Mental Illness
A Personal View
Anna Ballard (PhD)
Mental Illness – A Personal View
(Depression)
By Anna Ballard (PhD)
Being mentally ill is one of the worst things in the world. It is worse than scalding
your leg, breaking your ankle or even childbirth. I am able to judge this because I
have had personal experience of all of these things and I explain it in the following
way. Mental Illness is much more difficult to bear because it affects your perception
of yourself and changing your view of life from being a pleasurable adventure into a
terrible and frightening nightmare. It is not, however, the end of the world. The
information that follows aims to fill you in on what you need to know with special
emphasis on what makes recovery possible.
What does it feel like to be Mentally Ill?
When you are physically injured your mind remains intact so you still feel “normal”. It
is just that you are suffering a real and tangible pain. When you are mentally
traumatised the pain is different because it can’t be seen and it remains locked up in
your head. In some ways it can feel like your “soul” is affected or dying and that you
are no longer “You”. You may even start to believe that if you are going to feel like
this permanently then life is not worth living. Of course you do (usually) survive and
with the passage of time, medication and psychological help you do recover. Yes,
that’s right you do recover.
One problem, however, with mental illness is that it is very open ended. If you break
your leg the doctor slaps you in plaster and says come back in six weeks because he
knows that the bones should be mended in that time. With mental illness there are a
few rules of thumb but when you ask “How long will it take for me to get better?” it is
rather like saying “How long is a piece of string?”
An analogy that is often used is to describe mental illness as being like a prison
sentence. You are being punished for doing something wrong, which is a common
feeling, and that you must serve out your time if you want to get better. The
conundrum here is that a prison sentence is usually a fixed term. At the end of it you
go back into society as if nothing had happened. With mental illness no one knows
when you will recover, it may be tomorrow or next week or even next year but you do
eventually get there. Your mental balance, which involves many things, will be
restored.
2
Not All Bad
I reiterate that there is always a way forward and once you are well again and the
mental scars have healed you may reflect that your experience was not all bad. In
fact you may find you have learned a lot about yourself and the way you think making
your view of life more balanced and putting you in a better position to cope. So
mental illness is not something to be afraid of and you should not hide it or shy away
from it.
What should you do if you suspect you are becoming Mentally Unwell?
You must ask for help and not bottle it up inside. Mental illness is still somewhat of a
taboo subject but things have changed in recent years. A third of GPs time is now
spent dealing with it therefore the doctor won’t be shocked if you admit there is a
problem. You are not the only person who feels like this. Admission is very
important because once it is all out in the open then you can start to put things right.
Even so people are often in denial for a long time before they seek help. The sharing
of your problem should immediately lift some of the weight from your shoulders. It is
the first step on the road to recovery.
What happens next?
Most mental illness is treated in the community; however, if your condition is severe
you will be taken into hospital either voluntarily or against your will (under a “Section
of the Mental Health Act”). In either case going into hospital should not be feared for
it provides a safe and caring environment where you can be helped 24 hours a day if
necessary. Most Mental Health Units these days provide single rooms with en suite
bathrooms and televisions so in some ways they can be a home from home. Also in
order for you to be rehabilitated you will be allowed out on visits home or to the
shops.
I stress here that the doctors and nurses are there to help you but sometimes when
you are very ill you can become confused and you may think the opposite is true.
Don’t forget other people can help you too including your family and friends and it is
not a weakness to ask for their help.
3
Getting Help - Treatment and the Road to Recovery
1. Medication
I will not deal all the types of mental illness here but use as an example
“Depression” because it is the most common disorder. The doctor will usually
prescribe some form of medication, in this case an “antidepressant”. This is
where you have to be patient because the effects will not be immediate (2-8
weeks - the same is true of most psychotropic drugs that affect your thinking).
You do not need to understand exactly how they work suffice it to say they
redress the balance of the chemicals in your brain that control mood (Usually
they interact with the serotonin or dopamine systems)
2. Psychotherapy
Medication on its own is unlikely to be the complete answer. Once you are
feeling a bit better you will probably be given some form of counselling or
cognitive therapy which is designed to modify your thinking patterns. In
depression people often lack self confidence or feel a failure and they believe
they have let everyone down especially themselves. Other symptoms include
anxiety, insecurity, hiding away and loneliness. It can be daunting to try to
explain to a friend or partner that despite being in the same room as them you
still feel lonely. The aim of counselling is to try to adjust the way you think
about your problems and teach you new ways to view the things that get you
“down”. We are all very good at making mountains out of molehills and
therapy hopes to modify such misconceptions.
Walking down the
Road to Recovery
4
3. Coping Strategies
One useful coping strategy you may be taught is something I call “The Art of
Distraction”. If you are ill you probably won’t feel like doing anything or
perhaps you may not believe you are capable of doing anything. The best
way to overcome this is to challenge this mode of thinking by forcing yourself
do things even if you don’t want to. It may only be doing household chores
like the washing up but it will “distract” you from thinking about yourself all the
time. It will also prove to you that you can do things helping to restore self
esteem and self confidence.
4. Relaxation
You may also be taught relaxation techniques to help you “to switch off”. In
depression you can get locked into a particular train of thought and this goes
round and round in your head slowly eating away at you. Hopefully the
relaxation allows the cycle to be broken. Once again this skill is not acquired
overnight and takes time and practice to master.
5. Time
Finally we come to time itself. Time is a great healer in its own right. Your
brain knows when something is wrong and will strive to correct it. By doing
the things described above the intention is to help it on its way and minimise
the suffering.
There is always HOPE for HOPE SPRINGS ETERNAL
Recovery
Eventually, by following the path outlined above, you will reach the point of recovery.
It may appear a long winded process but if you are someone who is suffering my
message is to hang on in there because there is a light at the end of the tunnel.
You must constantly remind yourself that there is always a way forward and not to
give up. I know this is very hard to do when you are unwell but the more you say it
the more you will convince yourself that you will recover and then one day you will
find your wish has come true.
Everything will be okay in the End
If it’s not okay
Then it’s not the End
5