        the                                                        grow.      However, the     
hair, but he remains hopeful that doctors will find                  development of blood-
a way to allow him to have a normal childhood.                       clotting techniques may enable him to recover his face.

     Woman Goes to Court with
      Tiny Monkey in Bra                                              Woman Finds Alligator
                                                                         in Living Room
 Evidence of Sea
Monster Emerg-                                                            Combination Daycare
                                                                              and Meth
                                                                                                                                                  Like any of the core Pokémon games released since
                                                                                                                                        the original Red and Blue hit in 1999, Pokemon Black and
                                                                                                                                        Yellow offer some nice upgrades, but if you didn't like Poké-

es from the Deep                                                            Lab Uncovered!
                                                                                                                                        mon then, you probably won't care for it now. In fact, this
                                                                                                                                        Pokemon game is probably the biggest disappointment of
                                                                                                                                        all time to the Pokemon franchise, and will forever remain

Breast Surgeon Moon-
                                                                                                                                        that way until Game Freak and Nintendo decide to create yet
                                                                        President Bush Warns                                            another generation that will probably duplicate the ideas of

                                                                        Nation Against Terriers                                         other generations from years passed. That said, it's a little
                                                                                                                                        surprising how well the company still ends making over 4

lights as Knife Thrower                                                       and Bariffs                                               trillion dollars in revenue for Pokemon Black and Yellow,
                                                                                                                                        which is a testament to the strong fundamentals of the series.

 Evan Johnson ‘14

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