1. If you are late, quote The Lord of the Rings “a wizard is never late. Nor is he early. He arrives precisely when he means to.” If they have ever read The Lord of the Rings, they might recognise the line. If they haven’t read the book, act as if everyone in the whole wide world knows the line except them. There’s nothing that gets a teacher’s self esteem down than feeling like they’re the only ones who don’t know something. 2. Threaten to drop out of college and start a software company. Bill Gates was a college dropout. He opened up Microsoft and now he’s the third richest man in the world. 3. Ask a lot of intelligent questions…persistently. Teachers like to think that they know everything. When someone starts asking too many questions which are too intelligent, teachers feel inadequate. They vent their feelings on the student asking all the questions, saying that they’re getting off the track or asking silly questions. 4. Every time he/she says ‘who’, correct him/her to say ‘whom’ even if it’s wrong. Teachers are constantly correcting your grammar. They don’t like it so much if a student does it back to them though. 5. Hand in your essay in a different language – one he/she doesn’t know. This is especially effective if it’s your English or LOTE teacher. When they ask you why you did it in a different language, say that you were broadening your horizons. 6. Use internet shorthand n emoticons in all of ur work ;). Another one which will be especially effective if it your English teacher. It’s something that all English teachers have been programmed to not stand. 7. Ask him/her why they ask questions if they “supposedly” know the answers. This will get them very annoyed. If they ignore understand that they don’t really know the answers. 8. Arrive to class late and when he/she asks you why, say because you’re not on time. Make sure your teacher can handle a joke though and you aren’t consistently late for class. 9. Mis pel evrury fink on purrposs. This one will definitely give your English teacher a heart attack. You are just trying to help them do their job though. .sdrawkcab gnihtyreve etirw .01 It will take them a little while to decipher what you have written. If they still don’t get it, tell them to see how Leonardo da Vinci wrote his notes.
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